Making a Claim
by sistersydney
Summary: The coven from S.A. are making plans to come to claim Nessie to build their idea of a super-race with the half breeds. Jake has to take Nessie into hiding, just as they are developing their relationship into something more than it ever was. ManyLemons
1. Chapter 1

It was weird to not be with Jacob every day

It was weird to not be with Jacob every day, all day. He had gone to the La Push to see his father, Billy, whose health was not getting any better. Even though Sue and Papa were bringing him every meal and making him see Grandpa Carlisle regularly, he was deteriorating. We all saw it happening. My dad thought it was time that Billy joined his ancestors, but it was too hard of a topic to discuss with Jacob, or my mom for that matter. I think my dad was jealous that the Quileutes had such a hopefully afterlife, and 'one could be so lucky,' he would say.

Since I was born, almost 8 years ago, Jacob and I have been together everyday. This pulled Jacob away from his pack and his father. It wasn't intentional; it was just the way it was. Jacob couldn't not be with me, and I was starting to think I couldn't be without him as well. Our relationship was developing and the hugs and I love you's seemed to hold a little longer and mean a little more. I was excited to be with Jacob in a different way then before.

Initially, he was like my brother; always with my family, another member of the freak-fest that my family was. 6 pure-blood vampires, ironic term, I know, one half breed – me, my mother was human when I was born, but was turned right after my birth, and my father was an 116 year old vampire, and Jacob, a shape-shifting werewolf. He was mostly in human form these days. I thought it was cute when I was littler that my family member was a doll half the time. I learned later that he stayed in werewolf form, or phased frequently so that he wouldn't age.

It wasn't weird, it was all I knew, and I didn't compare it to other families.

Thankfully Uncle E had built Jake his own little place on our property although he was use to the smell of 'the vampires,' he was different and needed his space.

I was tiny in comparison to Jake, although I had grown to an 18 year old in size in a mere 7 and a half years. I was fully grown, for what Grandpa could tell anyway. My dad and Jacob had become very close, and had an "understanding" when it came to me. My mom told me how much my dad and Jake use to despise one another. I couldn't even imagine it, all of our family trips, and functions, it was my mom and dad and me and Jake; like we were the kids, although Jake was bigger then all of us. Growing up, Jake was my brother, he was my fathers confidant and my mothers old best friend. He lightened up almost every intense situation, usually brought on by my dad and it felt like we were growing up together. Things had shifted a little in the last few months, our alone time felt… different.

"Hey Nes" Jake was back.

"Hey, how was your dad?" I was laying on Jacobs bed reading. I sat up to greet him. His room was the only dark place in his small house.

"He was ok, I am glad that he has the tribe and Charlie, but it just doesn't seem like its going to get better."

"Did you tell grandpa? Is he going down this week? Or is your going to come here?" I liked Billy's visits. He likes me a lot, a lot more then my mom, or so she has told me. He always has great stories and makes me feel so loved, he accepted my and my abilities and my rapid growth with open arms…. Always, from the day I met him, he loved me… kind of like Jacob, but different.

My grandpa's visits to La Push were still something that needed to be pre-organized if Grandpa or any of my family, besides me, went to La Push. Billy had accepted Grandpa as his doctor, but they still had to oblige by the treaty. It seemed silly to me now, but grandpa always said, 'whatever they want, and whatever is best for Billy.'

Jake shrugged his shoulders. " I don't know…" I knew he was upset, I got up and hugged him.

"We can go down there more often if you want. I really don't mind, and my grandpa would understand if I take some time from my schoolwork." I said into his chest. He was so much bigger then I was, he had to lean down and kiss the top of my head.

"Thanks Nes, I don't really know what will help…. Did I interrupt your reading? What you working on now? " Jake wanted to change the subject, so I went with it.

"Just some English reading, nothing major." Grandpa assigned my reading, he was home schooling me, as my growth wasn't exactly discreet, so I couldn't blend in like every one else. I had to be educated, since the rest of my family had more PhD's than Aunty Alice had shoes.

Jake was distracted, he went into the kitchen to make himself a snack. The boy could eat, no matter what. I thought he wanted to be alone, so I didn't follow him.

"Hey Nes," he called from the kitchen a few minutes later. "Do you like this place?"

"do you mean forks, or your house?" I teased.

"My house?"

Jake's place was great. It was small, but had an open space where the kitchen leads into the eating area, which opened up into a big living room. His bed room and bath room were down a hall. He had a great little patio, where we liked to sit in the summer, day and night. It was the main entrance as well. Uncle E built a fire pit for the family just out beside Jake's place too.

"I love it, why? You thinking of redecorating?" I continued to sass him as usual and walked into the kitchen to join him.

"No reason, just want you to feel comfortable here." I had lived with my parents in their own house on the family property as well. Sometimes aunty alice and I would have sleepovers in the big house, and we spent a lot of time there, but home was my parents 'cabin' as they liked to call it.

"I do Jake, in case you haven't noticed, I m here all the time."

"I know, you _are _here all the time….. I guess it is obvious."

"Stop worrying about me, if I didn't want to be here I wouldn't." As much as Jake and I grew up like sibling, we never fought. We played a lot, we teased each other a lot, but we didn't fight. We just loved being together. My mom, dad, jake and I became a family within our larger family.

"Ok Nes, just making sure. You want something to eat? Or Drink? It's really getting hot. This heat isn't helping my dad either."

" Lets go down there Jake. Maybe we can bring some fans, or go into Port Angelas and get an air conditioner for him."

" Nes, that's thoughtful, but I don't really want to go back down there. Lets go down to the river for a swim in a bit."

"Sounds good to me" I was looking forward to that for more then one reason.


	2. Chapter 2

He slid is hand down my across my collar bone, his hand changed direction and he slid his palm across my breast over top of my

_My eyes were locked on his hand he slid it from my shoulder down and across my collar bone, his hand changed direction and he slid his palm across my breast over top of my tank top. I shivered inside, but I didn't move. I felt my the top of my legs squeeze together. This wasn't an accident, he looked down at me and I raised my eyes from his hand on my chest. He pushed up on my breast and lightly squeezed. I moved closer to him and stood up on the tip of my toes, but my lips could only reach hard chest. I kissed him there, and he wrapped his arms around my waist slightly picking me up. He didn't have his shirt on after our evening swim, and he was still a little wet. Who was I kidding, he never had his shirt on these days. I wasn't sure if it was a tactic to start to tease me, or if the summer heat was getting to him. I reached up my hand to touch his face to tell him…_

Some video games by Jake, and some reading by me put off our swim, and as always, we were in the same room. By 9o'clock we were both wide awake and hot, and we needed to cool off. I had a bathing suit in his bathroom, so I quickly got changed. My body had changed so quickly, sometimes I didn't even notice. Puberty had definitely happened. My breast were still growing it felt like. Jake had noticed, as I had caught him a few times staring. I guess it must have been a bit weird for him to watch these changes happen, and quickly. I came out with a towel around my waist, ready to go and caught Jake, just standing there gawking at me.

" what?"

"nothing Nes, you are just… um.. growing up…fast" he threw his head back laughing.

"You should know, my mom said you grew a foot in like a month" I wanted to divert the attention from me. Although a few months ago the top of this bathing suit top had fit a little better.

"It's different when its happening to you, its another to watch it happen."

"Lets just go. Are you ready or what?" I walked out the door towards the river. Before I knew it Jake was beside me with his arm around my neck.

"It's late, is my dad going to come out and get me again?"

" No I told him what we were doing when we left after our visit in the white house."

I was used to Jake talking to my dad without me knowing.

"Are you sure? it's getting late."

"Remember how I asked you if you liked my place?"

"Ya, why?

"Well your dad and I have made some amendments to our agreements."

I knew Jake had imprinted on me, but I always just thought it was that we were going to companions forever, just like it had been. We were always going to be about the same age, so it seemed perfect. I loved being with him, but it was changing, I couldn't shake the feeling or say it, or ask him about it, but it was, it was different that's all I knew.

"what's up?" I didn't want this to be an awkward moment, so I was trying to keep it light, although I knew something was about to change.

"You are allowed to stay with me one night a week now"

_oh my god, what did this entail?_ "what do you mean stay with you?" I blurted out.

"You are allowed to sleep at my house and not have to go back to your parents house. They get an alone night, and we get an alone night."

_Who was this benefiting my parents? Or Jake and I? what do I say now? _

"you see your parents use to sleep together every night at Charlies, but Charlie didn't know, Dad, I mean your dad, would come after Charlie and your mom went to bed, and leave in the morning. So we get to have one night where we can stay up, do whatever we want, no questions. Its not like either of us have school"

"Ok, where are we going to sleep? Your place only has one bed, and its big, but are you ok with having me in your bed with you." We had lay on his bed all the time, reading, listenting to music, but these were all daytime activities. Night time was an entirely different story.

" Nes, lets work that out as we go, I am not saying we are going to be like your mom and dad, but your dad finally trusts me enough you have you for the night and not worry about you constantly. He has promised to not listen to what we are thinking either. But don't get any ideas, pajama's are mandatory.." he let out a loud laugh at his own joke.

"thank god you said that." I laughed as well. _Thank god dad wasn't going to listen regardless of what was going to happen._

" ill race you to the river." Jake took off, but I kept walking for a second. I was in complete shock. What did this mean for us? Jake had always been my companion, best friend, someone I had to have around, a sleepover should be like nothing. We had slept in the same bed on family trips, and certainly both fallen asleep in the back of the car together, but this just felt so different.

I started to jog and was at the river before I knew it. Jake was already in the water, the water was glistening in the moon light.

"I cant believe how hot it is still" I yelled down to him. There was a deep part of the river where we always came when it was nice enough, which wasn't usual for Forks.

"The rest of your family gets to be cool all the time, for once in my life I am jealous…." Jake was staring at me again.

"What?" as I threw my towel on the rocks.

"Nothing, are you going to jump in or what? Its ok if you're a scared." Jake teased.

I jumped in and swam towards him. His breath sped up.

"What is it?" I asked. I never thought before I spoke, words just flew out of my mouth. Something my father said I come by honestly on my mother's side.

"You have just grown up so fast Nes, and you are so… um… beautiful, everything about you is beautiful" Jake was nervous, he stuttered a bit while flattering me.

"Thanks Jake" I smiled down at the water while treading water in front of him.

He swam a little closer to me and reached out his long arm and put his hot hands around my waist.

"You ok? Is _this_ ok?" speaking to his warm hands on my body.

I just nodded. It felt more then ok, it felt natural, like nothing should ever be different again. I swallowed hard, I was breathing hard, although swimming was barely exerting me.

I reached out my arms and wrapped them on the outside of his bi-ceps. I held onto him. Our eyes, that had been avoiding each other, finally locked…

"Nes…"

"Ya?"

"I love you, ya know?" he whispered.

I just nodded.

"I love you in many ways, and its growing and changing. And you don't have to feel the same way, but I just want you to know."

I nodded again, I felt excited and calm at the same time. I smiled at him and pulled him in a little closer. Our legs were getting intertwined while we treaded water. I was purposely not touching his face so that he could not see what I wanted in that moment.

"I hope my dad cant hear me"

"I don't really want to think about your dad right now…"he whispered. Jake looked at me and pulled me in. He slowly kissed my check and then my nose and then my other cheek. His nose followed the line of his kiss. Each kiss was slow and passionate. Different then the usual kiss on the cheek before we left each other. Our eye locked again, with our noses touching I lifted my chin and I initiated the kiss. His lips were warm and incredibly soft. The kiss moved from a peck to our lips sliding between each other's. Jacobs's bottom lip was very full and felt so good between my lips. I liked the feeling of sucking on it quickly, and I think he liked that very much, because he pulled me in closer to him. I had stopped swimming now, and I was relying on him to keep me afloat. Jake was the one to pull away and swam us to the edge of the river. He picked me up and placed me on a rock. He grabbed our towels, and wrapped my around me. I couldn't take my eyes off my Jacob, his movements were so beautiful, his muscles were out of a magazine and he was _mine_. I was realizing at that moment that he was more mine then I had ever comprehended before.

"Are we done here?" I asked.

"Yup, lets go back and make a snack and have a camp-out in the living room, I brought sleeping bags from the prop-camping gear in the garage."

_was that it? Was that all I was getting? Now that we had started this and I knew how I felt about Jacob, I wanted more, and I wanted it now._

I would have to settle for him holding my hand on our slow walk back to our place for the night. _ Our place…sounds nice_

We got back and Jake went right to the kitchen.

"I'm going to make a snack, you feel like anything human?"

Another thing my father said I came by honestly, I would eat almost everything. I needed my intake of animal blood, but I ate human food all the time. I never really craved it, or got 'hungry,' but I ate with Jake when I was a kid. It allowed my parents to play the part of having a child. Plus, there was no past case evidence out there to know which would be better for me – the blood I needed, and the human food that was normal.

"Sure, I am going to have a quick shower, is that ok? I need to run up to my parents place and grab some pajamas and stuff."

"Nope, its already in the closet for you, your mom gave me a bag earlier."

I turned and walked to the bathroom, grinning from ear to ear.

We did a lot of travel while I was growing. Thankfully I was almost done, but my parents really wanted me to experience growing up and being a kid. My dad was insistent on it actually. We did Disneyland a few times, some great road trips, we went into British Columbia a lot, we went on family ski trips, we went to Europe when I looked to be about 12. My dad and mom were always so in love and needed to be together. I never really understood it, but they were different then my aunts and uncles and my grandparents; human and not. They all loved and supported each other so much, but still mom and dad were different. It was like they were each other's drugs. I asked my mom about it while on our European trip. They looked so excited to just be together, no matter what they were doing. She told me I would understand one day, but that she could only explain it as a need and a pleasure that was greater then anything else… maybe I was starting to get it.

I jumped out of the shower, I was trying to be quick but I was nervous. My mom had packed me my toiletries_ thank god, I needed to brush my teeth. _ She also put in pajama shorts, a few tank tops and shorts for tomorrow, and my favorite t-shirt for bed. I was still quite warm, so I put on my pj shorts and tank top. I didn't put a bra on, but the tank was tight enough, and these 'things' were new enough that they were holding themselves up. I brushed out my hair, but there was no way I could blow dry it in this heat, and I doubted Jake had a blow drier anyway.

I walked down the hall into the kitchen.

"Smells good eh?" Jake said when he heard me in the hall.

"popcorn… you better have extra butter." I joked back at him.

I came into the kitchen and that's when it happened. We almost bumped into each other as I walked into the kitchen and his hands found my body.

He slid is hand down my across my collar bone, his hand changed direction and he slid his palm across my breast over top of my tank top. I shivered inside, but I didn't move. I felt my legs squeeze together. This wasn't an accident, he looked down at me and I raised my eyes from his hand on my chest. He pushed up on my breast and lightly squeezed. I moved closer to him and stood up on the tip of my toes, but my lips could only reach hard chest. I kissed him there, and lowered his arms and wrapped them around my waist slightly picking me up. His touch had felt innocent, but intimate. I reached up my hand to touch his face to tell him…yes, it was ok, and I did want this and him.

He continued to pick me up and carry me to the couch. He lay me down on the couch and hovered over top of me. Our eyes locked and we kissed lightly. He pulled away again, and locked eyes with me, "Im sorry Nes, Im sorry for touching you like that. I can't help it sometimes, and I think about it all the time. Im sorry"

I touched his face again… It was more then ok, I loved it, but I had a nervous and excited feeling in my gut.

I realized that there was an arrangement of sleeping bags and pillows on the floor there were candles lit around the room. The tv and dvd player were set up for what looked like a movie marathon.

"what do we have here?" I asked.

Jake sat up, I didn't mean to ruin the moment, but I thought I needed to give his effort a little attention and I didn't really know where to take the last moment.

"I have a few TV series on DVD, I have a few classics, I don't know,..check it out, see what you feel like. im going to change out of these wet shorts."

Jake got up and went to his bedroom. I think we were both trying to be as normal as possible, but I was nervous inside, and I think he was too, but it was a little awkward.

"I cant decide, there are too many." I yelled to the bedroom. "What did you want to watch when you grabbed these?"

" I don't know, I just grabbed stuff that I thought you would like" he said as put down the popcorn down and lay down on the floor with me. Unfortunately he had put his t-shirt on, and shorts. The white t-shirt made his skin look breathtaking, I just wanted to touch him.

My head was propped up against the foot of the couch and pillows, it was too hot for blankets, but Jake definitely had enough for 5 people. I was really comfortable,

"You did a god job setting this up you know. I love it, it feels like a camp-out" I giggled and put my head back.

Jake had taken advantage and put his head into my neck. He was taking deep breaths, breathing me in for a few moments rubbing his nose on my neck. I smelled his wet hair and touched his head. His black hair was so shinny and perfect.

" Nes, …umm …you smell so good." Jacob was breathing hard and focused on his task...

I lower my hand to his face and touch his cheek. I showed him I wanted this, and that it was ok. I don't know if he heard my yes through my gift or my eyes.

"can I touch you?"

I just smiled and nodded. He lay on his side beside me, closer then he was before, if that was possible. He started with the skin on my stomach that was already showing between my tank and shorts. He looked away from our eye contact and returned his head to the nook of my neck. He closed his eyes and moved his hand across my stomach. He rubbed it for a few seconds before returning his hands to my breasts. This time he was underneath my tank top. His warm hands made me gasp. I blinked hard with pleasure. I sighed as he caressed both of my breasts. His head was nestled into my neck and my head was falling back and my eyes were closed. He was breathing faster with more passion then I had ever thought possible. The feeling tightened between my legs. Jake was never an intense person, but this felt intense. I rolled to face him. It was less exposing for me, and I wanted to re-assure him that I wanted him to touch me. He slid his hand down my bare leg and pulled it towards him so it lay between his legs. My free arm wrapped around his back. We were totally intertwined. My heart started to race, and my desire to be touched again was increasing, as was the tension between my legs. This change between us was happening so fast. We just lay there and looked at each other, our eyes locked, never wavering. We touched each other, we lay single soft kisses on the lips, cheeks, hands, nowhere else. I let my hands roam and explore his body, as he did the same to me. I ran my hands under his shirt, and explored his chiseled chest and back over and over again. The heat was amazing, as was his frame. I think he liked to be touched, but he stayed calm. I wanted to know every inch of him, and I wanted him to know every inch of me, I knew that more then I knew anything else.

This intense cuddle went on for some time. "Nes" Jake interrupted the silence, still nestled in my neck, surrounded by my hair. " do you want to watch something?"

"not really" I giggled.

As though I said what he wanted to hear, or I granted him access, he rolled on top of me and started kissing my neck and my face and returned his mouth to my lips. Soft, slowly and passionately, he kissed me. My hands continued to touch his back with both of my hands now. His knees were resting between my legs and his arms were propping him up slightly, with his elbows resting beside my shoulders. He pushed off the ground to kneel. He obviously was tired of me exploring him under his shirt because he reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. I had seen Jacob thousands of time without his shirt on. But his abs were flexed and his heavy breathing made his chest flex. It was different to have him on top of me, knowing that he wanted me and this passion was all about me. I reached up to touch his torso. I raised up to slide my hands up to his pec's. He locked eyes with me again and lowered himself on top of me again.

I didn't know what I was doing, but I was doing what felt right and what I wanted. The kissing became more intense and Jacob started to push into my slightly and softly. I liked it, I opened my legs a little further to allow him to completely lay on me. He lowered his hands from above my head to my stomach and up my shirt again. His hand tensed around my left breast and I pushed my pevis back at what he had been pushing into me.

"mmm, ness," he sighed, but it might have been a moan, either way he was enjoying our 'camp-out'

" I know," I gasped.


	3. Chapter 3

Nights like these continued more then once a week

Nights like these continued more then once a week. The designated 'sleep-over' nights were the best. We barely slept, but never went further then light touching and kissing. On the designated nights I stayed, other nights I pushed curfew and sprinted home right when I had to be. Jacob and I were much more playful and cuddly now, with our family and on our own. Our together-ness and love was changing. I really saw what my mom meant about needing that person. My dad seemed tense with it sometimes. He wasn't entirely comfortable with me and my development yet. I was really only eight to him. Although, I know my mom reminded him that I was well beyond my years, mentally and physically.

I had definitely stopped growing and developing. My frame stayed small like my parents, but my body developed much more that I was expecting. Jake was now openly talking about my rounded bottom and overly developed breasts. Both of these attributes were just right for me, not too big and not too small. My mom said she barely had anything until she became a vampire and pregnant, Dad said I was really starting to look like his own mother and mine.

" I have really had to be careful lately, you know." Jake popped a red pepper slice into his mouth.

We were in his kitchen and I was making Jake dinner at his house on one of our sleepover nights. He was sitting at the table and I was busy prepping dinner.

"You don't have to do that you know" he went on…

"Two different thoughts there, or one?" I asked.

Jake laughed, "Ya two different thoughts"

"Well explain" I smiled.

"You don't have to make me dinner"

" I know… and?" I smiled, turning back to the counter where I was chopping potatoes.

" I have really had to be careful not to think about our alone time with your dad around."

My face flushed and I was happy I was facing away from him. _ I was happy about that too. I did not want my dad to hear that._

" Oh Really?" I turned back to face him, my face felt hot.

He nodded and smiled.

I walked over to him to kiss him, he held the kiss longer then usual until he pulled away and I went back to the potatoes.

A few seconds more passed before I heard Jake get up from the table, he walked over behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I put the knife down and put my head back to rest on his chest. He kissed the top of my head.

" I love you, you know?" he breathed into my hair.

I nodded and turn inside of him embrace. I looked up at him and nodded again. I wrapped my arms around his waist.

I don't know why, I couldn't say it. I had kept most of my feeling expressed through my 'gift.' I could show people how I felt, what I remembered, what I wanted, it was always harder to say. All I could do was look up at him and smile.

"do you think you are done growing" I asked as I rested my head on his chest.

"hope so"

" ya right, you love being this big, you run around half naked all the time showing what your…umm… ancestors gave you."

"Im hot blooded, that's all I can say." He laughed. "Do you want me to turn on the barb-b-q?"

"Sure, that would be great." He kissed my head and we both let go.

"It's easy with us, isn't it?" I asked as he walked away.

"the easiest" he said.

I smiled to my self. I grabbed the chicken from the fridge and went out to the patio.

"you're in charge here" I left Jake with the barb-b-q and went to put the veggies in the oven to roast.

I went into Jacob's bedroom to get a sweater. The fall was approaching fast this year and I could feel it, I could smell the leaves and crops starting to die and for some reason I was sad. I had the best summer of my life. I was finally fully grown and I knew the path my life was headed down; into pure bliss with Jacob. I stood in his room for a few seconds imagining it as our room. I would definitely change a few things, but I loved how simple Jake was. He didn't need a lot to be happy, he just was happy. My mom said he was always that way, as a kid, and as a teen. It was in his nature to be lighthearted and caring. I feel like the life he had with my mom was another lifetime ago.

I turned to leave with a big smile on my face.

"how much longer Nes?"

"Not long."

"Do you want to eat outside or inside?"

" Whatever" I answered.

"well you're the one who gets cold, not me"

"we only have a few nights left where I can be outside for too long."

" Outside it is then"

I brought out the veggies from the oven a put them on Jacobs small outside table. There were only 2 chairs. When I came out, he was beaming.  
"what's that for?"

"This is going to be good. I am getting good on this thing." Esme has stocked Jacob's place with the really great kitchen supplies, fortunately she didn't spare many expenses. Jacob grew up with nothing; he barely had clothes through his 'growth spurt.'

"Good! It better be good, because this veggie medley is awesome!"

Jake just smiled and went into the house. He came back out with plates, cutlery, drinks and napkins.

"you are getting good at something." I said

" really, what's that?"

" attending to me, and taking care of me, and always trying to make me happy with out trying."

" I don't really try, I want to take care of you, I have to."

" you have to? What does that mean?" It felt weird hearing him say that. "what, are you my babysitter?"

"Nes! No! it just what I do, I have to be with you, be there for you, do things for you, be with you, be with you, I have to – for my sake."

"Ok, but that didn't sound good." I felt skeptical. He could tell because I was quiet and he wasn't eating. I picked up my plate and began to serve myself.

"Nessie, do I have to tell you again, I have to be with you because I have to be with you. I have to for me. I don't know how else to put it."

"ok jake, whatever, lets just eat." Something I got from both of my parents: stubbornness.

There was little talking through dinner. I didn't know what to say, and he was busy eating. I didn't feel like appeasing him by eating that much. The food was good, but I needed to hunt or something, because this wasn't what I was craving. I eventually cleared our plates and went to do the dishes.

"Can I help you with that?" Jake asked.

"Only if you want, you don't _have _to."

"No, let me, I _want _to."

"Okay, ill finish my reading from grandpa in _your _room."

Jake was silent and let me go into his room. I missed him the second I went into _his_ room. _Why did I have to say it like that? Why was I spiteful? Why hasn't he come in here? What if I was a nuisance? What if he was tired of waiting around? _I had my book open, but I was really just looking at the pages. I really didn't care about reading latin, or studying the roman empire. An hour passed before I decided to go out to see Jake. He was watching a baseball game. The Mariners were losing, again.

"big surprise hey, let me guess they were winning in the 4th and now there are losing by 4?" I had watched my fair share of baseball with Papa that I knew the Mariners routine this season.

"pretty much" jake's eyes stayed focused on the TV.

"Anything else on?"

"ya, some show about guys who were breaking out of jail, now breaking into something, I don't, stupid stuff."

"you ok?"

"unhun" he nodded, but he wasn't convincing me.

"I think I am going to go home." I whispered, looking down.

"why? why would you go home?"

"you don't want me here anymore. You have to have me here so I can give my parents alone time. That's why I am allowed here isn't it? That's why my dad agreed to it isn't it?"

"whatever nes, if that's what you think"

"well that's it isn't it?

Jacobs eyes stayed on the TV, he wasn't watching, his eyes were glazed over, but he didn't want to look at me.

_Look at me, tell me. _

"whatever, so I don't have a choice because I imprinted on you, but I couldn't be happier with you." His eyes still on the TV. "You have a choice, you don't have to think of me that way…. But… at least…I… I… tell you how _I_ feel, you don't tell me, I just go out on a whim. What if you never feel the same way as I do…? Then what? I think about that all the time" he turned to me with the last few words.

I turned my body to face him.

"when I touch your face, don't you see it, don't you feel it?"

"I don't know if its my mind playing tricks or not. I don't want to pressure you; I genuinely want you to be happy. If its with me, then that's more then I could ever want, but what if its not?"

"that's not how it works is it. Don't the women accept their role and fall just like the men do?"

" you aren't really the normal woman. First your only half human, and second, you are half vampire. Is it really realistic for you to..love..err want me?"

_this was it, this is what he needs._ All I could do was close my eyes and raise my hands to his face. I imagined all of our kisses and the feelings I felt. I wanted to watch him, but I had to keep my eyes closed. I was embarrassed to be so open. When I opened them Jacob was still facing forward, smiling grimly.

"thanks nes" he said through his smile.

"can I show you one more thing?"

I reached my hand to his face again. I showed him he and I in his bed with the covers only up to our waists. Laying together chest to chest on our sides. He was touching my bare back, kissing my shoulder. This was my fantasy, something I wished for with him. Something that took over my thoughts at night before I went to sleep.

He held his eyes closed for a few seconds longer then normal.

"thank you"

He grabbed me and pulled me onto his chest. We lay on the couch cuddling for the night.

"time for bed," jake said as he lifted my off of the couch and carried me down the hall. I had fallen asleep during the late shows. My eyes finally focused when we got into his room and I saw the glowing red numbers in the dark. 2:30am.

"did you fall asleep too?"

"ya, I am bagged, and I have to make up the couch."

" I want to brush my teeth" I rolled out of his arms as he put me down.

" ok, me too."

We washed and brushed ourselves. I gave him a few minute to use the bathroon and I got into my pajamas. It was well past shorts and tank top weather, so I threw on my long-sleeved shirt, and shorts but I had another plan to stay warm tonight.

"you don't have to sleep on the couch you know" I said through the door. It was way easier to say from behind the door. The door swung open almost immediately.

"are you sure?" Jacob gasped, his face looked shocked and happy.

" sure, I will sleep on the couch, its your house"

"Nes, I ca.."

" just kidding Jake, why don't you sleep in your bed…..with me?" I interrupted him immediately and went back into his room.

I crawled into bed and pulled the blankets back over me. I was suddenly wide-awake, the midnight nap rejuvenated me. I did not want to just go to sleep my first night in Jacobs bed with him.

Jake grabbed pajama and went back into the bathroom. When he came out with only his bottoms on, I was almost out of breath. He hair was wet and getting a little longer then a crew cut. I was trying to stay calm, but I couldn't. I just looked away, so I wasn't the one staring now.

The room was dark except for the light coming in from the hall light. Jacob got into bed. "Good night Nes" he rolled over and kissed my head quickly. He was being very nonchalant about the sleeping situation.

I was disappointed with that, and again, I was wide-awake.

"Is that all I get?" it slipped out of my mouth before I could think.

Jacob chuckled and I rolled on my side to face him.

"Do you think you should get more?"

I just smiled and rolled into his nook under him arm.

" I know I wasn't a very nice girl tonight, but I… I, I would like.." before I could finish Jacob had flipped himself on top of me. The arm that was around me was cradling my neck and head.

"All you have to do is ask" he smirked at me and went in to smell my neck kiss in my ear.

I wrapped my arms around his large back. Jake brough his face to meet mine and began kissing me. Almost instantly I could tell he was into what was happening and his hands began to roam around my body. He slipped his hands up my shirt and found a tank I had put on underneath instead of a bra. He quickly removed my shirt to expose my white tank top. I got goosebumps from his touch.

"are you cold?" he asked

I shook my head" I think ill find a way to stay warm"

" I think so too" he pulled the blankets up around us anyway.

he returned to kissing me. his lips fit perfectly in mine. He subtly slipped his tongue into my mouth. This intensified my feelings and I parted my legs to allow Jacob to lay between them. He graciously let his weight fall on me. I could feel his groin begin to pulsate slightly.

"Nes, I, I..you.. you feel so good." Jake panted out in between kisses.

Jake's hands began to explore my body. He kissed down my neck and onto my chesk. He started kissing the top of my breasts that were exposed from my low cut tank top. I was panting as he touched and kissed. I ran my hands through his hair and down his neck. His hands went down my sides and his face and lips stayed on my chest. His hands went down to my legs. He pulled them up around him, as he came back up to my face to return to kiss my mouth. _How did he know what he was doing? _

My legs were wrapped around Jacobs. His hands would run down my to my legs every once in a while. His warm touch left amazing. I kissed his neck and touched his body. I slid my hands down his back. I could barely reach his backside, but I tried. I wanted to touch him. Every part of him was strong. He had never felt like such a man to me. Did I feel like a woman to him? I knew that he definitely wasn't like-a-sister to him anymore.

I touched his face again and he did exactly what I though. His hands lowered and lifted my tank up. Before I knew it, my shirt was off and Jacob was attending to the new view of my body. He was touching, and kissing my chest in everyway he could. They were the perfect size for his large hands. He squeezed by breast and pushed himself into my centre. It felt amazing. _ How did he know how to do this? God, it felt so good_

"you feel so good jake." I finally whispered. This promted him to once again return to kissing my mouth. He they went to my ear.

" Nes, oh Nes…" he whispered or panted, I wasn't sure. he moved his hands down my sides and instead of following the normal path down my leg, he went right down my stomach and put his hand on my centre. My hot, pulsating, centre. A moan snuck out of my mouth and I pushed up against it softly.

"are you ok?" he whispered he was kissing my neck now

my head was laying back, but I just nodded.

He didn't do anything but touch my centre outside of my shorts and when he did, I think he knew that I liked it.

Our night was getting heated. I didn't know where to take it. I didn't want to stop kissing him, ever. _ Just tell him that, you can, just say it. Its easier then those three words, 8 letters that you cant say._

This time I whispered in his ear, "don't ever stop kissing me, please" I felt like I whispered and panted that out too, I would have been surprised if he even heard me.

"ok, I wont, if that's what you want, I wont" he was hovering above me looking me in the eyes. And he didn't he just kept kissing me. a little softer now, a little less intense, but more loving and slower.

He rolled off of me and pulled in towards his warm body. My body lay in his large arms. Laying with our bare chests touching felt better then I had imagined, but he was doing a great job at showing me he wanted to give me what I imagined.

"this is better then my dream" I said.

"better then mine too Nes."

"how do you know what you are doing? Everything you do is perfect."

Jake smiled, he had a pleased customer. "Instincts, I don't know what I am doing, I just want you this way, and its new for me, I just hope that I what I want is ok for you."

I just smiled and nodded at him. There were really no words.

I fell asleep in his nook. His body kept me warm all night.

I woke up late, I was in the bed alone, but still without a shirt. I sat up, holding the sheet in front of me, looking for my shirts. I finally found them in the sheets and emerged to the kitchen.

"Morning Nes, how did you sleep?"

I smiled, and went over to Jacob lying on the couch, flipping channels.

"I slept great. You?"

He nodded and smiled to himself.

"What are you smirking at hun?" I punched his arm.

"Nothing, I just can get use to that, and having you in my bed."

"oh really!"

" I just don't know how to ask your parents for another few nights a week without them, better yet, your dad from seeing through me, and hearing me."

"Why don't we just keep the normal schedule for a little while, but make the most of our time." I leaned in and kissed his cheek. I did not want to have to ask for that either, mostly not have my dad hear about the developments in our relationship and take away all alone time.

We both turned to the patio door. My grandpa was standing there. Jake waved him to come in.

"Morning guys" my grandpa looked more serious than usual.

"Hi Carlisle, what brings you out here so early?"

"Nes, you should get changed, we have to get down to the reservation. Billy isn't doing great, but he wont come to the hospital with me. Jake, can you call or communicate with Sam to approve my visit? Charlie knows I want to take him to the hospital, but he can't approve my visit. I think Sam should be able to."

"I'll go right now and ill call you when I get there with Sam's approval. Get ready Nes, hurry, ill be there soon, I don't want Carlisle to wait." Jake got up ad headed for the door.

Grandpa and I were rushing and ran to the big house and got in his Mercedes. Grandpa's phone was vibrating half way to La Push. My mom's car was already there. The small house was already full with half the tribe there, Papa, Sue, my mom and now Grandpa and I. I decided it might better if I just stay outside.

I picked up my phone to call my dad.

"Hi honey," he answered.

"Where are you? Why aren't you here with mom and grandpa? Don't you know Billy is getting worse."

"Calm down Nes, I am at the hospital arranging for a private room for Billy. Carlisle couldn't be here and there, so I came here."

"Dad, whats wrong with him? Jake doesn't really tell me. How bad is it?"

"Sweety, its years of neglect of his health and Billy had a rough life."

I was speechless, _is this what would happen to jake? Is that why he didn't want to ever talk about it?_

"Ok, thanks for doing that dad, I am sure we will be at the hospital soon. See you when I get there?"

"You got it."

When times were tough, I craved being with my dad. He always made me feel safe. It helped that usually Jake was there too, but my dad was so smart and calm, _most_ of the time.

My mom walked out the front door and came over to me. "He wont budge, he wants to stay here on the reservation. Jake, Charlie, everyone has asked him, but he wont go. He is worse then I imagined, but he says he wants to stay here." My mom was half talking to herself, half filling me in. "Its so frustrating, urg, I just… don't get it…. Why wont he just save himself? Or let us try."

Grandpa walked out the front door and over to us.

"Nes, can you please call your dad and ask him to cancel the arrangements." He ran his hands through his hair. "All we can do now is try to make sure he is comfortable. I am going home to get some extra pain drugs and then that's it."

"How long?" my mom asked.

Grandpa shook his head. "Not long, a few days at best. He has neglected himself for too long. I wish I could say that I could stretch it to a month at best. He has a strong network of family down here. Sue and Charlie are going to stay down here at her old place so they can be close. If anyone can, she will make him comfortable."

" I am so happy they both have her." My mom said of papa and Billy.


	4. Chapter 4

I walked through the forest slower then I could or normally would on my way to Jacob's

I walked through the forest slower then I could or normally would on my way to Jacob's. Normally I couldn't keep my excitement down for the second I could be with him. Tonight was different. Tonight and every night from now on Jacob would be different. He had heard news that Billy had passed away, at home, just like he wanted. All of Jacobs family was gone. Apart from his married sister in Hawaii, he was alone. She had not been in his life in some time. Let alone since he became a part of the pack, not to mention imprinting on me and joining us as a member of this family. That was it, he was a member of _this_ family. I knew it, my parents knew it, we all knew it. Did he know it? Did he feel it? I know we are a far second place to Billy and the pack. I began to run, but towards my parents house now. The wind against my face let my mind clear and my worries shred from my mind. This was going to be hard to deal with, but there was a bright idea brewing inside of me.

I walked in our house my mom was pacing in the living room and my dad was sitting on the couch looking up at her with sad, empathetic eyes. He turned his face to me as I walked in. " Hi Nes," he whispered.

" Hi Dad" he got up and came over to me, I took a few steps forward to meet him. He hugged me and kissed my head. _how is mom doing?_ I thought, so only my dad could hear me. He pulled away and looked down at me. "She's more worried about your Papa and Jacob, but I think she is sad too."

_I don't know what to say to Jake, I almost want to avoid it. Dad, I just want to avoid the whole thing, but I know I cant. And shute, I hadn't even thought how upset papa will be._

"I know Nes, but in times like these the easiest thing to say is nothing at all, but that never helps people. We have to be there for whatever is needed. We have to try to make things as easy as possible for those that are hurting. And sweety, its ok if you feel sad too. Billy loved you very much."

_I know dad, I am worried about Jacob. I know that you and mom won't die, but one day he will. Urrg, I cant even think about that, I don'…t and I cant._

"Your right, you cant think about that right now. You need to be there for Jacob. He is at his house, on his own, why don't you see if he needs anything?"

Right then my mom hung up the phone.

"Charlie isn't doing great. Sue is a mess too. She is trying to get in touch with Jacob's sister, but no one is able to reach her. I am going to the big house to make some food up for the pack to have at the house. Sam is calling me back in a few minutes with some of the arrangements. It sounds like they are going to do a traditional ceremony, so we all might not be able to go."

"Well love, we can have our own goodbye for Billy in our own way. I don't think everyone would be entirely comfortable down there anyway." My dad reached his arm around me and pulled me back into his chest.

My mom nodded. "I know, its just so sad." If she would cry, she would have. My dad opened his other arm to her, and she came over and joined our family hug. I loved my dad, he was wise, and loving and tough at times. I was his child, something he never thought he would have. He didn't coddle me, or treat me like a miracle, he pure and simply loved me, flawlessly. It was really nice just to hug my parents.

_I love you._ I could say it to my dad this way, it was easy.

My dad kissed both of our heads and we all released our embrace.

"I m going to see Jake now, what should I say?" I looked to my mom for guidance on this one.

"Sweetie, just tell him you are here for him. If he wants to talk you'll be there. Sit in silence if you have to, but just be there. Make sure he eats and he doesn't run off. He might need some alone time too, and let him have it, but always be there. You don't have to say anything. Listen to him if he wants to talk. You'll know what to say when it happens. He has grown up so much Nessie, you'll be surprised what an adult he is now, no matter what he needs you to be there. "

"Ok, thanks mom. Ill call you in a bit, and call me if you hear anything from Sam. When are you going to Papa's?"

" I don't know yet. I'm going to the see Esme and Carlisle, and to get some food to bring to charlies and billys. Ill call you guys when I know."

"I'm going to go with your mom. I wont go to La Push, but I will go to Charlies."

_This means Papa's getting old too, is that what mom's thinking?_

My dad just subtly nodded.

I turned and left. I was running for only a minute when I was at Jake's place. I saw him lying on the couch through the French doors from the patio, so I walked in.

"hey babe" he mumbled.

"Hi Jake. How you doing?"

He just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't really know what to feel. I knew it would happen one day, its just crazy how fast it happened. Crazy" he repeated.

"I know its really sad. My mom is going to call when she hears from Sam."

"It's really great of him to organize everything. I wouldn't know where to start. Doesn't help that I haven't been on the rez at all these last few years." I just nodded.

"I'm sorry, I guess that's my fault." I trailed off, I felt so guilty for keeping him from his family and the pack; he was the Alpha, although since his life began with me, he didn't claim it the way he could.

"Nes, don't ever say that. I love you, I love my life with you. I just didn't think my dad would go so quickly."

"Did you get in touch with your sister?"

"Ya I called her earlier. She cant afford to come back."

"That's crappy." I just turned to rub Jacobs arm. I realized that wasn't enough. So I crawled on top of him. He immediately embraced me. We lay there for about an hour. His fingers would occasionally draw circles on my back, and he would play with my hair a little. But his eyes were off looking into nowhere. He looked lost. I hated to leave him, but I eventually rolled off of him.

"Where are you going?"

"I am going to make you a snack. You need to eat something."

"Thanks Nes. You are the best."

I quickly made a few sandwiches, I grabbed a box of crackers and some milk for him. I knew normal feeling Jacob would polish this off, no problem, so I was hoping for at least half to disappear.

When I got back to the couch, he was still lying there, but lying on his side. His eyes were closed. I put the food down in front of him and left him alone, I was walking towards the bathroom to take the shower I missed this morning…. _Just be there._ I repeated my mothers words in my mind. _Just be there…ok, I can do that. But how? _

I turned around and went back to see Jacob. His eyes were open now.

"You feel like eating?" I asked him

He sat up and slid down to the floor beside his food. He patted the floor beside him. I immediately sat down next to him and started eating some crackers. My phone started to vibrate on the table. I grabbed it, and saw 'mom' on the called id.

"Hi Mom"

"Hi Nes, how is Jake?"

"Ok, we are just eating lunch." I was trying to divert so I didn't have to go into details with him sitting right beside me.

"That's good. Im heading to Charlies now, and then to La Push. Your dad is coming with me to Charlies. Sam called and said they are doing something traditional ceremony with the pack. I guess its more exclusive then we thought. Charlie and Sue going to go fishing to say their own goodbye. Tell Jake to call Sam for the details. Does he have his number?"

"Do you have sam's number?"

"At home? Ya"

"At home mom, or does he have another number?"

"No I think its his home number, he said he would be there all night."

"Ok thanks mom. I am going to stay here with Jake, ok"

"That's what I thought, that's great Nes. Ill talk to you later."

"Bye mom" I closed my phone. "You have to call Sam at home this afternoon at some point.ok?" Jake just nodded, looking down. "My mom said the pack is doing something traditional. Do you know what that is?"

" I don't really know, ill call him and I guess ill find out."

Jake got up and went to call sam from his bedroom. He came back out about 5 minutes later. I debated turning on the tv, but I felt silly.

"Im going down at about 8 tonight, ill probably be back late. I guess you cant stay here tonight can you?" jake stood in the door way.

"I'll ask, I don't see why not. How late do you think you'll be?"

"I don't know, never done this before." He came and sat back down with me on the floor.

"Whatever you want, ill wait here for you."

"No forget it, I don't want you up late and here alone. Just be with your family tonight. Ill see you tomorrow."

This was my cue, this was my idea…

"Jake, um I was thinking about you and I just want you to know that I… I think of you as my family. I love having you in my life. I could never imagine it any other way. Everyone thinks of you as a part of our family, I just think you should know that even if you don't want a replacement family, you have one if you want it.."

Jake half smiled at me. He breathed heavy and leaned in a kissed my cheek.

" I know, its just nice to hear that from you."

I leaned in and kissed him. His lips were soft and full. I pulled away sooner then usual. I opened my eyes and Jacob was smiling.

"I love you Nes. Thank you." He leaned in again and kissed me again.

He made me feel hot inside. When he said he loved me, I felt like I was dreaming, like he wasn't really saying it. Sometimes this feeling was too good to be true.

I sat with Jake while he finished his sandwiches. I was happy to see he didn't lose his appetite. He didn't talk much, but I was happy to be there.

"Im going to have a shower and then head down to La Push."

"Ok, ill call my mom and see if she is still at Papa and Sues house. If not, ill be at home or on my cell if you need anything ok?"

"Ok, thanks for being here with me. I don't know what I would do without you."

"I didn't even do anything but make you a sandwich."

"You don't know how much you always do for me. I'll make you understand one day." He left the room and missed the huge smile on my face. I felt guilty for a second, but the happiness I felt was overwhelming.


	5. Chapter 5

nessie, wake up sweetheart, Jacob is here" my dad whispered as he cracked my bedroom door

"Nessie, wake up sweetheart, Jacob is here" my dad whispered as he cracked my bedroom door. Light shone in from the hallway light and I squinted and covered my arm over my eyes. It took me a moment to realize what my dad was saying. _Oh god, what time was it? 1:28_, my eyes flashed to the clock. _I can only imagine my parents laying around doing whatever it was they do through the night, and Jacob walks up. Oh god, oh god._ Then I realized, my dad could hear me. I purposely thought. _Is he ok?_ My dad walked towards my bed and sat on the edge.

"Your mom and I were just laying on the couch, to clarify" he looked down to smirk at me. "Jacob walked up to the back door, he doesn't look good. He had just phased back, and he says he needs to see you."

"Ok" I sat up in bed and leaned against my head board.

"I'll send him in. Your mom and I are going to going to be right out here if you or he needs anything."

"Thanks dad." _For being so understanding._

He got up and walked out. "You can go right in." I heard him say.

Jake came in and his facial expression was almost a look of physical pain. I had never seen him so low and hurt. Jake was happy all the time. He took two long strides and slid right into my bed face down. His face was in my lap and he began to sob. His body shook with his silent cry. All I could do was pat rub his head and run my fingers through his hair. There were no words that I could think I, I was torn apart seeing him like this. 'it's ok' didn't seem appropriate.

"I'm glad you came here" was all I could think of after 20 minutes of silence.

"I had to see you, you were the only one that would keep me sane and here."

"Here? What do you mean?"

"I wanted to run, stay phased and just run, but I couldn't. I needed you more. Im sorry to put that on you, but I need you with me."

I slid down in bed to lay with him. His head was on my chest, and I held him. I was much smaller then he was, but I held him, his arm embraced my torso and his cheek rested on my chest. His warm body made me feel tired again, and before I knew it, it was morning.

I woke up before Jacob did to my mom peeking her head in my bedroom door. She just smiled and closed the door. My dad kept the door open a crack. I am sure he could hear that Jacobs intentions for coming into my room were purely for comfort.

"I dreamt I was running through the trees, I was phased and I had been for a long time. I missed you, but I couldn't get to you. You weren't mine. It was the strangest feeling of not being able to get to you." Jacob said. He was obviously awake now.

"well you're here, you got here last night didn't you.?"

"ya, I guess so, sorry I woke you." He snuggled his head into my neck and kissed my ear.

"it's ok, it was nice. And my dad didn't seem mad at all."

"maybe he's getting used to the new us"

"maybe" I laughed. "you ok?"

"I'm ok, I got out what I needed to last night with the pack and with you."

"Time to get up guys" I heard my dad call from the kitchen.

"I need to brush my teeth and shower. Ill meet you in the kitchen."

"I think you smell just fine." The smile I loved returned to his face. "I love waking up with you here."

"You're at my house."

"You know what I mean. I love waking up with you. Normally I just wish I was with you immediately, now I open my eyes and you are there."

"Not every morning." I was getting use to it now too; I loved our sleepover nights.

"Do you want to see if you can stay over tonight? I really need you to be with me right now." He changed his tone to sad and looked up at me with his huge brown eyes. I melted. I wasn't sure if that was his intention, but I couldn't not be with him when he needed, and when he didn't need it, for that matter. I was starting to wonder if he had some power over me.

"Whatever you want…." I just smiled, trying to play off how excited I was. "I'll ask."

"I can ask your parents if you want. I think they will let you."

"My dad probably already knows what you want to ask anyway."

"Your right, ill go eat and ask, you go have your shower."

"Smells good dad. Im going to have a shower, feed Jake first." My dad had become a good cook while my mom was human. He attributed it to night-time cooking shows… but he had perfected his skills raising me and having jake around all the time. I went into the bathroom and turned on the hot water and got in. I washed my hair and body quickly, I was hungry, but it was a different hungry, I needed to hunt, but I didn't want to leave Jake. I thought if he went back to LaPush today I would try to get one of my parents to go with me. I didn't want to leave him, but it had been weeks since I had hunted.

I brushed my wet hair and threw on my robe and ran to my bedroom to get changed. I put in jeans and long sleeved shirt and went out to join my family.

"Im not that hungry dad." _I think I need to hunt though._

"Nes, why don't you and I go out for a hunt? You have been neglecting doing that lately and it is good to keep up your endurance challenged, but it's been weeks. Right?" My dad came right out with it there.

"ya, your right." _thank you, I didn't want jake to think I wanted to leave him._

"You two will be fine here, wont you. Jake, why don't you stay with us for the day. We can get a game of baseball together in a little bit, there is suppose to be a storm, check with Alice for sure though. Call Jasper and Emmett sweetheart, see what they are doing today, or later on tonight. Nes and I wont be long."


	6. Chapter 6

Dad and I went out for our hunt

Dad and I went out for our hunt. We ran for about half and hour before we thought it was a good time to start hunting. I loved running with my dad. He was more graceful then anyone else. He had a way of comfortable silences. I didn't care if he heard me sometimes, and I asked him to tune me out sometimes. Even if he didn't, it didn't really matter until the last few months when my relationship with Jake had changed. Our hunt was great, I was learning great technique and senses from my dad.

_Can I dad?_

"can you what?" he responded on our run back.

_Can I stay with Jake tonight. He asked me if I would. _

"you think he needs you to, don't you?"

"ya, don't you?"

"your relationship is changing Nes, I see it. I knew it would happen, but im you dad, I wanted you to experience more."

"what do you mean? I have, this is my life, im just living it." I wasn't getting mad, I just didn't get his cryptic theories sometimes.

"I just thought you would go to school a few times, meet other boys, always have Jake, but I didn't know _this_ would happen so quickly."

"I never had a chance I guess."_ I love him. _

"I know, I know. Its not the immediate path I would have chosen, and I most certainly wasn't happy with it when you were 5 minutes old, but Jacob has grown up so much. You would barely know the immature boy who use to push my buttons…. Well maybe you would. I don't know if I have changed, or he has. Or everything just changed."

"you're going off on a tangent dad. Are you ok with me staying with Jake tonight?"

"ya, its fine. He needs you."

"thanks" _i love you._

" do you ever think about telling other people that?"

"mom knows, I tell her all the time. I told her the second I met her, im sure you've heard that story enough times"

"she knows, but you need to say it out loud to people. You will have to be around normal people one day, and you cant rely on your ability. Trust me, its not easy not to respond to what people say."

"thanks dad. Im going to Jake's."

"bye Nes, I love you"

"k, bye dad." _ I love you. _ All I could hear was him laughing to himself as he ran in my mom's direction.

I realized I was dirty, but I didn't care, I wanted, I needed to kiss Jacob.

"hello?"

"I'm in here" he called from his bedroom.

"ok, your gonna get it."

"what?" he said, sounding scared he was in trouble. I ran into his room to find him laying in bed. I immediately slid my body in beside his and kissed him like I hadn't seen him in days. "mmm" he said. I didn't stop kissing him. I forced him from his side, onto his back, and I climbed on top of him. I couldn't stop kissing him. His lips felt so good. His long arms easily reached around my body to find my bum. He slowly rubbed my bum and down my legs.

" I missed you" I whispered in between kisses.

"I was just going to say that."

"your dirty"

"I know, I didn't care, I had to kiss you. I couldn't wait another second."

"that sounds so nice."

"I know" we were both beaming. I rolled off of him. "what are you doing in here anyway?"

" I was tired, I was going to have a nap."

"do you want me to leave you alone. I am going to have a shower anyway."

"ok, I cant shake that dream I had last night."

"Im here, Im yours, and I am allowed to sleep over!"

"he didn't care?"

"nope"

"nice" he held up a hand waiting for a high five.

"are we buddies? Do we high five?"

"I don't do this to my buddies" he leaned over me and kissed me, open mouth, tongue, everything…

"hope not, I cant see Quill being into that."

"get out of here, have a shower. You have clean clothes in the closet, and I did laundry while you were out, there are clean towels under the sink."

"thanks"

I quickly jumped in the shower. My clothes _were_ dirty. _ I was the one who was going to have to do laundry tonight. _The hot water felt so good down my back and through my hair. I quickly threw shampoo in my hair.

The door opened to the bathroom.

"Nes" I could not believe he came into the bathroom. I pulled my arms up over my chest. There was a shower curtain, but still. Then I realized he has seen my chest and went to cover my crotch.

"what?" hissed out of my mouth.

" you ok?

"ya"

" I thought I heard you slip"

"nope, Im ok."

"k, sorry to barge in."

My mind was running. Why was I freaking out? I lay my head back to rinse out the shampoo as I thought. _I wanted this, I wanted him to see me. I love him_. He had left the bathroom, but I suddenly didn't want to be alone.

"Jake" I called out louder than normal. "can you come back in here?" the door opened again.

"Ya." He was nervous this time.

"do you… um.. want to…" I blinked a few times because I couldn't get it out. "umm …Come.. in?" I held my eyes closed while letting it come out of my mouth and when I opened them he was in the shower. I traded places with him to let the water drench his body. I was trying not to stare at him, but his body was magnificent. I reached out and touched his chest. It was so big and inviting. I pulled myself into him and wrapped my arms around him. The water was running over us and I wasn't sure if the warmth of the water on my body felt better than having him in the shower with me. It was hard to kiss with our height different while standing sometimes, but he bent down and kissed me, and wrapped his long arms around my body. We stood there until we were both comfortable enough to move. He reached out and grabbed the body wash. He put some into his hands and began to wash my shoulders, my arms, my back, he was very thorough and concentrating. We stood very close to one anther. I felt like I couldn't step back, because if I did, I would be exposing myself completely. But I couldn't help but look at him naked. It was different then I imagined. His Penis was erect and huge, like all of his other muscles, impressive. He turned his attention to my chest. "My favorite part" he mumbled. He made me giggle. This part of my body apparently needed extra attention. It wasn't so much a wash, as it was a massage.

"Guess I got really dirty there didn't I?"

"yup, I just don't know you do it." He smiled down at me." you look so amazingly beautiful" his face went serious for a second.

I pulled him to me. I was so full of love. I reached up and touched his face to say it, but I couldn't. I reached for the soap.

I followed his lead and started with his shoulders and arms. I stayed very close to him. I worked my way down his chest and reached around to his back. I felt his manhood pulsate against my stomach. I wanted to touch it. I closed my eyes and reached for it. I still had body wash on my hands, so the motion was smooth and easy. He put his hand on my and guided me softly. it didn't feel forced, I appreciated the guidance. It felt so good to have a piece of him in my hand that could cause him so much pleasure. Minutes passed and he moaned many times his head went back into the water and his eyes closed as I increased my speed.

"oh god, oh nes. Im… oh god. I mmmm…" and with that he fell over the edge and came at my hands.

I hugged him again and my grin was from ear to ear, but I was too embarrassed to show him how happy I was. He kissed my head many times.

" I am going to condition my hair, can you pass it to me?" I asked, and he reached out and squeezed it into his hand and ran it through my head and down my hair. "I guess no one ever told you only put conditioner on the ends."

"oh, sorry, all the others girls I shower with like conditioner on the scalp." I looked up at him and couldn't help but laugh. "I'll know for next time" he smiled down at me. We switched positions again so I could rinse my hair.

"I'll grab the towels while you do that." He gracefully hopped out of the shower. I finished rinsing and turned off the shower. I was still smiling. Jake reached his hand in with a towel. I put it around my body and hopped out of the shower. Jake was standing in front of the sink and fogged up mirror. He wiped away the steam from the mirror. His hair was a wet mess.

He looked in the mirror and rubbed his face, "I really am tired now."

"Oh, sorry" snuck out of my mouth.

"Don't be sorry" he turned to me and put his arm around me. "That was amazing, I was tired before you got here."

"Well go have a nap"

"What are you going to do?"

"Ill find something to do. I have reading to do for Grandpa." I rolled my eyes, but I knew I had to get it done.

Jake kissed me. " I love you Nes."

I kissed him on the cheek and he walked out of the bathroom. I loitered in there taking my time brushing out my hair. I brushed my teeth. I had to go into the bedroom to get clean clothes. The door was open. Jake had gotten right into bed naked. The towel was hanging on the door. His breathing was so heavy. I couldn't believe he was already asleep. I quietly grabbed pajama pants and a kids sized Disney t-shirt. It still fit and was really cute. I knew Jake like it. Jake was restless, he was normally so still when he slept.

I thought I was disrupting him so I grabbed my book and left the room. I changed quickly in the bathroom. I went out to the couch to read. It was already 4'oclock. I called my mom.

"hey mom"

"hello Nessie"

"are the guys playing baseball later?"

"I don't think so, Emmett and Rose had a date, and Alice and Jasper are hunting, I think, I haven't seen them, and I don't think there is going to a storm tonight anyway."

"Ok, did dad tell you I am staying here?"

"Yes, do you need me to bring you anything?"

"No I have everything. Ill come see you in the morning."

"Love you Nes."

"Night mom"

I started reading for a few minutes when my Grandma knocked on the door.

"Hi Gran" she hugged me. She was the loveliest person anyone has ever met; so calm and sweet.

"I didn't know you were here sweetheart. How is Jacob doing?"

"shh, he's sleeping. He is just really tired. They did their pack thing last night. He didn't really say much about it, but he was pretty sad afterwards."

"Ohh no Nessie, that is so hard. I'm so sorry for him."

"I know." I barely noticed the bags she put down at the door.

"What did you bring?"

"Groceries for Jacob, and you too sweety."

"Thanks, that's really nice of you."

"Do you want me to stay with you to put them away?"

"No, that's ok. Thanks though."

"I put in a few movies aswell. I didn't know what he would feel like doing?"

"Thanks Grandma" I put my hand to her face to show her how much I appreciated her.

"I'll never get used to your gift you know."

"I know." I smiled at her.

"Come up to the house when you feel like it."

"I will. Thanks again."

I put the groceries away quietly and went back to my book. I was happy to have my alone time after that shower experience. I wouldn't really know what to say or do anyway. A few hours flew by, and I really dented part of my homework when Jake finally woke up.

"Whoa, I was really out!"

"Your telling me. I came in the room twice, Grandma came down, nothing was waking you up."

Jake smiled and rubbed his face, "What did Esme want? Everything ok."

"Ya she came to check on you and she brought groceries and movies."

"Its bad enough they give me a black credit card, but now they are actually delivering my food?" he shook his head.

"She's trying to help you out, she wants to make sure you are ok. You know how she is."

"I know"


	7. Chapter 7

Jake was in the kitchen, he had put his pajama pants on since his birthday suite probably wasn't going to be appropriate. He stretched his arms above his head in a stretch and let out a little groan.

"I'm hungry again, you feel like people food?" he said with a deep breath.

"No, I am still full from my hunt this morning, I can make you something though." I went to get up from the couch. I was tired of reading anyway.

"No, no, its ok, I need something to wake me up." He said, I sat back down.

"Why don't you have another shower?" I suggested. "That will wake you up."

"Showers aren't quite going to be the same with out you anymore." He smirked, and walked over and kissed me on the head and then lay down with me on the couch. "Bold move Nes, I have to say; bold." He rested his head on my lap.

I just laughed, a little embarrassed that he was talking about it. "If I thought you were going to complain, I wouldn't have done it." I hit him with my paperback.

"No complaints here." He was so casual, that it didn't make me uncomfortable.

"good. Were you ok with it honestly? I know it was bold, and I thought you liked it, but… I don't know." I was kind of fishing for compliments, but I honestly did want to know, I was looking away and not down at his eyes peering up at me. It was easier to talk about this without looking at him

"Nes… amazing… wonderful." He was stumbling a little over his words. "I mean, It was great. I am happy you initiated such a thing…. Because I don't think I would have."

"why not?" I looked down at him, and now he was looking away.

"I already feel like I am the one pressuring you to be physical with me. It was reassuring to have you initiate and not make me feel like some horny kid."

"ok, and for the record, I don't think kids look the way you do."

Jake reached up and hit me with a pillow and taped me in the head with it. "really hey?"

I swatted the pillow away.

"ya,." I laughed.

"Well, I'll check you out later, and let you know how old I think you are; definitely not an 8 year old."

" As if you haven't already snuck a peek, Jake?" he clearly had seen me naked. I didn't want to think about it, nor stand in front of him naked on cue.

"Maybe, but I need to be sure." His smirk turned into a full on smile from ear to ear.

"Nope, you had your shot, and if you couldn't take it all in, maybe you don't deserve to see it again." I was smiling, but he looked up at me.

"Really, is that the way its going to be hey?"

"Maybe" I shrugged my shoulders and smiled cheekisly.

"I think I can be convincing." He sat up and as he did he slid his arm around my body, pulled my legs up on the couch and before I knew it he was laying on top of me, pinning my arms beside my body.

"Now what am I going to do with you now?" he smirked at me. For the first time, his brown eyes locked with mine. He held our eyes locked for a few seconds.

"You know I am stronger then you, and I could get these clothes off faster then you put them on."

"Oh, Really?"

He nodded and snuggled his head into my neck and just began sniffing and snorting like a dog. "you don't smell very good you should have a shower"

"really?!" my voice went up a few octaves, I was astounded to hear his say that and kind of embarrassed. "You were the one who washed me!" _why do these things come out of my mouth?_

"I know, I want to do it again." He whispered in my ear.

"oh, ploy to get me in the shower again." I tried to jerk my head back into the couch to look at him.

"No, just out of your clothes." I could feel his cheeks rise against my face. I couldn't see the smile, but I knew it was there.

"Nice Jake." I giggled, I was kind of nervous, but excited.

"I can try right?"

We both giggled. We lay there for another hour or so kissing and cuddling, I don't know time went, but jake acknowledged the hour with his grumbling stomach.

"You think we can get through a movie tonight?" I asked while he got up.

"Probably not, its not distracting enough for me."

I didn't want to mention how great Jake seemed. Normal almost, like he had forgotten about his dad and everything. I would ask him in the morning how he was doing. I didn't want to bring it up now.

_Tap tap tap…_

"Who's that?" Jake asked from the kitchen

I saw Aunty Alice and Jasper outside on the patio. "Alice, come in" I waved my hand to gesture her in.

"Hi sweety." She smiled at me and turned to the kitchen, "Hi Jake, I am sorry to hear about your father."

_Shute she had to bring it up._

"Thanks Alice. How are you guys doing? I'm just about to make some dinner, you hungry?" he always liked to bug Alice. She smiled back, but seemed serious, and not in the mood to joke around.

"Come in uncle jasper" I waved at him as well. He was standing back, looking hesitant.

"Sweetie, we're sorry to barge in on you guys."

"It's ok, we weren't doing much." I was sure he could feel the new energy between us though.

"Your Aunt has some things to talk to you about. You too jake, you might want to listen." Jasper seemed serious and concerned. Jake picked up this up as well, because he was immediately right beside me.

"I know, I just keep seeing blank. More blank than usual. When I went looking for it, it was hard, and now that I am in-tuned to it is more obvious, and I have gotten use to getting around it a little with you two." Alice was rambling, I wasn't sure what she was talking about…

She went on…."But I've been seeing someone make a decision to come here with a blank variable. It has to be the son, it has to, but I don't know who it is." She was rubbing her temples and talking to herself.

"Darling, calm down, start over." Jasper rubbed her back and calmed her. Thank god he said that, because she had lost me.

She took a deep breath, "Ok, I have been putting it off for too long. I think they are coming here for you. The father of the other 'halfies' is coming here to claim you. His son told him of you years ago and now that you are fully grown he wants you. I don't know his other people, or him for that matter, but I have this vague sense of his son… the nothing?"

"I don't get it Alice, I don't really get what you're saying and seeing nothing. It's not making sense." I shook my head and looked to Jake, who was staring intensely at Alice.

"Now that you are fully grown, and able to, he wants to breed with you. Create his own species or something. If his son won't do it, he will. But they are coming to _claim _you Nes."

"WHAT!? Claim her, they can't do that. Who do they think they are? Why now?" Jake was shaking his head.

"Like I said, they know she is um…a woman now. They want her and claim they are the same 'species.' I know its not the best time to tell you this with everything else going on.. but I couldn't wait anymore."

"I don't want you to hold anything back now, have you seen anything else?" Jake was getting worked up.

"That's it, and it took me a while to even get that. But, I will tell you everything I see, that makes sense and that doesn't, ok?"

"How long do we have?" he asked.

"He has made the decision to ask the son, or tell the son his plans and intentions, but I cant see if the son is coming or not. I will be able to tell if there are one or two of them when he decided how he is going to get here."

"Have you told Mom or Dad yet?"I asked.

"No, because it's so hard to see, so I don't worry him. I'm going to there house next. I can't keep this from him." Alice and my dad were so close, this must have been hard for her.

"Best not to get Edward worked up before he has to be, right?" Jasper said.

"Right" Jake and I said at the same time.

"Ill keep your dad calm, ok Nes" thank god for jasper.

"Thanks Uncle Jasper, hopefully he won't need it."

"why wouldn't he?" Jake seemed surprised, looking at me with disbelief.

"Because there are so many unknowns. We don't know that much" I said.

"That's the reason why he will get worked up. He likes to play all scenarios out in his head. It drives me crazy sometimes." Alice pointed out.

"We cant be mad at him for caring though, can we?" Jasper said.

"Thanks Jasper, the voices of reason all the time aren't you?" Alice smiled at him, "But, you don't have to have him at you all the time for amendments to plans."

"No, but I have to live with you."

Alice smirked at him.

"we'll leave you to your night." She bounced over and kissed me

"Night guys, nice to see you both." Japer touched my shoulder and smiled softly at me.

"Thanks." I smiled back at my calming Uncle.

"Ok, what are you going to make?" I turned to Jake once they left the patio.

"Why are you being nonchalant here? Why don't you seem remotely upset or worried?" he turned to me, slightly raising his voice. Jaspers calming abilities had been lost.

"I'm just not. This guy has nothing on us. You can't just come in and claim someone. Honestly, one guy? Maybe two; Uncle E will handle it on his own. I just don't think its worth getting worked up over."

"Ok, well let's see what your dad has to say?" he titled his head at me, suggesting how I knew my dad would act. "I can see what you mean Nes, AND_ I_ am pretty sure _I _could handle at least 3 halfies, or full bloods for that matter." He took a step forward and wrapped his arms around my waist and looked down at me.

"You're right, you could too. Sorry."

"I want you to think of me as the strongest person in your life. I want to be that to you. I will never let anything happen to you. My whole purpose of being a wolf is to destroy vampires, it obviously isn't ideal in our situation, but I just think you should know I can hold my own, you have just never had to see it."

"I know, which is why I am not worried. Now lets get you some dinner." I pushed away on his chest, but he wouldn't let go.

"I love you nes."

"I know." I smirked up and him and he rolled his eyes.

We spent the night cuddling on the couch watching TV. I don't really know what we watched, because I was focused on Jake. When we went to bed the same behaviour continued. Less kissing and more looking, hugging and touching each other. Jake seemed needy and more loving than ever before. He rubbed his nose along my neck and face, he was so gentle and soft, and I couldn't help but get wrapped up in him. I fell asleep without effort.

The next morning I was woken by soft kisses along my neck and collar bone.

"mmm" was all I could hear. His kisses became more intense with every second I was awake.

I opened my eyes to the morning and Jake's body was resting half way on top of me. I ran my hands through his black hair and I slid myself completely under his. "Have. I. Told. You. I love. Waking Up. With you?" He said in between kisses.

He pushed himself into me. I closed my eyes and put my head back to enjoy, I let my hands slid down his wide shoulders. His dark skin was beautiful. His kisses began to slow and the intensity was lost. I was a bit disappointed, but the day was young for some Jake-bed time.

He slid half off of me, he pulled up the blankets and rested his head on my chest. I reached for his head to play with his hair again. He wrapped his arm around my stomach, under the tank top I was sleeping in.

"What do you think about making this permanent?" he asked after minutes of silence.

"In what way? What do you mean?"

"About always being together."

"We are always together."

"You don't know what I mean?"

"No, I know we are always together"

"What about always waking up together? Being this way forever?" I smiled at him. He was nervous I could tell. He wasn't looking at me, he was very still.

" I really really like being here Jake. I love waking up with you. But I don't know how my parents would feel."

"speaking of your parents, we need to get over there, before they come here. I don't think they think we sleep in the same bed. Or at least they ignore the fact that they know."

"Ok, lets get ready…. Shot gun on the shower." I jumped out of bed.

"There is no shot gun when you are sharing…."

_**Please review! I want your feedback… **_

_**S.**_


	8. Chapter 8

After getting ready, we walked up to my parent's house as we approached I saw my dad pacing in the living room. My mom was sitting on the couch speaking to him, motioning with her hands.

_Dad relax._

He turned to the French door where we stood. He must have heard us approaching, but was too worked up. He open the door to let us in.

"Hi guys." My dad was spinning his wedding ring on his finger. I knew he was nervous or anxious. He only ever played with his ring when something was bothering him. He turned to face my mom, and went to sit with her on the couch. He caved into her embrace. It reminded me of Jake coming to me the night before. He was upset, and I was the only one who could make him feel better. Then again, my mother could have opened her mind to him, and he was comforting her. She was a bit of a worry-wart sometimes too. Not as neurotic as my dad, but a worrier nonetheless.

"Nes, Jake, sit down." My mom motioned to the couch across from them.

"So I guess Alice came to talk to you as well?" Jake sat forward a little on the couch. I tucked my hands under my thighs, I was nervous for this conversation.

My dad just nodded, still spinning his wedding ring.

"There is a lot to think about, and a lot of unknowns here." My mom said, as she rested her hand on my dad's leg.

"That's what I think mom, that's why I don't think this is a big deal."

"Not a big deal? Why would you think that Nes? Anyone who is hostile and wants to come here is a threat and a worry. For the purpose of your safety and exposure for the whole family. You have to think of the rippling effects of other vampires coming here that don't live our lifestyle. Think about what this will do to the pack, our whole family..." he trailed off, but sitting forward a little, getting intense.

Jake linked his pinky finger in mine, subtly so that no not really noticed but me. I adored him and his gestures. He knew I needed that, and it kept me calm.

"I know dad, I just don't want you to get so worked up"

"It's just hard to think about Nes, we have only had you for 8 years, which is a fraction of my life. It is scary for us to think about you being in jeopardy. I don't think this nomad has any merited claim on you, but any threat to you, I… we…" he looked at my mom with adoring eyes, "…are not going to take lightly. Nes, you are just so precious to us, and we have tried not to coddle you or consider you a miracle, but I never thought in a million years that I would have a child, let alone one who I can live with and not tempted me or out-live."

"I know dad, but there are so many unknowns." I understood, but I didn't want anything in my life to be made a big deal.

"I know that, but can't you understand where we are coming from, I know you look like an adult now, but you are not to us? Jake can you understand my concern?"

"Hey, Edward, I am on your side, I see where you are coming from. I didn't even think about the exposure piece, looks like we might need to get Nessie out of here, do you think?"

"Thank you, and yes, I think that is a possibility that we should consider, at least one of you understands." He looked to me.

"Dad, give me a break. You can handle a few vampires coming here. With Jake and Uncle E, it will be no problem." I stood up when I spoke.

"Sweetheart sit down." My mom calmly said, "Edward, why don't you and Jake go for a walk? Nessie and I will stay here." She put her hand on my fathers back and he nodded.

My dad and Jake left. I wasnt mad at my Dad, and he knew that, I just didn't want everything to be such a big deal.

"Mom, I love that you care, and I understand I am not old to you, but this is crazy."

"I know honey; I just think if your dad is worried, we need to take him some-what seriously. I know he overreacts. I just feel like everything is happening so fast for you. We wanted you to have as normal of a life as you could have. Now we can't just put you out there in school or send you away and not worry about you."

"All parents worry about their kids' mom."

"I know Nes, but there are different threats when it comes to you. Different worries."

"I know mom, but can't we wait to see how this whole thing plays out?"

She nodded, "I want you to experience life Renesmee, I want you to go to school and live a little bit of the life that I knew was to be normal through your teenage years."

"I know mom, I am not normal though, I am not human fully. But the plan was always to send me to school when I stopped growing so quickly. I thought we would talk about January or next September?"

"That's great Nes, but if this progresses we might have to move. But also what about other things? This life is absolute for Jake, but you should know you have a choice. We all have choices. Just because it is that way for him doesn't mean it has to be for you."

I wanted to get mad, but I couldn't. Coming from my rational mother, I had to take her seriously.

"I don't want to leave Forks, or Papa, and I wont leave Jake."

"You might have to Renesmee for a while."

"How long is a while Mom? Why are we even getting ahead of ourselves?"

"Your dad wants to have a plan and I agree with him on this one."

"Mom, I couldn't, I can't leave Jake. I won't. You know what that's like." I whispered. I turned my face to look at the floor.

"I know what its like to be away from someone you really care for, but in my case it was your dad, you and Jake don't have the same type of relationship as your dad and I do."

"How do you know what Jake and I are like mom? You have never asked me." I was annoyed at her for not taking Jake and I seriously. "You know things have changed mom, you can see it."

"Nes, you don't talk to me about it, we haven't had the chance to talk about it... I see it in him, more than I see it in you. I don't know how you feel. Your dad says he thinks you feel differently, but I want you to know you have a choice."

"I know I have a choice. I think sometimes I need him more then he needs me."

"I don't want to take you away from that, but we might have to take you away, and I can't guarantee that we can take Jake with us everywhere we go."

"Why not? Why now should we put a hold on if Jake can come with us or not, he has been with us my whole life…. I am safe with him. He was built to kill vampires you know."

"Don't get smart with me, I know that better than any of you" she all but yelled.

"If you know what its like to be away from Dad, then you know what it would be like for me."

"I am not saying its definite, like you said, there are many unknowns, but it could happen, there are a lot of scenarios that could be possible. Jake could be the best one to send to meet them on their confrontation. They won't be able to see him, if they have abilities, or expect him. But we don't know any of that yet."

"You're right, _we don't_!!" now I was yelling. "I don't want to fight with you mom, I am so happy right now with where things are going with my life and Jake. You don't know how good it feels to not be growing constantly, and to feel the way I do with Jake. Its different mom, that's all I can say."

" I know honey, its hard for us. We didn't think your relationship would become what it obviously has this quickly" she paused and look and me, "But, he always has been so good to you. I don't think he really felt this way about you until just recently too. Before it was a need to always be together like best friends and now, it's something more. Your father especially wishes you had more time with just us, but it look like this is going to be put on hold. Nessie, I want you to know I _do know_ what that is like."

"Thanks mom." She could be so much more empathetic than my dad, more human maybe…

"Do you have any questions about relationships of this kind now that you are in one? No question is off limits. I know you don't know my mom, but that was the best and worst thing about her, she would talk about anything."

"I don't really know mom" I should have felt uncomfortable, but I didn't.

"Have you two talked about being intimate?"

"We haven't really talked about it a lot. I know how he feel because he tells me and shows me. But we don't talk about physical stuff except that he never wants to pressure me."

"Good that was my next question – don't let anyone pressure you. Always do what feels right. I didn't want to wait, I couldn't wait to be with your father, but believe it or not, he was the one who wanted our _virtues, _was the word he used, to stay 'in-tack' until we were married. But I know it isn't that way for everyone. Whatever you decide is ok with me."

"Mom" now this was a bit uncomfortable.

"Nes, I am sorry, I am just trying to tell you to not ever feel pressured, talk about everything. It is the biggest obstacle in relationships. Always tell him how you feel about everything. If you hold back you will regret it."

"Thanks mom." I thought about what my dad and I had talked about earlier on our hunt. "You know I love you, right?"

"I know you do Nes, but you don't say it out loud very often."

"I know mom, I'm sorry, dad said the same thing to me. Between both of our abilities, I have not had to, and it makes me feel nervous and uncomfortable to say out loud."

"I understand that sweetheart, but it is just so funny, because your dad and I are 'iloveyou people' we say it all the time, and have raised you in that environment, its interesting that you cant say it out loud. I understand you were raised to not have to say anything, and I know you have grown out of defaulting to that. I was afraid for a while that was all you were going to do, but you have done so well. Do whatever you feel comfortable with… but I do know you love me."

I hugged my mom. "Thanks Mom!"

"Renesmee, you can come to me with anything you want to talk about, no matter what it is. Please let me know if you are going to make bigger decisions with Jake."

"Ok" I didn't know if I could promise that, but at least I knew she was there.

"Our men are on their way back, do you guys want to come over for diner later? I will talk to your dad, we are going to go out for a hunt for a few hours. You and Jake figure out things _together_ and we'll get together later, say seven tonight?"

"Sounds good, what time is it?"

"Its one already. We better get going, your dad wants to take me out to the mountains."

My mom got up to head to her bedroom.

"ill talk to you later mom, thanks again."

I left through the French doors I came in through and met my dad and Jake outside. They were still talking, one sided, my dad was mostly responding to Jakes thoughts. _Annoying. I wished I could hear._

My dad looked over to me. "mom is getting ready, she says you guys are going to the mountains."

He looked down to his watch, "Ya, she's right." He turned to Jake, and put his arm on his shoulder. It was cute to see my dad and Jake together like this. Jake was so much bigger then my dad… but it was almost like my dad was the parental figure to him. "thanks jake, we'll talk later. Ness, you and I can talk later, maybe I can make you see."

"There is no rush dad."

"Maybe your right, but we'll talk. Love you sweety." He said touching my hand before running into the house.


	9. Chapter 9

"How was your talk with my dad

"How was your talk with my dad?"

"It was good, he just cares you know."

"I know" I kicked a pebble on the forest floor. We were walking back to Jakes place hand in hand. "What did he say?"

"We just went through some scenarios." His voice trailed off at the end.

"What do you mean?"

"We need to have a plan, and a back up plan, we don't know if these nomads have any abilities. He is going to talk to the Denali's and some of the other Natives we met when you were a baby to try to get some information. We don't want to alarm anyone, but it's good to know your family has so many connections."

"My mom made it seem like we might have to be apart."

"I know" he whispered looking down at the ground.

"I don't want that you know?"

"I don't _want_ it either, but if I was made to destroy vampires, don't you think I should?"

"No, I want you to stay with me, wherever that is"

We walked in silence the rest of the way back to his house. His silence made me feel like he didn't want to be with me. I couldn't figure out if I was mad or hurt by him. _Why doesn't he want to be with me? Has his feelings changed?_

He finally broke the silence. "I am going to have to go see Sam about this, see if they are willing to help out. No one has really had to phase that much lately. Sam is even starting to age a little."

_AGE!? What did that mean? Would Jake start to age? There was no way I wanted that._ I was damned if he left me to phase and chase these people down. I was damned if he didn't phase and started to age.

"OK, see you later. I am going to go up to see Grandma for the night, my mom invited us for dinner, but I'll tell her you are going to see Sam." I didn't want to stay there with him if he could leave me this easily. I looked up from the floor where I was sitting in the living room to him in the kitchen.

"Why? Why don't you want to stay here?"

I was silent. I just looked out the patio door to the forest that was turning into fall.

"Nes. Hello. Why don't you want to stay here? We can go to your parents if you want." Jake was trying to catch my attention as I was focused on the window.

"If you are going to go to Sam's and then go away after that, I _should_ get used to you not being here." My eyes still glassed over.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because you said you should go away. You never said you didn't want to, or that you didn't want to leave me." My eyes left the window and looked him in the eyes and then looked away again. "I fought with my mom, telling her I would never be apart from you, and you get back from your plotting with my dad, and you are nonchalant about leaving me. Do you know how….. dumb that makes me feel?" It didn't feel as much dumb as I felt sad. "Why would you want to leave?" I whispered to myself, I doubt he could hear me now.

Jake walked over to me, sat on the floor in front of me and kissed me. He grabbed me by the shoulders first, and the by the face and kissed me with no hold back and all passion. He kissed me the way people kiss when they will think they will never see the other person again. I liked it, but I didn't. What did this mean? Was he leaving?

"I'm sorry" he breathed between kisses. "I am so sorry you felt that way. I love you" he said holding my face looking into my eyes.

"I want you to want to be with me, and never leave me, the way I feel." I said with tears running down my cheek.

"I do want to be with you. I love you. I don't want to leave, but I think it is our best option."  
"We don't even know if they are coming." I think he was catching the drift that I was frustrated.

"Yes we do, Alice saw it this morning. Your dad and I decided the best option is for you to leave Forks. They know the area, or at least the son does."

"Oh" I was surprised no one said anything this morning.

"They want you and will never let them have you" he brushed my hair away from my face.

"So you think this means we _have to_ be apart?" I said with my forehead on Jakes shoulder.

"I don't know what it means. I want to protect you."

"Then stay with me, please. That will keep me the most safe, and sane." I felt tears falling down my face. I knew now more then ever that I had to be with him, no matter what.

Jake wrapped his arms around me.

"If we come up with a better plan, then we can stay together." I felt like I was desperate.

"Well lets start trying." We went through the scenarios that he and my dad had gone through, but we had an alternative that my dad would think was better.

"Could we ask Sam and the pack go to intercept? If they knew for sure they were coming here, its their job to protect the area." I thought.

"Ya, we could ask, but their _job _is to protect from killing or biting people. As much as they have grown to love you, you are not a human to them, and a bite wouldn't kill you."

"We are pathetic"

"No, your dad is just smart, he thinks of all variables. I use to hate it, but I appreciate it now."

"So you think that's it? We don't have another choice?"

Jake pulled back and looked me in the eyes. "Or we just say we are not going to separate, no questions asked. Not an option." He smiled at me, and ran his hand down my cheek. "It's decided. I love you, and honestly I can't imagine actually leaving you alone. Well, not alone, but without me... What I mean is the more I think about it, the less real it would ever be… I could never leave you."

"Are you sure that's what you want? You don't feel like you have to go out and kill vampires?"

"Not unless it involves not leaving you."

All I wanted to do was tell him how much I…. loved him. The thought of being without him brought through feelings I knew were there, but I didn't know how desperate I was….

I wiped my face, and reached out to touch his face. As soon as I did, I knew he knew what I was saying, because the most beautiful expression came over his face. It started with tinge of smile, he looked into my eyes, his expression was straight and focused, and he closed his eyes and took two deep breaths. He opened his eyes with an ear-to-ear grin. I let my hand fall, and he hugged me again. "I love you more, you know." We both laughed and rolled on to the floor where Jake proceeded to cover me with kisses.

"Just never leave me." was all I could get out before my mouth was being used for kissing. We were both smiling through our kisses. I could still not say it out loud, but I think Jake appreciated what I could do and how I could say it.

"You are not going anywhere tonight, you know that."

I nodded while Jake attacked my neck with kisses. "Neither are you"

We were gitty and full of love.

"You don't have to tell me twice. I can talk to Sam tomorrow." His kisses became more urgent. He pushed my body gently backwards. I complied and lay back on the carpet. "Is this ok?" he asked.

I grabbed his white t-shirt and pulled him closer on top of me. I did not feel like talking. He followed my lead and led in for passionate kisses. He sucked on my bottom lip and massaged his tongue with mine. My hands roamed up his back under his shirt. His skin felt like it was on fire. I moved my hands to his hair, it was just long enough to run my fingers through and pull a little bit. I couldn't have expected it but his kissing became more urgent and needy. I loved his movements and intensity. I felt hot between my legs and I slowly opened my legs slightly so he could rest his body on me where I knew he wanted to. I reached for the hem of his shirt. I wanted it off of him so I could look, touch and feel his warmth on top of me. I loved when he sat up from laying on me and I could look at his beautiful body. Those were the moments I felt like he was all mine. I think it was a combination of his intensity to return to me, and the way his body looked…_thank god for those ancestors._

When I reached to pull his shirt up, he sat up, but he brought me with him. He lowered his hands to the backside of my thighs and picked me up. My arms were wrapped around his neck. I linked my heels together behind his back and he stood up with ease. He looked at me and smiled. He walked into his bedroom and lay me down on the bed. He stood over me for a second, his eyes went from my eyes to my toes and back up to my eyes. He didn't pause at any specific area, like a gentleman, and then he complied to my previous request and pulled his white t-shirt over his head. Colors looked so great against his skin tone, but white was my favourite, it was simple and easy, and brought out everything beautiful about him; his black hair, his dark brown skin, and his beautiful eyes.

He climbed on top of me… still gazing. He hovered over me on all fours for a few seconds.

"I'm yours." I whispered, pulling on his shoulders to bring his body on top of me. His lips returned to mine. His hands began to roam my body. Down the sides of my body, his hands reached almost to my knees. He parted my legs slightly giving him an alcove to lay in. His kisses were roaming down my neck and collarbone. He lowered himself to my stomach. He lifted my shirt slightly and kissed my abdomen. He slid his hands up my shirt, with no particular destination. My stomach got nervous, or anxious, or excited, I wasn't sure, but I loved it. He lifted off my shirt and glanced at my black bra. His kisses returned to my neck and shoulders. He slid the straps of my bra down and shifted his body down so that his face was almost at my chest. He slid his hand over my bra and lightly caressed me. He wasn't satisfied with that, because his next action was under my bra. The squeeze of my breast, was in coordination of a light moan from him it made me feel like I needed to squeeze my bum cheeks and lift my groin to him. All the while my hands are wrapped around his wide back.

His lips met mine and with a slight shift upwards, he pushed himself into me, and a moan escaped my mouth this time. It was quiet, and I didn't expect it, but it felt so good to have his body on mine. His hand reached around my back to undo my bra. I didn't want to lay there exposed, so I pushed up on his chest slightly. "Can we go under the covers?"

He just nodded and we pulled back the comforter. Once we were under the covers, we both lay on our sides very close to one another; his hand was laying in the spot where my stomach arched in the most. I made the first move to continue the kissing. Jakes hands stayed where he had them, and I wanted him to touch me, I felt much better under the covers, not as exposed. I reached around my back and unhooked my bra with one hand. I didn't want to take it off for him, but I wanted to let him know I didn't stop him because I didn't want him. He slid one strap off of my shoulder and kissed down my arm. His lips once again, returned to mine as his hands slid my bra away from my body. He rolled on top of me to reposition himself.

"Oh My God, you are so beautiful, you don't know what you do to me" his voice had passion and frustration. I thought it might have been a good thing.

His hand found my chest and he pushed up on my breast squeezing and massaging both of them one at a time. His lips followed his hands and he devoured me. I liked it more then I thought possible. I wanted to feel his pressure on top of me. My centre felt like it was throbbing, especially when he was at the peak of my breast. I was panting. I pulled him back up to kiss my lips. I was urgent with him, I wrapped my legs around his hips and pushed myself up against him.

_Whoa_ I needed to calm down.

Jakes kisses turned slower, less urgent and then he put his face into my neck and pushed himself into me. I could feel his hardness pulsating inside of his cargo shorts and into my burning centre. He moaned into my ear this time, which made me clutch onto him even tighter.

His hands went down my body to my legs. Initially his touch was warm and delicate, and as the kissing intensified, he pushed into me with more angst and his touches felt critical. He slid his hand to my centre again. I squeezed myself into him again. He held his hand there and moved his face beside mine. All I could hear was his deep panting breaths in my ear. His breath was broken and his eyes were squeezed shut. He moved his hand and began pushing himself into me again.

"I want you," he whispered through his breath.

"I already told you, _Im yours_" I said rubbing my hands on his head and down his back. He kissed my ear and continued to push into me with the perfect pressure. As I roamed downwards on his back, I moved my hands between us. I wanted to feel him again. I began with touching his stomach and then shifted myself a little so I could feel the hardness that was pushing into me. I rubbed it outside of his shorts. I was so large and throbbing with pleasure. He moaned again, his breaths sounded broked.

"Nes" he hissed. His eyes were closed and he moved his hands to my chest again, squeezing with pleasure.

I moaned now. I breathed his name and moved my hand from outside of his shorts and put them on his back again. His hands went to my pulsating center. "Can I touch you?"

My breath and stomach clenched. I nodded. Jake undid my jeans quickly. He saw my light blue underwear and smiled, he slid his hand underneath them. He slid his body off of me to the side. He had never touched me like this before, and I was nervous, but it felt so good when he gently slid his warm finger inside of me. I gasped and squeezed my already closed eyes. He paused and didn't move his big hand from that place for a few seconds. I opened my eyes to see his face. It was beautiful, his eyes were closed and his other hand was beside my head, he opened his eyes and locked them with mine. He leaned into kiss me and as our lips met, he began moving his finger in and out of me. On the fourth thrust, he added another finger, which filled me..

I was panting. I could not believe how good he felt. He was delicately pushing into the side of my leg.

My jeans were open, but Jakes large hand and wrist were constricted, as they were fairly fitted jeans. I lifted my bum, and Jake pulled out of me, reading my movement. I sat up and slid my jeans down over my hips and Jake helped to pull them off completely. He didn't make me lay there for one second before he was on top of me. I didn't feel uncomfortable with him seeing me this way. He made me feel wanted and loved more then ever. He moved his hands from my hips up the side of my body, finally to the sides of my face. He clutched me there and kept his brown eyes open and placed individual kisses on my lips, pulling back between each kiss. I touched his face, _I love you. _ He smiled and closed his eyes.

This prompted him to kiss me with passion I had never felt. Every time his lips met mine electricity went through my body. He lowered his opened palmed hand down the centre of my body. Breathing in and out slowly. He turned fingers facing downwards and slipped underneath my underwear again. His warm hand met my hotter centre and once again, he slipped inside of me. His motion was slow at first and sped up gradually over time. He slid out of me and rubbed his finger on the most sensitive ball of nerves on my body. My breath in was a gasp and my breath out was a moan.

I grabbed his head and pulled his ear to my mouth

"You feel so good." I whispered. "how do you know?..." I couldn't finish because I was out of breath and because I didn't know how to say what I wanted to without feeling uncomfortable.

"How do I know what?" he kissed my ear and whispered back.

"How do you know how, you know what you are doing?.. the way you touch me…?" I was panting.

"Your body tells me. You are so responsive, you guide me."

I guess that was true, I was an open book without even an effort. I reacted to everything he did that I liked without knowing what I was doing. "How do you know? I feel like you read my mind."

I smiled. "Like this?" as I reached for his shorts, and unbuttoned the top button.

"Maybe… you don't have to do that if you do want."

I looked up at him with bold eyes and unfasten the rest of the buttons to reveal his loose fitting boxers. They were nice soft cotton in blue plaid. I couldn't push them down without Jake lifting his body slightly, and he didn't. I moved my hands from his belt line to his well-defined backside. As I did this he pushed into me without me expecting it. It was distracting and wonderful. I reached back around to reach for what I originally wanted. It was my turn to slide my hand down his underwear. As I did, I heard Jake moan before I even grabbed my objective. Jake pulled me on top of him, and I shifted off to the side for a better access. The comforter on his bed covered our upper bodies.

His hand followed mine below the blankets and beneath his boxers and he wrapped his hand around mine, guiding me once again. He helped me for five or six motions before leaving me. His pants were the most glorious sound. I felt victorious for causing him so much pleasure at my touch. He breathed and panted my name. his hands clutched the bed beside his body. He called out for god as I squeezed harder and increased my speed.

"Slow Nes." _Oh god, did I not know what I was doing. Insecurity took me over._ My hand froze."It feels too good. I want this to last." He whispered with his eyes pressed shut. I really loved having him in my hand like this; the hard pulsating piece of him was fascinating to me. I loved having him fall over the edge at my hand, but he clearly wanted to extend our bedroom time.

I had to ask, "Do you like it? Do I do it ok?"

He paused and looked over to me. I had moved my hand to his bare chest. I hesitantly looked up to his eyes "Yes, yes." He was still a little out of breath. "I just want this to last longer. I never want this to stop."

"It doesn't have to, we have a few hours before we have to be anywhere." I boldly said. I knew my parents, my dad especially, were our of though-reading-range, and we didn't have to be anywhere until dinner at my parents.

"Your right" he coyly smiled at me, and rolled back on top of me. With that motion he slid his shorts down. His boxers hugged on to his hips. His brown-skinned body wrapped around me as he kicked his shorts off completely. His legs straddled me and he rubbed his hands down my chest. His mouth met my chest again. His eyes looked up at me as he kisses and sucked his way across me. his hands joined his mouth, and I couldn't watch his eyes anymore. It felt too good, and the intensity of the moment made me close my eyes and enjoy Jacobs exploration.

"That is your favourite part isn't it?" I said with my eyes still closed. Not that I was complaining, but Jake paid extra attention to this paticular area.

"Ummhumm" he laughed lightly. "You complaining?"

"No"

"Then shh.."

I laughed at him. He increased his concentration, which made me want more, but I didn't know what I wanted more of. I squirmed a little underneath him, and he moved his mouth to mine and push his hard member into my center. This scratched my itch a little, but I wanted more.

"Please" I said, between lovely kisses.

"Please, what?" he responded with a smirk on his face. My face stayed sober, as I panted.

I didn't know what I wanted, but it was more.

"I want more of you" I going with my instincts, which apparently was the right thing to do.

He shifted his head to rest sideways on my shoulder. His pat my head, and ran his fingers through his hair. "Nes, we cant. Don't get me wrong, I love you, and you look amazing, and you feel even more mind-blowing then I imagined, but I, err, we cant" he twirled a piece of hair around his finger.

Did he mean _sex?_

"Not yet anyway Nes." I guess the puzzled expression on my face made him say more.

"Oh, ok. I didn't mean that." I paused; I think he was puzzled now. "I don't think we can do that either, but I want more, and I don't know what it is. I can't describe it. It feels frustrating kind of."

He smiled, rubbing his hand on my shoulder, "I know the feeling; like you are trying to reach something, but you don't know what it is, or how to get there."

I nodded.

"I can help you try to get there" he smiled. "I want to be the one that gets you there."

"I think you will."

"I am easy to please Nes, you are doing exactly what I want and need."

"But you stopped me."

"I didn't want it to be just about me, I want to please you too. If you kept doing that to me, I don't know if I would have been able to stop. I cant say that my instincts aren't to just take all of your clothes off and have my way with you." He chuckled.

"Weren't you already?"

"Yes and no. I have never done this before, but my urge to be with you this way overpowers me sometimes. I want you all the time, almost as much as I need to be with you. That's part of the change in my feelings for you. I will wait as long as you want, or until we are ready."

I guess this is what my mom meant by talk about everything.

"That is why I am hesitant to not pressure you or feel like I am the instigator all the time."

"You aren't though." I thought I had made some bold moves too, the shower came to mind.

"I know." He smiled and kissed my chest. He pulled the blanket up around us.

"That is the biggest part of this change for _me_ Jake. I have always wanted you with me, but now my urge to be with you is different. I just always want to be touching you, or have you touch Me." I thought of when he linked his finger in mine today, it was perfect, like he knew what I wanted before I did... "So don't ever not touch me, ok?" I smiled and lightly pulled his hair.

"I think I can do that." He smiled and kissed my cheek and then rested his head back on my chest.

All I could think of was the day we would be together that way. After 20 minutes of laying silence he broke it; "One day though Nes." He was obviously thinking what I was.

"One day Jake." I smiled.

_**Did you like my lemon?**_

_**Review and let me know!!**_


	10. Chapter 10

**Please review!!**

"Mmm" I groaned waking up; I was being kisses softly on my neck. I realized right away it was Jake from his smell and softness. I was fast asleep in his bed.

"It's time to wake up sleepyhead." Jake was kneeling on the floor beside me. I stretched out my arms above me. Shock briefly went through my body.

"What time is it?"

"It's only 5, but I have something for you."

"Mmm, OK." I was still only in my underwear, snuggled in under the covers.

"Did you sleep?"

"Ya, but I had that dream again, so I didn't get back to sleep. It's ok though, I am not tired." He smiled at me.

"What dream?"

"The one where I am phased and I am searching for you."

"Oh" I reached down to touch his hand. It felt particularly warm. "You ok?"

"Ya, it's stupid, don't worry about it. You ready to get up?"

I nodded, but I wasn't ready to emerge mostly-naked. I sat up in bed with the quilt covering me, and I think Jake picked up on my reservations, because he tossed a bath robe on the bed for me and I wrapped it around myself.

He waited for me by the door, and took my hand, and led me into the bathroom.

My eyes widen beyond belief. Jake had run a bath for me. There were bubbles in the bath, my book on a little stool beside the bath, clean towels hanging on the rack. His little stereo was plugged in on the counter, playing soft music.

I looked up to him and he smiled. "What do you think?" he asked shrugging his shoulders.

"It's great. Are we having a bath?" I said coyly.

"No we's. You…." He smiled looking down at me…. "You have had a hectic few days, and I want to make sure you get some time to relax."

"Thanks Jake. But I think you have relieved a lot of my worries and stress already." I smiled at him, and put my arms around his waist and looked up at him. "Remember I told you, as long as you are with me, or better yet, touching me, I am perfect." I kissed his chest.

"Ok, but this is for you…. I'll be right out here." He smiled again. "Just enjoy it, for you. I _want_ to take care of you, you know."

I looked at the bath and all the effort he had gone to. The combination of the smell and steam of the room was incredible.

"I know, thank you,"

He turned and left the bathroom. As soon as I heard the door click closed, I immediately dropped whatever was on my body and eased into the hot bath. Jake had a large bathtub; it was soaker style with feet, Esme had done his bathroom all black and white; very classic. His transparent shower curtain wrapped around the tub usually, but Jake had pulled it back so that the curtain was hanging on the outside of the tub and open to the bathroom. I put my hair in a bun, and set in. I picked up my book; non-academic reading, and laid my head back.

I wished a few times that Jake was with me, but I also really enjoyed my time to lose myself to my book. I knew I would have an intense night talking with my parents, but I couldn't help but reflect on my afternoon with Jake. It made me smile and nervous at the same time, smiling won out and I was gitty with thoughts of bed time tonight.

I got out of the bath after at least half an hour and put the robe back on and went out to find Jake.

He was cleaning the kitchen; washing day's worth of dishes. "I am going to get ready. I guess we should walk over soon."

He turned to me and smiled. "We have time I think. How was it?" he turned back to grab a plate he was drying.

"Thank you for doing that, it was really nice. Next time maybe you could join me?" my voice went up as I finished my question.

Jake put down the plate and came over to me. He lifted me up and placed me on the counter. He positioned his body between my legs.

"Maybe, if you're lucky" he said, and I hit his arm, and he grabbed my hand pulled me in for a kiss.

"Am I going to spend the night tonight?" I boldly asked.

He smiled. "..And every night?" he softly added onto my question and continued to kiss me.

"I don't know if that will fly with my dad." I pushed back a little. I wanted to start to stay here all the time, but it would be a little weird to not still have my own room with my parents.

"Ok. It's ok if you have changed your mind about me. I understand if you want to go off with the nomads that are coming for you." He smirked.

"Shut up Jake." I knew he was bugging me. But maybe he was insecure for being forward.

"I do want to be with you, I just don't want to make my parents feel more uncomfortable with this."

"I am not uncomfortable with this, and don't you think we should get them use to it?" he raised his eyebrow.

"I do, but maybe just ease them into it; ask for more sleepovers, but not quite move-in?"

"Whoa whoa – who asked you to move in?" he laughed. "Ok, we can ease them into it." he said as he pulled my hand up to his face to kissed it. "Let's get you ready to head out."

"Sounds good to me." I hopped off the counter and headed to my bag in his bedroom. I kept my hair up, and quickly put on a sweater and jeans. I cleaned up the clothes that had been thrown around the bed earlier in the day. I pulled the quilt up and fixed the pillows. Jake came into the room and opened his closet. He pulled his shirt off over his head, I gawked at him. I was the one staring this time. You would think I would be use to it by now, but nope, he astonished me. He turned to face me frozen staring at him, my mouth might have even been open, I am not sure.

"What?" he held his new clean shirt in his hand.

"Nothing, I just think that's my new favourite outfit on you."

"Just like this?" he motioned at his body.

I smiled and nodded. I walked over to him. I touched his face and showed him when he lay on top of me, and took off his shirt, and when he looked down at me with adoration. The moment I knew the want in him was all for me.

"Really?" he asked.

I nodded and giggled nervously.

"So yes then."

"Yes then, what?" I looked up from the floor.

"Yes, you can sleep over tonight," answering my question from earlier in the kitchen.

"And every other night?" I reversed his line on him.

"Yup. Whenever you want. I'll take whatever I can get." He smiled from ear to ear. "Can I put this on now?" holding up his shirt.

"I know you don't want to, you like being mostly-naked all the time." I rolled my eyes with a smiled and the turned and walked out of the room.

"Now that I know you like it, I won't be anymore." He followed me to the door.

"Let's go." I said opening the door.

"Just try not to think about me like that, or this afternoon, while we are at your parents, ok?" Jake said running past me.

"Oh great, thanks."…. Now that's all I would think about. I sprinted after him. We were at my parents place in no time.

"Who's cooking?" Jake rubbed his hands together, while we were greeted by my mom smiling... She was still in dirty clothes.

"I am" I heard my dad call from the bedroom. We both jumped up and sat on the kitchen counter next to one another.

"Sorry, time got away from us on our hunt. I am going to jump in the shower right now. I wont be long though" my mom left just as my dad emerged. He stopped her to kiss her as he passed her in the entry way to the kitchen.

"What did you two get up to today?" my dad's first question, _great._

"Nes did some reading, I did a fantasy football thing that I am doing with Charlie online. Nothing really."

"Hmm." He mumbled. He wasn't interested in football at all, but I am sure he was interested on Jakes mind.

"How was your hunt dad?" I had to deflect.

"We got started late because Alice and I needed to talk." He turned to Jake and nodded. "Jake told you what she has seen then?" Jake had obviously thought something at my dad.

"Not in any detail, but they are coming?" I asked

"They are getting prepared, that's for certain. I don't want you to be alarmed, and I know you weren't worried about this earlier, but Nes, I want you to take this seriously."

"I know dad. Jake and I talked about it after we left too."

"Its just that…" he paused, spun his ring and continued.. "Nes, Alice sees him canvassing for others to build a new species."

"What? What does that mean?"  
"Edward, what does that mean?" Jake finally spoke.

"I guess they think you are perfect, you blend in, you sleep, you can eat human food, your sparkle is subtle, your skin tone isn't as transparent and a touch darker, you have an ability, and you need blood, but your blood-lust is low." He paused again. "This is what I was afraid of; this is exactly why I got worked up. I knew it would be a possibility when you were born, so rare and ideal really, but I didn't think someone would try to field an militia to come here to claim you."

I was kind of scared now, my dad could tell because he came over and touched my hand.

"How do you know all of this? Alice couldn't have seen everything." I asked.

"No, but she contacted some of her old friend from her last trip, and they were already aware of the plans; things are in motion. But Nes, we already decided we would do whatever it took to keep you safe." He looked at Jake.

"Ya, about that Edward…" Jake went on. "I know you and I decided what we thought our best option was, but Nes disagrees."

"Dad, its not that I disagree, I just don't, I wont.." this was hard to get out to my dad. "I don't want to be without Jake. I know it's what he was built for, but I can't do it." I interrupted Jake a little, but I had to say it.

"And the more I think about it, the more I know I could never be able to actually leave her." Jake added in.

"But Jake is going to talk to Sam, to see if they will go out and intercept."

"Even if they do intercept, that doesn't guarantee that no one will come here." My dad turned to jake and nodded again.

"What?" I didn't like them communicating about me like this.

"I know Nes, Im sorry. It's just stuff from another life." Jake said putting his hand on mine, and then taking it into his own.

"Jake has learnt from my mistakes sweetheart. I understand it's unfair to separate you, but these people have abilities too, we can't risk anything."

"Dad if they have abilities, and they can't see Jake, doesn't that mean they cant see me either? Isn't the safest thing for me to be with someone who can't be seen?" As I said it I was scared to be away from my family too. My dad heard what I was thinking and came over to stand in front of me again.

"I don't know if I, if we can let you go." He looked me in the eyes as he spoke. He reached my soul. Tears ran down my face.

"What did you say to make her cry Edward?" my mom sounded annoyed walking from her bedroom with wet hair.

"Mom, its nothing he said, its just reality. I hate that this is happening. I don't want to have leave you."

"But Bella, we have to hide her and deal with this on our own. We have to hide her with someone who can't be seen as well. I don't even know if we can know where she is going."

"Why not dad?"

"If they have abilities we have to account for all possibilities. What if they can read minds or pull things from anyone of us. I couldn't risk having an army or a small coven come to find just you and Jake."

"What about mom? She can keep her mind closed."

"But I open so much to your father, that I don't think I could subconsciously or consciously keep something from him anymore."

"What about the pack? Could they know where I was going? Just in case? I need to talk to Sam about this anyway. Nessie and I thought about maybe asking them to go out and intercept, just as Edward and I talked about me doing."

"I don't think it is necessary to involve people that don't need to be. If you have to tell him where you are going, that is your decision. I hope they will comply and at least canvas some ground for us."

"Right, ok" Jake nodded he looked a bit dazed and deep in though. I squeezed his hand a little.

"So where does that leave us?" my mom asked, looking at my dad.

"It seems like Jacob and Nessie have to decide where they are going and what their plan is." My dad answered.

"When do we need to decide this?" I asked.

"I think the better and earlier you lay your plans out the better. I would make some arrangements as soon as you can." He trailed off.

"I don't think they need to leave soon, do you?" my mom cuddled into my dad's chest. We were all standing closely in the kitchen.

"I don't think so, but I think they need to get prepared, a month, maybe two but they will need to disappear essentially," he rubbed my moms hair down her head. "…And we can only help in certain ways." His expression was sombre. He looked to me. "Nes, I can help you with how to blend in, act more human, but I can't know anything about where you two go."

"Do we have to do this now? I really don't want to think about why you cant not know. I cant think that someone would use you for that, or get it out of you somehow." I was crying again. Jacob wrapped his arm around me.

"You have to sweetheart" my mom said. "Its for the best, and its not permanent. I guess you two will be moving in together sooner then we thought."

We all laughed a little.

"You both know I won't let anything happen to her." Jake said as he squeezed my shoulder a little tighter.

"Jake the reasons for your and Renesmee's relationship becomes clearer to me everyday. If she didn't have you, I don't know what we would do right now. Sending her away with one of us, or alone, would clearly not be an option, and thank you for letting me see that." Even though I knew my dad must have seen some of Jake and I through one of us, he was grateful. He did just want what's best for those he loves.

"I think your first move is to pick a location. Uncle Jasper will help you with passports, if you think you will need them, although I think your mom could do that too, but I would prefer the person who assists our family with this be afraid of us rather than attracted."

My mom pushed on his chest and smiled. No matter what happens they are always so in love. That was evident my whole life.

"One other thing, money is not going to be an issue, but you have to have to live a paper-less life. No bills in your real names, no credit cards, unless it is an emergency. We should get you some money as soon as possible for whatever you need, but please don't share anything with us, unless you think it won't compromise you."

"Your dad means this with the best intentions. We want to know, we want to help, but clearly, for everyone's best interest, we can't know." My touched my dad's chest as she spoke for him.

"I can't turn off my thoughts, Edward will hear me. I am pretty sure I am an open book to him." Jake said.

"Right…hmm. I don't want to rush this; maybe you don't make any decisions. Think of a whole bunch of places, and make your decision when we think its time to make a move. You'll have enough money to wing it. But let's put the necessary things in motion this week. It will settle my mind a little to know you are somewhat prepared."

Jake's stomach grumbled. "Oh shute, Jake its after 8 and you haven't eaten yet."

"I didn't even think about it, but ya, I guess this body needs it." Jake jumped off the counter, trying to lighten the mood.

"Guys, lets just try to be as normal as we can, for me, _ok_? Just until this needs to happen." I requested. My parents walked over to me and both hugged me. At this point, this was the only thing I wanted. Normal with my mom and dad; my dad being amusing and neurotic, my mom being sarcastic mom and them being crazy about me and each other.

"Nes, life is going to be a little different regardless, ok? But we'll try." My mom whispered; she was always realistic. I touched them both and said 'I love you' into their minds.

"We love you too." They broke the hug and my dad went to the fridge to get food for dinner.

"Are you going to eat Nes?"

"Sure, I guess I'll have something" my dad was acting on my request immediately.

_Thank you dad._

He turned to me sideways, so only I could see and mouthed 'anything for you.' He closed his eyes, smiled and went on. He was soo good at being subtle.

"I have some chicken marinating in the fridge, can you grab it for me Jake." He turned to face the oven and turned it on. My dad gracefully moved though the kitchen, as my mom and I sat at the barstools in their kitchen. Jake was leaning against the counter. He looked deep in thought every once in a while, and would snap out of it from time to time.

_Maybe he was questioning his decision to go away with just me. Maybe he wasn't ready for this. Maybe I wasn't either…._

"You ready to become a cook Nes?" my dad broke a moment of silence.

"What do you mean?"

"Well you are going to live with someone who has to eat three, well in Jakes case, six meals a day. You will become quite the chef."

"Jake does a lot of his own cooking."

"Nes is already pretty good." Jake snapped out of his daze again smiling at me.

"Pretty sure she got that from human-bella." My mom said smiling pointing at herself.

My dad rolled his eyes. "I guess if the only person you have had to cook for was someone who couldn't boil noodles, then I guess you are pretty good." he shot my mom a sarcastic smile.

"Zip it mister. My appetite was much different when I met you, and as I recall, you didn't cook for me until our honeymoon. Nice guy you are!"

"You couldn't cook after you turned for so long the smell got to you, I think I got pretty good, hey guys?"

"No complaints here, but then again, I loved Bella's cooking, and Charlie's, so who knows if even have taste buds." Jake smiled ear to ear.

Our night went on like this for another few hours before Jake and I were tired again. I think my parents almost assumed I would be at Jakes again, so it wasn't even me asking, as much as them asking where I would be. We thanked my parents. I told my dad how much I appreciated him being normal with me, I needed it so much after our decisions tonight. We left my parents house with them standing in the door way arm-in-arm. Jake grabbed my hand, and we walked away.

"It's reassuring to them if we are affectionate."

"How do you know?"

"I don't, but _I _like it." His white teeth beamed under the moonlight.


	11. Chapter 11

Jake and i went home that night, there was a lot of silence on the walk home, and even when we got home

Jake and I went home that night; there was a lot of silence on the walk home, and even when we got home. It was nice, but I couldn't not ask him if he was sure about everything.

"Of course" he responded. "Why would you even ask that?"

"You didn't seen sure at my parents house. You dazed out a few times and it made me nervous."

"I am just worried that I will make you happy with it just being us."

"I am nervous to be away without the rest of my family." I admitted.

"It's going to be hard, there is not doubt" Jake interrupted. "But Nes, I just want to make sure you think I will make you happy and that you are ok with running away with me"

"We aren't running away."

"We are kind of, we are moving somewhere that we don't know anyone. I know I will be fine with just you, I have been doing it for 8 years."

"Jake, what do you mean?"

"I have really liked living with your family, but it wasn't the easiest thing initially, but to be with you out weighted everything else. As long as I have you, I am perfect. I just worry about you."

"Are you sure that's all that is on your mind?" I felt like there was more.

"That's it. Are you ok with being with just me?"

"I know we don't have a choice right now, but YES! I am." And I was.

He came over to me and kissed my cheek. "Good, because you didn't really have a choice either way, did you?"

I smiled and stood on my toes to reach up to kiss him. I wouldn't have had it any other way.

"Lets get ready for bed" he smiled.

We went to the bathroom together to brush our teeth. I finished first and left to get changed. I threw on my normal long-sleeved shirt and shorts. Jake always waited a few minutes to come in, even if he was ready to come in, he gave me some time to change. I turned off the overhead light and turned on the lamp. Jake was probably watching and took that as a cue to come to bed. He was wearing his navy pajama pants and of course, no shirt.

"Does this qualify?"

"Hm?" I asked confused.

"As your favorite outfit?" he pulled back the covers and slid into bed. His face was suddenly right in front of me.

"I guess so." I said smiling. I kissed him and smiled again.

"Don't you think it will be nice not to have to think about our thoughts? I know it will suck to be away from your family, but it will be nice not to have to think about every thought. I never use to have to think about it when you were growing up, but now, it is inconvenient and I can't not think about you this way."

"I know." I smiled.

"Your dad asked me about ' our physical boundaries' you know?" Jake said quoting my dad with his hands.

"What?!"_ what was wrong with my father?_

"Don't worry, he knows what we feel for one another is genuine. I told him I just like to be beside you, with you, in whatever way you are comfortable with. He knows I am a man too and I will want you in that way."

"Oh god, he said that? That is so embarrassing." I covered my face with my arm.

"Ness, it wasn't like that. I was surprised how… how, cool he was. Honestly, it wasn't that bad. Knowing your dad, it could have been worse."

"Uhh, still Jake."

"What do you think he thinks we do on our sleepovers?"

My face felt so hot and his question didn't make me feel any better.

"I told him I just love to hold you." He ness led himself into my neck." I didn't tell him what else I love to do."

"Really" his kissing was convincing me "What else do you love to do?" I really wanted to hear him say it.

"What do _you_ like that I do?" he whispered in my ear.

"No, no, what do you like. I have showed you a few times." I turned my head to kiss his hand that was cradling my head.

"I know, but I want to hear you say it."

"I want to hear, _you _say it." I leaned forward and whispered into his ear.

"Ok" He hesitated and shifted his body to his side and leaned into my ear…. "I _love _it when you kiss me…anywhere. I love how your little lips pout around my skin and slide between mine when we kiss. I love it when you touch me. No matter where we are, in whatever way, your touch is like heaven to me. It sends chills through my body. I love seeing your thoughts and feelings, and I love it when I make you feel good and the noises you make, oh the noises." He lightly laughed.

"Like what noises?" I knew what he meant; the noises that escaped my mouth without my knowledge.

"Your little moans when you like something." He had been whispering in my ear, patting my hair down to my shoulder while telling me. My eyes were closed; subconsciously I was rubbing his arm. He made me feel like moaning right there. I was squirmy and wanted to kiss him.

"Your turn" he whispered, kissing my ear.

"How about if I show you…" I rolled to face him and ran my hands down his dark chest and around the side of his body he wasn't laying on. I pulled him on top of me and began roaming my hands all over his warm body. I opened my legs and wrapped them between his. I hadn't kissed him yet, I wanted to touch all of him first; tease him a little bit. I slid my hands down his back, to the top of his pajama pants that we resting quite low, almost at the point where his backside raised. I hesitated here, my hands wouldn't reach any further, but I wanted them to. I pushed myself up into him and let out a little sigh.

"Like that?" I asked.

"Just like that" he said. I felt him harden through his thin pajamas and push back into me. Our lips collapsed into each other's. He sucked on my bottom lip; lingering the kiss. I raised my legs that were linked into his, and wrapped them around him. His hands began to touch my body.

"Is it warm in here tonight?" I smiled at his question. He pulled the covers over our bodies and slowly slid his hands up my sides, grazing the side of my breast, and lifted my shirt over my head.

"Ohhh, how could I forget this?" He smiled staring down at me. I pulled his body down on top of me.

"Stop staring and start…" Jakes lips and tongue caressing my mouth cut me off. He pushed his whole body on top of me as his hands grabbed for my chest. I moaned slightly, it felt like all of my senses were heightened. He smiled through his kiss. He pulled away and smiled his biggest smile at me. I felt particularly into this. The feeling of wanting more fleshed over my body. It felt like there was something on fire inside of my body, and it was centered from between my legs. I lifted my legs up higher; they were around his hips now. He lowered his face to my chest; he kissed and teased his way, avoiding the most sensitive area, until I almost couldn't hold it in. I was squirming when he finally put his mouth over the peak of my nipple and sucked it into his mouth. He was almost a little rough with it, but it felt so good. His tongue wrapped circles around it before giving my left side the same attention. Jake was always fair…

At this point I felt like I was going to boil. I was panting; I was pushing myself into his stomach because I didn't care where I was going to get the friction from, and when he slid himself down, my legs stayed around him. He then slid up my body, back to kiss my neck, pushing into me with the exact force I was looking for, but didn't know it until it happened. Another moan sipped out of my mouth. Jake shifted his body and moved his hand down my shorts and quickly put his palm onto my center and rubbed. I didn't resist this; I did the opposite and squeezed myself into him. I wanted to tell him I wanted him, without saying it. Jake was panting, my name slipped from his lips as he put his fingers inside of me. I gasped and rested my head back on the pillow and closed my eyes. It was the perfect friction and completeness that I had been longing. He didn't move, he left his hand inside of me, but wasn't moving. I opened my eyes to see his eyes squeezed shut. His breathing was calm now, but he wasn't moving.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

"Nes, you are just perfect, I can't take it. I love you. If I start this, I won't want to stop. I am just trying to compose myself."

"Don't, you don't have to try to do anything," I said, pulling him to my face to kiss me. "I need you."

"I don't think you have any idea how amazing this feels for me. I want you in every way, don't ever doubt that, but if I start this, I honestly wont be able to stop." He smiled at me. He looked nervous.

"If I want you to stop or slow down, ill let you know. I promise."

"But it feels too good to stop, doesn't it?" his dark eyes looked into mine.

I nodded, but began kissing him. I wanted more. I needed more. I pushed my self into his hand, and he began sliding his fingers in and out of me. I couldn't imagine stopping him at any point, this felt too good.

Earlier today Jake wouldn't let me touch him for very long, but I wanted to. My desire to touch him overpowered me. I slid his pants down slightly with my legs and feet that were wrapped around him. He lifted his body slightly to let them fall, but just slightly. Jake had very little hair on his body. The little trail of hair leading to his center was black and soft and led me to what I wanted. "Can I?" I had to ask after having him stop me earlier. He just let out a little moan and pushed into me. I slid my hand down his body and onto him. The pulsating in my hand and the want in his moan was irresistible. I slowly began moving my hand up and down his shaft. I didn't need his guidance anymore. His breathing sped up and his face was in the pillow beside my head. I pulled down his pajamas further, linking them in my toes and pulling down on them. I wanted a better angle; I pushed him onto his back, without missing a beat. My body was lying beside him. I loved to watch his face; his eyes were shut and his breathing was even, but heavy. I sped up my movement and Jake pushed me on to my back, and rolled on top of me again. I put my hands around his body and wrapped my legs around his hips again. He pulled his pants down the rest of the way, and his bare body pushed into me. It was unbelievable what a difference a small piece of fabric makes. He was pushing right into the center where his fingers had been. His hand rubbed my sensitive ball of nerves through my thick cotton shorts. He returned his hands down my shorts and filled me again. I gasped again. His force was shocking, but wanted. I ran my hands through his hair, pulling on it slightly. He slid out of me and returned his finger to my ball of nerves, on the flesh this time.

"Oh god" I gasped. It snuck out of my mouth with shock. He slid his fingers back inside of me and out again rubbing the nerves that were rocking through my body.

"I want you more then I should." He said.

"I think you want me the perfect amount."

"You are the most beautiful being on this planet."

"I want more." I said.

"I can do that." He smiled. "I want to make you feel so good."

"Accomplished." I smiled. I felt like there was more for me to accomplish tonight. I wanted to push him over the edge again.

"I want to make you..." I said, hesitating the end of the sentence.

"Make me what, Nes?" he smiled.

I touched his face; showing him cum at my hand in the shower.

"I want to make _you_ do that," he whispered in my ear, while his naked body and hardness pushing into the side of my leg.

_Did he mean sex? Were we going to do that? How else would I do that? It isn't that easy for women, is it?_

"Let me try, ok" he whispered again.

All I could do was nod very slightly. I was kind of in shock. The next little while was a blur. Jake shifted down my shorts, and I kicked them off. _I guess this was it; Jake was going to make love to me._ I knew I wanted more, I knew I needed him, and no other, but part of me was nervous, but at that point, my want was greater.

Jake slipped his fingers inside of me again. His motion became rhythmic; he rubbed my nerves as he slid out of me. There was a building feeling that made me want to squirm, but I didn't. After a few moments Jake began to just pay attention to my sensitive ball of nerves. Moments later I felt like the tension that was building inside of me was pulsating and boiling over. Just as I felt some sort of release and pleasure take over my body, Jake slipped his fingers inside of me. A whining noise released from my mouth, I felt like every muscle in my body tensed and released and everything inside of me flowed away. This feeling lasted only a few seconds, and I was unaware of my body movements, my facial expressions and any noises I may have made in those few seconds. My head lay back on the pillow and my breathing was heavy. I don't think I could have opened my eyes if I wanted to.

"How did you know how to do that?"

"I told you, I listen to your body. You don't know how expressive you are."

After months of kissing and touching, Jake had learnt what I love without me saying a word, but to know the buttons to push was something I couldn't have explained if I tried. I was kind of embarrassed for him to see me that way, but it felt too good to care.

"I loved it," he said, and his mouth filled mine. _That made two of us._

His arms slid underneath me, cradling me, and his mouth slid back down to my chest, his kissing was hard to believe. He rose up to my neck, and then again to my mouth. As he slid his body up, I felt him touch my center, but this time, not with his hand. Jake slid right between my legs. The head of his penis was sitting at my entryway, and with one movement from either of us, we would become one. His breathing halted and was broken when it returned... Our eyes locked. I knew I could do this with him. I knew no one would ever love me more, and I don't think I could ever feel more for anyone.

Jake patted my hair, and glided his hand down my face. _This is it; this is where he asks me if it's ok. This is where it happens and we become one..._ I could hear my heavy breathing in my head.


	12. Chapter 12

And then he spoke, "I want to" I already knew that

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There was silence for a few moments.

"I _want_ to," he whispered, and I thought he did. "I love you more than anything" he went on. I nodded and smiled, but swallowed hard. So this was it, _hold your breath for a second… it's going to hurt, right?_

"But I can't…. we cant do this."

"Ok," I was hesitant to speak, and my voice was shaky. _Did he not want me? Did I do something wrong? Should I have... I don't even know what I should have done._ My throat felt thick, like I wanted to cry, but I couldn't.

He shifted himself slightly so that he wasn't right at my entry point. I really didn't understand; _isn't this what people do that are in love?_ We have been kissing and touching for months and we've been in love for… well, forever.

"Your family wants us to wait, and I do as well."

"Ok. Why does my family know about our relationship?" I was annoyed that other people were making decisions for me. "I don't think anyone else really gets a say in this, except you and I. And if you don't want me this way, then…then that's fine." I swallowed hard and thick again.

"Nes, I do, can't you tell?"

"I thought I could." Turning my head away. The 'come-by-it-naturally' stubbornness was shinning through.

"There is no lack of wanting you here." Jake turned my head to face him. "I told you, it is the hardest thing in the world for me to stop, to not have you in every way I want to."

"You don't, obviously" I was annoyed with a lot of things now; my family, him, this situation.

"No," he kissed me and rolled off of me. "You know I do, we just can't." He lay beside me resting his head in his hand.

"Oh, let me guess, my dad's rubbed off on you and wants us to wait until we are married? Well, let me tell you; I do _not_ care about that." I snapped.

"No, your dad and I haven't talked about this; your mom and I have."

At least I knew my mom wouldn't pressure Jake to wait, but why were other people consulted before I was?

"Nes, they know we are going to be physical with each other, it is none of their business when we want to do this or not. But we aren't going to do this irresponsibly. I'm not prepared for this and neither are you. Your mom only told me to be safe because you are different."

"What do you mean?"

"The last thing we want is to have a child right now, with everything going on…so, so there are things that need to be done to prevent that." I was silent thinking about what he said; he was right.

"All your mom said was that the coven coming seems to think you are very fertile right now, and there are phases in a women life where they are more fertile, and apparently yours is now, so _we_ need to be careful. Your mom said that you will probably be fertile for a few years at a time, and not days a month like humans. I don't get it, and I don't want to get to into it. But I just know we need to be responsible."

"How would they know that? Why would she tell you and not me?"

"She doesn't want to scare you and she didn't think you would listen to her. The other concern is the sisters that are half-breeds are extremely fertile through certain years of their life and then not at all, and not a few days, like humans. Zafrina has been trying to track them and their plans as much as she can."

Zafrina was my mother's best friend outside of the family. She was like an aunt to me, and I knew she would do whatever she could to help protect me.

"The father won't let anyone but himself or the son mate with them, and they end up with deformed, crazy children, who they end up killing anyway. Zafrina won't interfere with them now, in case it causes suspicion; what they want to do to their people, is their business, in her eyes." The thought was sickening to me. _The people coming for me are monsters._

"This is why they are coming after you." Jake continued. "They need you, a different blood line, to procreate with; to create their idea of perfection. They are going to do this with or without your agreement. Could you imagine what they would do to you or your baby if that did happen?"

"Jake this is kind of heavy bed time talk." I was scared now and didn't want to talk about it anymore. "But, do you really think that?" I hesitated.

"I do. I'm sorry."

"I just want to be with you." He made me feel so good; I couldn't imagine not having sex with him.

"But you don't want to get married?" he smiled, teasing me now.

"Not as an excuse to be with you like that. We should do what _we_ want when _we_ are ready."

"I know this sounds terrible, but maybe we should talk to Carlisle about what he thinks."

"Grandpa will have nothing to do with this!" I spat out. _This guy knew how to ruin a mood; talk about her parents and her grandpa._

"But he might be able to give us some insight as to how to be careful, because Nes, I want you like that, more then you know, obviously." He rolled back on top of me, and I couldn't feel his hardness anymore, but the warmth of his body on top of me was almost as good.

"I just want to make you feel the way you make me feel, and you keep stopping me." I said.

"You make me feel amazing." He kissed me.

"Jake, you know what I mean." I was frustrated and pushed up on him.

"I know, I am sorry, I just get caught up in you. Don't worry about me, you do it for me." His smile was beaming. "What we did earlier was the best feeling ever for me too, you almost put _me_ over the edge."

"Don't you think it's hard to stop?" I asked. "It was right there, one movement…"

"Umm YES! It's hard for me to start, because I have to think about stopping."

"So you don't want to start anymore?" I teased him.

Once again, his lips slid in between mine and his hands travel down my arms. "I love you so much, I can't wait to not have to stop."

"Ok, so I understand that we can't do that, for a while anyway, and there was never any pressure before, but I do want to do that one day. Do you think it will always be out of the question?" I asked.

"I think it's a matter of when and not if, ok?" He left a trail of kisses down my neck. "We just need to find out how to be careful."

"Ok" I let my beautiful man devour me with his kisses. I wrapped my arms and legs around him.

"I really want to make you do that again though." He whispered in my ear as his hands skimmed down my body. I shivered with his touch. "This body is the hardest thing to resist, ever. Do you know that?"

I couldn't respond as I felt him harden again.

"Do you think clothes _on_ would help…" I asked. "I don't want to tempt you too much."

"Are you kidding? If you even think about putting clothes on, I will rip them to pieces."

"But you, like this" I rubbed my hands down his bare chest. "…makes me want you even more. I can't promise that I won't make you…" I didn't finish, but he knew what I meant.

"Good" he smiled and kissed me. We both giggled and I rolled into the nook he created with between his arm and body. I rested my head there and fell asleep.

I woke up naked and still beside Jake's warm body.

"Morning sleepyhead," he said kissing my head.

"What time is it?" I gradually opened my eyes to see Jakes brown skin.

"Nine-thirty"

"That's not that late." I stretched my arms above my head.

"We'll it kind of is, but _you_ kept us up so late last night"

"Me?"

"Don't you remember trying to take off my pajamas? You wouldn't give up."

"Oh then what happened to me?"

"You stripped yourself when you couldn't have your way with me….Always the exhibitionist, hey babe?" I felt Jake's leg, and I couldn't feel any clothes on him either, but I didn't want to peek beneath the blankets.

"Liar." I joked back at him

He paused and raised his eyebrows at me. "Ok, fine, you succeeded." He laughed.

"Me?" I asked again.

"I couldn't have stayed in these pajamas if I tried."

"Whatever, you loved it."

"I know." He squeezed me into his chest. We lay there for a little while in silence.

"Time to get up?" I asked.

"I think we should get started on our planning. I had some ideas last night."

"When last night? Weren't you kind of occupied last night? Or does that consume your mind while you're with me?" I laughed, pulling his body closer to me. I wasn't ready to move from this place.

"I couldn't sleep again." I knew he meant because of his dream.

"What happens in this dream?"

"I'm lost, I know I need to find you, but I can't. I'm in wolf form and searching a forest, but it's like you aren't mine anymore. Like, you don't want me to find you, or I am unable to. I'm panicking, and then I wake up."

"Well, just to ease your mind, that will never happen. Did you at least fall back to sleep?"

"Yup, finally a few hours ago"

"Hmmm. Are you ok?"

"Ya, ya, I'm fine."

"So what were your ideas?"

"I think we should write a few ideas down and then when it's time to go, and we have said our goodbyes we go through them and choose. I also think we should do the passport thing. I don't want to be stuck somewhere and not be able to get out of the country."

Jake searched the bottom of the bed for his pajama pants, and slid them on. He got out of bed and walked around to my side of the bed. He knelt on the floor beside me and kissed my cheek, "You know you can stay like that all day… or I could bring you a robe?"

"Good option, but I would like a robe." I didn't feel like being the exhibitionist he referenced earlier.

"Ok." He handed me the same robe from yesterday that was hanging on the bureau. Jake left the room and let me get sorted with my robe. I quickly brushed my teeth and put my hair up.

"If we get new passports, then someone will know our names, Jasper, mom, and the person that does them." I said walking into the kitchen where Jake was standing in front of the stove, scrambling eggs.

"I think that's ok. If we live as paperless a life as we can, then we will be ok." He said without turning to me.

"Ok, I'll talk to uncle Jasper today."

"We need to get a more realistic vehicle then some of the sports cars around here." He turned, holding the spatula in his hand he crossed his arms.

"You love the fast cars though." I said, as I sat pulled up the bar stool under the over-hanging counter.

"I know Nes, but I think regardless, we should head north; away from where they are coming from."

"So you want an SUV?"

"I think it would be best." He turned back to his eggs. "Snow, bad roads and whatever else"

"Ok, do you want to deal with that? My dad will probably want to do that with you. Also, we need to have a lot of cash. We don't want to have to pay for things with visa or debit or ATM's." Jake nodded at my points. "My mom can maybe do that for us."

"What about where we go? Do you want to stay on the road, or settle somewhere and make a temporary life?" he asked, turning back to the stove again.

"I would rather settle. What do you want?"

"I would rather settle too. I think moving around constantly would become annoying quickly, but it might make us safer. I guess we can cross that bridge when we get there."

I nodded.

"Did you think of anything else we should get goin' on?" I asked

"Maybe our story? No matter where we go, we will inevitably be around people, and we are going to have to have somewhat of a story established."

"Ok, I'll think about that. Maybe that's something my parents can help with too. I want to try to involve them as much as possible."

"Absolutely"

There were a few moments of comfortable silence as Jake finished making his breakfast. "So do you think you are going to talk to your grandpa about what we talked about?" he asked as he sat down beside me.

"I don't know, Jake, its really awkward."

"Well, you could ask your mom about being different than a human woman, and what she might know about that. I don't think you're going to have to get Carlisle to examine you."

"Ok, good. I don't think that is a bad idea. My mom wants me to 'open up' to her more often anyway."

Jake threw a few more bites into his mouth. "Did you want some?" he asked with a mouth full.

"It's a little late now, isn't it?" I laughed.

"Sorry" he said.

"It's ok, I am not hungry at all."

"Are you worried?" he asked.

"After our talk last night, I am a bit scared of what they want from me. These people are monsters."

"I know"

"Please don't keep anything from me anymore. If you think it will scare me, I don't care, tell me."

"You are just like your mom, you know that? Your dad use to keep things from her for her safety and I never use to get it, until now. But I promise, I wont keep things from you anymore. I will tell anyone else if they want to tell me things, that they will have to tell you, or I will."

"Ok, thanks Jake." I could tell he was scrambling a little, worried about me.

"I love you, you know?"

"I know. Thanks." I was distracted thinking about what was to come. I zoned out a little and thought about getting away as soon as possible. I didn't want any harm to come to anyone else. I didn't want to be without my parents, but I needed to start to be more serious and cautious about this.

I didn't notice Jake had gotten up and cleaned his plate.

"So I guess we should get started eh?" He asked.

"Yup." I was still phasing out.

"Ness, it's going to be fine. We get to create our own little life together for a little while. Think about it that way, as apposed to hiding. I wont put limits on what you want to do, or where you want to go, except that I have to be there." He smiled at me. I looked up at him and smiled back.

"Thanks Jake" he did make me feel better. "You always make me feel better. Let's get started on our day." I stood up and went to the bedroom to get my bathroom essentials. I knew the longer I sat there and thought about what my life would entail over the next, well I didn't know how long, the more worried and scared I would become.

**Please let me know what you think. **

**Am I doing ok giving them their own personalities? Do you like the story?**

**Thank you to **_**my**_** sis for editing for me… if there are errors – blame her…. ;)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks for the Reviews! Keep 'em coming!**

**The next few chapters are going to be lots of plot, but I will include some action here and there… ******

I grabbed my cell phone from the bedside table. I quickly dialed my home phone number.

"Hi Mom."

"Morning Nes."

"Jake and I have a few things we need help with, and some ideas to bounce off you, is it ok if we come over?"

"Of course honey, when were you thinking?"

"Now."

"Oh, is everything ok?"

I guess I did sound a bit anxious. "Yeah, we just want to get started on things."

"See you soon then."

"Bye" I flipped my phone closed and went back out to the kitchen where Jake was already changed and writing some notes to himself.

"Whatchadoin?" I dragged out.

"Just writing some notes to myself so I don't forget. I have so many things to think about, I don't want to forget, so I thought lists would be a smart idea."

"Whatever works" I kissed the top of his head and rested my hands on his shoulders. "I called my mom and they are ready for us to come over now."

"Sounds good. Do you want a coat or anything, it looks like it's going to rain."

"No? Rain in Forks? I wouldn't believe it, especially in November."

"Wow, it's November already? The last few months have flown by."

"I know it seems like last week we were in the heat wave." (

"Best few months ever though." Jake stood up and put his big hands around my waist and lifted me up to his eye level to kiss him. He gently put me down and went to get his own rain coat.

As I walked towards the door something hit me in the arm, I looked down to see my rain coat. "Put it on, it's going to rain." Jake said, and I laughed as I put it on.

Jake was right; rain drops began to fall on our short walk, but by the time we got in the door and took off our coats it was full-on raining.

We were greeted by my mom, and we all made our way to the kitchen. It was always the gathering place when we were at their house.

"So, we talked a bit last night and had a few ideas where we need some help." I began.

"We don't want to tell you a lot, and we totally understand why, but we are thinking that if we want to head in the direction that they are not coming from, we need a more practical vehicle." Jake jumped in. He seemed very responsible, and organized, he even had his list with him.

"I think that's fair. What were you thinking?" my dad asked leaning against the kitchen counter.

"I suggested an SUV of some sort, but I don't know much, maybe you and Jake can go to find something." I suggested.

"No time like the present" my dad said. "Do you want to head into Tacoma or Seattle? Or there are great auto malls in Everett."

"Either way Ed, where ever you think is best."

"What did I tell you about calling me Ed?" my dad smirked at Jake.

"Well I am not calling you dad." Jake said with a chuckle, and we all laughed.

"Let's get out of here." My dad said, fighting the laughter. "Was there anything else you needed Nes before I go?"

"No Dad, we can talk about fitting in with humans another time. No rush on that."

"Somehow I think you'll be fine in that department anyway." My dad said kissing my mom on the check. She touched his face and closed her eyes as she did. "Love you girls."

Jake winked at me as they headed out.

"How was your night sweetheart?" my mom asked. We were sitting at the kitchen table together.

"It was good, but mom, why did you talk to Jake about stuff and not me? You want me to be more open with you, but it goes both ways."

"I know, I am sorry. I knew he would talk to you about it, someday, but I guess you and I need to have a conversation if you two are talking about sex."

"Mom, no, we were talking about why these people want me. Why didn't you tell me Zaphrina was helping us either?"

"I don't want you to worry about it too much, but I want you to take this seriously, its hard to find that balance."

"Well I know now." I interrupted.

"Good. Nes, there are some weird people in this alternative life we have. It is scary and sometimes really inhumane, and I wanted to shield you from that for a while. But I know we don't have any choice now."

I nodded. "Thank you. But when did Zaphrina get involved?"

"She already knew before Alice told us. She was trying to get to a phone, but you know her; she doesn't exactly carry a cell phone, or have accessible Internet. She ended up getting to a phone two weeks (ago?) and has been updating us when she can."

"Ok, well its good to know we have someone on our side who can watch out for us."

There were a few minutes of silence.

"So how much detail did Jake go into? I know when I told him he looked quiet confused. I forget he never had a woman in his life through his teen years."

"He told me what you told him. I think I get it mom, but Jake thinks maybe grandpa can help to let me know if he thinks my cycle will be for years, and not days."

"Its not your cycle Nes, its your ovulation. It's the time when you are most likely to get pregnant. Zaphrina and Charlisle have heard the same thing, that the sisters are fertile for a few years. They almost make it seem like they are meant to procreate. How they know this, I don't know."

"Do you think I'm the same?"

"I don't know sweetie. Probably. If you want to be like that with Jake you have to be careful. The birth control pill will probably not work on you; like most drugs, they don't seem to have any affect on you. But I can ask Grandpa about that for you."

"Mom, I don't think it's worth the risk anyway." Last night I did, but I didn't want my mom to be too involved.

"You are going to think that it is, I can promise you that. You will probably start to feel very, umm, frustrated, might be the right word especially because you are probably ovulating all the time."

"Mom" I whined.

"You don't know that yet, maybe you do, all I want is for you to be careful, regardless. Even if it isn't an immediate issue in your relationship, it will be, and it is wonderful, and beautiful, and you'll love it, but just be safe."

"Agreed" I wanted this conversation to be over.

"I know this is uncomfortable, but be happy it's me and not your dad. Charlie tried to talk to me about it, while your dad giggled his way home."

"Ugg Papa, really? That's awful. Dad could hear him thinking about it? Oh gawd!" I laughed. _Ok so it could be worse_. "Mom, honestly, I think we are a ways away from that yet"

"I am still going to look into it, and I'll let you know, otherwise, use a condom."

"Mom, cmon. I know."

"Ok, I am done here."

"So can you talk to uncle Jasper about re-newing the passports you had for us before. I think different last names this time though. Jake and I are going to be a couple, but not a married couple."

"Ok, what else?"

"Get an emergency Visa in Jake's new name."

"Done, what else?"

"Money."

"You want me to start hording cash for you?"

"Yup."

"Already started." She smiled.

"You seem like you have done this before mom. "

"Well I almost had to send you away, remember?"

"I do, but it's different now."

"I know, I can't decide which is harder… I know you will always be safe with Jake, I just worry."

"It is going to be fine mom."

"I know sweetie, that's what Grandma says, 'think positive,' but its difficult because it's you; you're mine." The bond between my mom and I was unique, she totally understood the human side of me.

"I know dad can help me blend in with humans, but what do you think? How different am I? How should I act? Can I make friends?"

"Oh Nes, you wont have any trouble. The biggest issue is not to move too fast or use your ability on humans, and DO NOT tell anyone anything. I think it would be great for you to make friends, join book clubs, or get a part time job; whatever you want, but be casual about everything. Be yourself, but forgettable, do you know what I mean?"

"Try not to stand out?"

"I know it will be hard, but read other people and try to be just like them, or as much as you can."

"Ok, that's good mom, thanks"

"Do you want Aunt Alice to take you shopping for some clothes and supplies?"

"No, but will you do it with me?" I hadn't had any alone time with my mom lately and knew she needed it as much as I did.

"Sure sweetie, I don't mind shopping as much when I'm with you."

"Lets get going so we will be back before dark. We should go into South Center, that way we don't have to go right into Seattle."

"Ok"

We drove in quickly, even though it was raining, my mom's Mercedes cruised. She retired the Ferrari my dad had gotten her years ago; too much for her. We actually shopped all day, which was rare for both of us. We got the practical stuff for my 'trip' like warmer clothes, rain gear, uggs (even though my dad hates them), and we went all out with other stuff too. My mom and I got some really nice jeans and sweaters, and she bought some 'sleepware' at Victoria's secret. She didn't suggest I get anything but underwear and pajamas. It has always been uncomfortable for me to bra shop with my mom, since I surpassed her size last year. She always laughed at me, and never made me feel uncomfortable, but did suggest underwear outside of the normal cotton thongs.

We bought Jake some clothes too, even though he was always warm, we knew he would need to blend in more while we were away so we stocked him up with plain long-sleeved shirts, cargo pants, sweaters, jeans; really simple stuff.

"I really like how Jake has never cared about labels or looks, a little different then the Cullen's hey?" my mom laughed handing the teller her Visa in Nordstroms.

"I know, but he always looks so good" slipped out of my mouth.

My mom laughed as she took the bag from the sales lady and said her thank you.

"Well, you made her commission for the month" I said to my mom as we walked away.

"Try to help out where I can" she winked at me. "You done?"

"Kind of."

"We should get back soon anyway. You dad and Jake will be home soon, maybe call them to see how they did."

"When we get to the car, my hands are kind of full right now" I said lifting the bags. We laughed together. I knew then, even more than before, how much I was going to miss my mom.

When we got back to the car we threw everything in the back seat and sped home. The silent hum of the car and my dad's classical music playing put me to sleep. I only woke up two miles outside Forks. The sound of my mom's phone buzzing woke me.

'Yup, we're almost there…. Oh, you did?... ya, I think she will… I bet he is" She laughed…. "Ok, great." She laughed again and said her usual I-love-you before hanging up.

"What did dad say?"

"He told me he got you guys a new car. They were debating between two, but your dad splurged a little. He hopes you are going to like it. Jasper is jealous, he loves it."

"I don't even know how to drive, I am sure it will be fine. Did he say if Jake likes it?"

"Oh I am sure he does. But knowing Jake, he would have been happy with anything as long as it has four wheel drive."

She was right, I smiled to myself. I knew Jake and I were going to be alright while we were away. I knew I never had to be anyone but myself, and that was the best feeling about this whole thing.

We pulled into the driveway, the rain was pouring down, but Grandma, Alice, Jasper, Jake and my dad were standing next to our new truck. We drove my mom's car into the garage and jumped out. I was really excited to see it, I couldn't tell what kind it was, but it was really nice. It was dark grey and looked really expensive.

"Leave the bags, I'll get your dad to grab them." My mom said.

I threw my rain coat on and ran over to get a closer look.

"Do you like it?" my dad said.

"It's really nice. Where did you guys go?"

"We ended up in Seattle."

"Any idea what kind it is Nes?" Jake teased. He knew I didn't' know.

"I can read, it says Range Rover on the front." I smirked back at him.

"Get in Nes, see if you like it" my dad said opening the passenger door. I sat in the black leather seats. The dash was beautiful; it did have all the bells and whistles… well, at least as far as I could tell.

"Did you drive it Jake?"

He jumped in the drivers seat. "Ya, it is so nice. Your dad went overboard, but actually negotiated a few extras for no extra cost."

"Female sales lady?" I joked.

"Surprisingly no, but I think the guy liked him a little too much. They were talking Aston martins for forty freakin minutes." We all laughed, including my dad.

"What did you guys get up to?" Jake asked.

"We did some good shopping today too, nothing like this, but it was great." I looked at my mom under my dad's arm smiling. She whispered in his ear.

"Lets's see?" my dad said. I can only imagine what she said to make him say that. I rolled my eyes at jake. He silently laughed.

"We are going to get the bags, why don't you take it for a ride." My mom said. "I'll make dinner for Jake, you hungry Nes?"

"Sure"

"We won't be long" Jake said as he turned on his new car.

"Bye. Thanks dad"

"My pleasure." He smiled at me and waved as I shut the door.

"So what do you think?" I asked as we pulled out of the driveway.

"It's over the top, but so nice."

" I got you some clothes for our trip." I told him.

"Nes, you didn't have to do that."

"I know, but I wanted to. My mom and I were having such a good time; we just went all out. I don't think I have ever shopped like that. I literally couldn't have carried more bags."

"That's good. I am glad you had fun with you mom. I missed you though." Jake slid his hand over to my lap link his fingers in mine.

"You going to teach me how to drive one of these days?"

"Depends, what you gonna do for me?" I felt my checks rise as I turned to look at Jake. His smirk was irresistible. I slid out of my seat, I had never put on a seatbelt, so I easily climbed over to him. I kissed down hi neck. I pulled back his t-shirt to kiss the top of his shoulder. "That's a start I guess, but I really don't want to crash this new car on the first day."

"Always stopping me, is that your new thing?" I said sitting back in my seat. Jake looked at me straight faced. "Jake, I'm kidding." I smiled.

"Ok, good, because if you weren't you were going to get it."

"Oh really, get it how?" I teased.

"I'll show you… later"


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you for the reviews… I hope you like this chapter**

"Later eh? You think I am sleeping over again?" I darted back at him, smirking.

"Don't act like you don't want to. Nes." He emphasized my name.

"You should be so lucky. Jake." I did the same back to his name.

"You're right, I would be lucky. You gonna?" he laughed.

"You wish"

"I do wish, will you? I'll be really nice if you do." He sung out his barter.

"I'll see. I do feel bad for not staying with my parents. It wont be long before I don't have that option."

"You're right. But do you think they would care if I stayed with you?"

I shrugged my shoulders. It would be different, but really nice to have both of the two things I wanted. "It wouldn't be like our nights at your house."

"Really, because I thought your dad would totally be ok with hearing our thoughts through our bedtime ritual."

"Ritual? What do you mean?"

"I can't not kiss you and hold you at night time now." He squeezed my hand. "You've opened Pandora's box you know?" he laughed turning the car back towards the house.

I stared out the window, and then at the dashboard and the GPS, the seat warmers, and a whole bunch of other buttons I didn't know how to use.

"This car is really nice, you guys did a good job picking. Seriously though, will you teach me how to drive?"

"Probably not, I don't think women are allowed to drive in Canada."

"Canada? What are you talking about, women could vote in Canada before they could in the US."

"You sure about that?"

"Jake! I really want to learn."

His laughter filled the car. He knew how to bug me.

We pulled the car into the driveway. "Canada, really?"

"It is north and the biggest country in the world… I think anyway. Wouldn't be the worst thing if you parents knew we were thinking of it because it is so big."

"Lets still try not to think about it."

"Ya, you're right." Jake put the car into park and came around to open my door. Chivalry made me feel uncomfortable, but it was cute the way Jake picked up out of the car. "I am going to run down to see Sam quickly."

"Right now?"

"I have a few things to talk to him about. I haven't really updated him on things, and I kind still feel like I have to, since I don't have Billy any more. I also want to ask for his help."

"I thought you were coming for dinner?" I looked straight into his eyes, he was still holding me around the waist, and my feet were over a foot from the ground when I was eye level with him.

"I am, I am going to be quick" He kissed me. "That's what I was missing all day." He took a deep breath and kept his eyes closed as he pulled away; lingering in our kiss. A smile raised on both of our cheeks. "Lets walk to your parents, and then I'll go."

"I can go from here, you don't have to walk me." I said as he put me down.

"I know, but I want to." I kind of thought Jake was going to worry about me alone in the forest, but didn't want to seem like he was being over-protective. Either way I gladly accepted his company.

We walked slowly with our hands linked. "I am going to phase to get down there quickly, so maybe we can start our talk before I even get there…."

"Ok, ill see you soon. I keep a plate hot for you."

"You don't have to do that."

"I know." I smiled, looking into his deep brown eyes. As we approached the house, I stopped and faced him. I reached my arms up around his neck and stood on the tip of my toes, but still needed a little lift to reach his lips; he raised me up to his face. I held the kiss a little longer then normal. I slid my lips between his and grazed my tongue into his mouth. His hands wrapped tighter around my waist, pulling me into him. I finally pulled away and he set me down.

"You doing that so I'll hurry back?" he asked.

"Maybe" I smiled. "Also, because I wont be able to when you get back. At least like _that_ anyway."

"Why, your parents can probably see us from here." He pointed towards the house. I could see them in the kitchen, which meant if they wanted to, they could have seen us too. I knew they would have heard us, and my mom and us probably told my dad to ignore us.

"Oh well" I jumped up into Jake again and kissed him goodbye. He laughed and set me down again.

"Bye." I said, and before I knew it he was off and running.

I walked in the door at my parents' house. _My parents' house._ I repeated to myself, it sounded so funny.

"It's your house too," my dad said alone in the kitchen setting some food on the counter.

"I know dad, sorry." He smiled at me.

"Did Jake go down to see Sam?"

"Yup" I popped the P as I sat down at the kitchen table. "Thanks again for the car dad, it's really nice."

"I hope it suits you guys well." I felt a little tension from my dad.

_You ok? _

"Ya, it just takes a little to get use to the idea of not having you around. You are more then I could have ever hoped for. I never thought I would have a child, and then, 8 years later, you are an adult, having your own life, and in danger, nonetheless."

_Aww, dad, you're softening in your old age. Lighten up, I don't want to worry about that now._

"I know." He rolled his eyes. I laughed at him a little. He was being cute.

_It's going to be fine dad. Jake will take care of me, and it's not like you guys are going anywhere. When we come back, everything will be back to normal._

"I know sweetheart, you are right. You think I would be use to changes happening so fast with you as my daughter, but I'm not. But I am happy that you are happy. Your mom said I don't seem like I am happy for you two, and I am. I said this already, but I am so thankful that Jake imprinted on you, and that you feel… for him back."

_I know dad thanks. I know it must be hard to hear our thoughts, and I apologize if you hear things you shouldn't. _ I had to try really hard not to think of any physical acts between Jake and I.

My dad laughed. "It's ok, it's not that bad, I have had to live with Uncle E for years remember.." we laughed together. My dad was starting to treat me like an adult more and more. It was really nice.

The father-daughter moment ended when my mom walked in the room in her new jeans.

"Do you like them?" she asked turning from side to side, looking at my dad with cute eyes.

"They're great! I love it when you actually shop." he smiled. He went over and tapped her on the bum.

"They look _really_ good." She giggled. "What else did you get?" he asked, holding my mom now. He spoke to her like no one else was in the room. _More people should be so lucky._

"I'll show you." My mom was feeling gregarious, and she bounced back into her bedroom.

"You are that lucky Nes. I see it. I know you don't when it's yourself. When you are in a room, no one else even exists to him." my dad said as he sat down at the table with me.

I barely had a second to process my dad's comment before my mom was back out in a beautiful long sweater.

"Nes picked out this sweater. I got it in a few colors. I can wear it with jeans, and she made me buy these leggings." She snapped the black tights "I don't know if I like them, but they are comfortable." My mom said as she stood in front of my dad.

"No, I like the leggings. They look _really _good." He smiled up at her devilishly, rubbing down her leg at the same time.

"Oh, dad, guess what I bought?" I laughed.

"What?"

"Your favorite; uggs."

"Uhh, really?" my mom and I both laughed at his response. His eyes rolled at us. "I just don't understand them. God please, don't wear them with a jean skirt."

I kept laughing. "Where I am going, I don't think skirts will be in the cards." I smiled trying not to think of where to go. "I bought them because they were practical and warm."

He shook his head smiling.

My mom continued the fashion show.

"What's in that pink bag?" my dad asked of the Victoria's Secret signature striped pink bag.

"Bed time clothes" my mom said casually. She sat down in her final outfit; comfy velour pants, we both bought a pair, and a tank top.

_Like as if I don't know you guys don't actually sleep at night._ I rolled my eyes at my dad. He laughed and stood up and kissed her neck and rubbed his hands on her shoulders.

"You know you don't need them Bella, but I am all for impulse buys." He smiled down at her. "I guess I'll check those out later then?" he chuckled.

They have always been fairly open about their love and physical relationship, I mean its not like they do anything in front of me, but I don't think they can help it. Their love transcends into everything they do.

"I am happy you guys have each other. I am really happy you have shown me what love and relationships are about." I said out loud, without even thinking about it.

"Aww, Nes, that is so nice." My mom said. My dad just smiled at me; he was happy I said that out loud. He heard me speak like that all the time in my head.

"You're not trying, and that's the best part. Even though I have to go for a while, I'll be back and I know you guys will be the same." _It's reassuring. _I said to my dad.

He just nodded. They looked at each other and smiled.

"We should start on dinner." I didn't want to linger on the sappiness anymore.

"I am cooking this time. How hungry are you?" my mom asked as she stood up.

"I am ok."

"Ok, well if Jake has gone to La Push, and this take a little longer." My mom thought out loud. "How about enchiladas?"

"Sounds fine to me."

"What else did you get Nes?" my dad asked as my mom got to work.

"I got the same pants that mom has on, jeans, a jacket, necessities, and we got Jake some warmer clothes."

"What about me? Did I get anything?"

"I got you something" my mom said.

"Oh right." He smiled at her.

"Are you keeping up with your school stuff Nes?" my dad changed the subject quickly.

"Not really. But I sleep dad. There are only so many hours a day I can." _I don't want to think about school dad. Cmon._

"Nes, you want things to be normal, I am giving your normal. Get on top of it." He said firmly.

"Dad, I'll take a ton of stuff with me when I go away. Maybe I could even enroll in school as soon as I get back"

"We will probably move soon too. The family has been here a long time now, longer than anywhere else. It's almost to the point where we have to hide, and Carlisle is moving hospitals already anyway his last day in Forks is next week."

"Oh" I was shocked, a lot more was changing then I thought. "What about Papa?" I felt really bad; I hadn't seen him at all lately.

"Papa can't come with us Nes." My mom said. "We can visit though. And I will be doing

so a lot, so you can too." She turned to face me.

"So somewhere close by maybe?" I asked.

"We don't know yet. Your grandma is looking into real estate right now."

"So everything will be different when I come back?"

"Probably, but you will be different too." My dad said.

"But, please come home Nes." My mom persisted.

"Of course I will mom. I am not going anywhere once this whole thing is over." _How could she even question that?.. _"Mom, I love my life with you and our family."

"I just worry that you might like being away. That we haven't let you see more of the real world." She went on.

"Don't worry Mom. Honestly. There is nothing I am going to like about being away, but I know why I have to."

"Ok" she said turning back to the counter. She didn't sound convinced.

"Why don't you show me your stuff" my dad said. Trying to change the subject.

"Ok" I went to my room where my dad and mom had put my shopping bags and carried a few out. I left my underwear bag in my room as well.

I went through my stuff with my dad and he seemed really into it. He just liked seeing everyone happy, and I think he wanted the normalcy as much as I did. Time seemed to fly by when I talked with my dad.

"Dinner is almost ready, do you think we should wait for Jake?" my mom asked. I looked at the clock. It had been almost two hours.

"I don't think he would want me to wait, but I am not really that hungry yet, so I'll wait if that's ok.."

"Alice is here," he said. Not two minutes later she walked in the door. My dad got tense.

"They're coming, now" she said once she shut the door behind her. Her expression was serious and scary.

"What do you mean by _now_?" my dad edged forward on the couch.

Alice paused. "Now means now. They are leaving South America, now. Did Zafrina indicate this to you Bells?"

"She hasn't called in a few days" my mom bit her lip. "..and I don't have a number for her."

"It doesn't mean they are going to be here immediately. There plan is still to get as many 'believers' or 'followers' as they can on there was here. Jasper still has some contacts in the south, so he is going to try to ask them to intercept or at least tell us when they reach the states."

"We can't expect people to fight for us, especially those who don't practice our lifestyle."

"What about all the people that came when I was a baby? Where are they? Wont they protect us? What about the Vultori?"

"They Vultori respect us, but probably wouldn't be out of sorts if something happened to us. Especially since the powers we possess." He paused. "Jake's almost here. I want to see what Sam has to say." He rubbed his hands on his temple and reached for his wedding ring; the clear indicator of him being anxious.

_Dad, it's ok, we are going to be prepared. Jake already has some ideas. _

"Don't think about them" he snapped. I sat back on the couch immediately.

"Edward" my mom scolded.

"I am sorry, I just can't know anything." Just then Jake walked through the door.

"Hey guys, everything ok?" Jakes asked casually but out of breath.

"Not really, they're coming." Alice said as she looked at him. She scrunched her nose a little at his smell. She obviously hadn't been around him a lot lately to be immune to his smell like we were.

"Oh." He said putting his head down.

"What did Sam say?" my dad asked restlessly.

"He can't. He loves Nes, but he cant leave his own family for this. He will step in if it comes here, but besides that, he wont. I can't say that he is disappointed that you guys are planning to move either. I don't blame him; Emily is having twins, and they already have 3 kids."

"What about Leah and Seth?" My dad asked. He knew they would be the most likely to help Jacob.

"Leah has moved on. Leah finally imprinted and is happy, she wants to age and move on. I don't blame her for moving away. Seth can't do it alone, although I know he would."

"I already talked to Emmett and Rosalie, they are going to try to intercept. They are going to meet Peter and Charlotte and try to track them. Peter is a really good tracker, and I think if they intercept before Nahuel and his father's group become too large, they will be fine."

"Would Seth join them do you think Jake?" my dad asked again, panicking a little._ Calm down dad._ He took a deep breath and I touched his leg.

"I think he would. You know that kid always wants some action… but do you think Rose would be ok traveling with him?"

"At this point, I don't think Rose would care, or have a say really." Alice said. "Listen, Jasper is trying to get more of his contacts on board to meet up with Peter. We have an 'in' with more vampires because he doesn't practice our lifestyle. I think most of the breed has common sense that you can't just make a claim on someone, unless they make the choice to join Nahuel's coven and buy their 'super-race' idea..."

"Can't you see that?" my dad asked of her power.

"Edward, I can't see every single person's thought or decision." Alice all but yelled.

"Ok, sorry. So as long as their group doesn't get much larger than 10-12, we will be ok. Zafrina will meet up with them, you think Bella?"

" I don't know if I can ask her to leave her family again."

"She will." Alice confirmed. "You two should make your move soon, and our family is going to have to do the same. Esme found a property in Oregon. It's not as raining, but not any sunnier either."

I looked to Jake and he cracked a half nervous smile to me.

"Do you know where Jasper got to with Jason?" my mom asked.

"Who's Jason?" my dad asked.

"The passport contact." My mom responded.

"I didn't know you were on first name basis," he said sarcastically.

"Edward, this isn't the time to be funny or jealous, whatever it is, stop it." She snapped. The tension was getting to everyone, so no one blamed them for cracking a little.

Alice smirked turning her face from my dad and I, to my mom. " I know he put in the request and paid for a rush today." She handed me a letter. "This has some information on it. Don't share it with anyone but Jake, I didn't even read it, it's from Jasper."

"Thanks." I said as she handed me a sealed envelope.

"Jake, don't stand in the door way, come in, and make up a plate." My mom said.

"Thanks Bells" Jake slipped off his shoes and walked barefoot into the kitchen. He touched my mom's shoulder as he passed her. We could all tell she was upset, and would have been crying if she could.

"So as soon as the passports get here, you guys will be off. " Alice said the obvious. "I will ask Jasper to call in the morning. J. is frightened of him, so I think we can have these back within a few days."

"Thanks for everything Alice." My mom said.

"Ya, thanks Aunty Alice."

"You could have re-paid me by taking me shopping today." She laughed and lightened the mood.

"Sorry Aunty" I said.

"It's ok sweety. But I do have some stuff for you, and if you go again before you leave; tell me. I am going to miss shopping for you, and having you around for that matter."

I smiled at her. "I'm going back to the house to find out more about where the new place is and find out if Jasper has made any progress with Peter's contacts."

My dad stood up and hugged Alice, he didn't normally hug anyone but my mom, and me and now that I think of it, I had never seen him hug aunty Alice. Her face was stunned, but she hugged him back. He whispered a thank you in her ear.

"Talk to you in the morning" regardless of the weight of a situation, she always bounced and exuded happiness.

My mom broke a few moments of thought and silence. " I am going to tell Charlie you are going to boarding school."

"That's a good idea" my dad said. He stood up and walked over to her. He put his arm around her stiff body and kissed her ear. He was trying to ease her and apologize.

I just nodded. I didn't want to say goodbye to Papa. I loved him so much.

"Ill call Seth in the morning. I know he'll be into it." Jake sat in front of his plate of untouched food.


	15. Chapter 15

_**Thanks for the reviews, keep em coming!!**_

We went about the rest of our night fairly regularly, considering the news.

"Nes, will you go with me to see Charlie in the morning?" my mom asked.

"Of course mom."

"Ok, good" she let out a sigh. "I am going to lay down…it's been a long day. I need to close my eyes for a while." She sadly smiled at me and Jake sitting on the couch playing a game of War with two decks of cards. Jake always liked to change games in some way.

"You staying here or at Jakes sweeties?" she said on her way through the kitchen.

"Here" I said.

"You too Jake?" she knew we didn't want to be apart.

"Is that ok Bells?"

"Sure, ill tell Edward" she seemed spaced out and even tired. I had never seen her so out of it.

Jake looked at me and smiled. He raised his eyebrows at me twice; making me laugh. "Jake" I laughed.

"What?" he asked naively.

"Stop it with my dad is only down the hall." He had gone to his back room to play the piano; a relax-er for him. I heard the piano stop. "Oh great, he's going to come in here give me the sex talk now." I said, Jake silently laughed.

"Night guys, I am going to join mom" he called from the hallway.

"Night" we said in unison.

"No, I think he is going to give your mom a sex something else, maybe not a talk…but…" Jake raised his eyebrows again with a smirk on his face the whole time. I put my cards down and leaned forward to kiss him. I pulled away and he pulled me back, I practically fell into him. He ran his nose down my neck and breathed me in and kissed my collarbone. I began to feel hot and excited, and frustrated immediately. I thought of my mom calling it frustrated earlier. _Did she mean horny?_

"Who gave you a sex talk today" Jake asked as he pulled away.

"My mom went into a little more detail then you did last night"

"Whoa, that sounds bad." Jake was being particularly silly. "Shh," he said reminding me that my parents could probably hear us.

"Not like that." I laughed. "She just said to be safe because apparently I am ovulating, all the time." Jake scrunched his eyes. "I know you don't get it, but it's the time where you can get pregnant in a month; I am that way, all the time. Another one of my gifts, I guess. She wasn't that awkward about it, but I am happy we don't have to talk about it again"

"So you're not going to ask your Grandpa about it?"

"No, but my mom is. She knows we are going to be away together, and as much as I told her we aren't there, yet, she thinks we will be. She doesn't think the pill will work on me, so she is going to ask my grandpa, so I guess this topic isn't over yet, urrg"

Jake leaned into my ear. "We aren't there yet?" he whispered his question very quietly. He pulled back and gave me a smile and I smirked back shaking my head.

"Apparently not" I smiled bigger then before. "We need to stop thinking about this," I whispered.

"It's hard," he said.

"What is?" I looked down at his waist.

"Nes!" he laughed. "So do you want to keep playing cards?"

"I don't care." I titled my head smiling at him. I wanted him to kiss me again. "Do you want to go out for a walk?" I raised my eyebrows at him, smiling.

"Nes, its my first night staying with you, I don't want to get in trouble, plus if your parents heard us leave or got up from whatever they are doing and we are gone, I think your dad will have a heart attack, even if it is impossible."

"OhhhKaaayy" I said, I leaned into his chest and he pulled me into him.

"We are going to have plenty of alone time coming up, even sooner then we thought."

"What a day?" I said as I yawed.

"I know," he said rubbing his hands down my hair.

"Let's get to bed, tomorrow will be just as busy, I am sure."

I sat up from the couch and headed to the bathroom, which was next to my parents room. I could hear them kissing and mumbles of conversation. My hearing wasn't quite as good as my parents, but it was good enough to hear what I didn't always want to. At least my dad wasn't focusing on what Jake and I were talking about.

I brushed my teeth and washed my face. I went into my bedroom to get pajamas. Jake was right behind me in the doorway. "Whoa, you _did_ go shopping." He saw all the bags of clothes. "What is in there?" he pointed to the pink bag.

"I have heard that question already today"

"Do I want to know?" he asked

"My dad asking my mom, so no, I don't think you do." I grabbed for my pajamas.

"I'll go use the bathroom, you get changed in here." He said, and shut the door. I quickly got changed into a tank top and shorts. I knew it would temp him more then needed, but I wanted to feel his warm body tonight if I couldn't touch it the way I wanted to. _Stop thinking this way._

I went through a few bags so I could show Jake what I got him. A few more minutes went by when I realized I couldn't hear him. I turned to the door and I had left it closed, he didn't think he could come in yet. I opened it, and he was leaning against the wall across from my door.

"Sorry, I thought you would have just come in."

"It's ok" he smiled, looking at my body.

"You don't have pajamas?" I asked.

"No, I can sleep in shorts though."

"It's a good thing I bought you pants today, because I don't think wearing shorts all the time will work outside of Forks…. Do you want to see what I got you?"

"Sure." he sat on the edge of my bed as I scrambled through a few more bags. I looked up at Jake and his eyes were bulging. "You got me all of that?" looking at the pile of clothes I was created from the bags.

"Ya, is that ok?"

"Nes, it's fine, but you don't have to do that."

"I know, but I want to. You take care of me, why can't I take care of you? Isn't that what relationships are?"

"They are, but it doesn't have to be about money, I am fine with_ plain_ t-shirts."

"I know you are, and _plain _short sleevedt-shirts are fine here. But if we are going north, they wont be, you need long sleeves to blend in. Honestly, what are a few extra bucks here and there for my family? They don't care, why would you?"

"You just gave me a good idea for our story."

"Oh, really" I leaned in. "Tell me"

"I'm going to wait, it's bad enough in _my_ head." he stood up walked over to my desk. He pulled out his piece of paper and wrote a few things down and returned his seat on my bed.

"Anyway, sorry Nes. Thanks for the stuff, its great."

"You haven't even seen it yet."

"Ok" he sat back down on my bed looking down at me on the floor.

"Before we get started, can you put a t-shirt on?" he rubbed his forehead and eyes. "I can see right down your tank top and I don't want your dad to hear what I am thinking right now."

I smiled and went to the closet to put on a t-shirt. I returned to the floor going through the shirts, jacket, and pants with him. He really liked it, although I don't think he would have said if he didn't. He really didn't care about material things. I showed him some of my stuff too. He smiled at my excitement.

"You tired now?" I asked him

"Ya, I feel like_ I_ went shopping." He smiled. "Thanks again. I wanna see some of that stuff on you….But you didn't show me that bag" pointing at the pink bag again.

I softly sat down on the bed and crawled behind Jake. My bed was against a wall, and nowhere near as big as his king size, but it was perfect for me, and was going to be a close cuddle for both us. I got into the side of the bed closest to the wall, so that I could see the door.

"Do you really want to see that stuff with my dad next door?"

"Guess your right."

"Some other time" I said.

"Promise?" he asked looking back and down at me. I knew it was just underwear, nothing too exciting, but I loved that he wanted me that way. I nodded and smiled up at him. "Do you want me to close the door?" he asked.

"No, leave it open a little bit, I think it would make my parents feel better."

"Your right." Jake undid the top button of his shorts and pulled his shirt over his head. His brown wide back was so beautiful…he pulled the covers back and laid into bed with me. He lay on his back, but put his arm out to me and I rested my head on his chest.. He didn't need the covers, but kept a blanket between us.

"I want our skin to touch," I whispered in his ear. He lifted up and removed the sheet that was between us. His skin was hot, hotter then usual. "You are so warm" I said.

"I know, because I phased."

"I don't think I need this t-shirt now." I said, getting warm.

"Nes." he protested as I pulled it over my head, and lay back down on his chest.

"That's better" I said and closed my eyes. The warmth put me to sleep quickly.

I opened my eyes quite early and saw my dad's face peeking in my door; our eyes caught each other's. Jake was breathing very heavily, neither of us had moved. Jake still wasn't under any covers, so my dad could see he was mostly clothed and my arm wrapped around him didn't look too bad. My dad just smiled and closed the door. I looked at the clock to see it was only 5:15, so I fell back asleep.

I woke up again to someone climbing on top of me. Jake's head was nestled in my neck kissing me. His hands immediately rose to my chest. He was massaging me before I even got the chance to open my eyes. I could feel his hardness pressing into me. His nose rubbed down my chest until his face reached the top of my tank top. He pulled it down and began kissing my left and right breast, pushing and squeezing up on them with both hands. I loved this wake up call. His mouth wrapped around my nipple and he sucked it into his mouth, whole, pushing into me again.

My body jerked awake and I sat up quicker then I ever had before, pushing him off me in the process…. "Jake! My dad!" I whispered, but with firm tone. I pulled up my tank top that was tucked under my chest.

"He left, to go to see Carlisle and Jasper. I heard him leave about 15 minutes ago. Your mom is in the shower. Now, who's stopping who?" he teased.

"Don't you think you could have said that earlier?" I was still shaken up.

"Relax," he said, pushing on my shoulders to lie back down.

He laid his head on my chest, rubbing his warm hands on my stomach. His kisses started again, this time with less passion, but still soft and wonderful. "You sure know how to wake somebody up."

He laughed. "Well, get use to it." I could feel his face rise against my body. We both heard the shower turn off and we got out of bed.

The next few days were like a rollercoaster, there were great loving family times, and there were tense moments of planning and getting organized. We were all too busy to think about what was really upon us. Thinking about Jake and I on our own, as much as I knew it would be great, I was nervous to not have my parents as a safety blanket for everything.

I was worried about my parents and their safety more then my own. Aunt Rose, Uncle E and Seth had left earlier in the week to meet up with Peter, Charlotte and Zafrina. Zafrina had learned what my dad had feared; they had people with them with abilities. She knew they had a few trackers among them, a reader, although she didn't think this one was anything like my dad or Aro.

I had been spending a lot of time with Papa and Sue. They had bought the boarding school bit and thought it was a good idea considering how gifted I was. Saying goodbye was very hard.

Grandpa Carlisle had given me a years worth of reading and some text books 'in case I got bored.' I didn't know what was upon me, but I knew it was going to be an adventure. I always thought Jacob and I would be safe. I had to get use to not using my ability; I had already been weaning myself off of using it. Although I never said 'I love you' to Jake out loud, I didn't think I needed to stop using it with him.

The rain hadn't stopped in days when our passports showed up. Uncle Jasper put them with the un-opened letter he had given me and put them in the glove box of the car.

"This is it Nes, do you have everything?" my dad asked.

"I think so. Jake is just putting some stuff in the car, and then going to see Grandma and Grandpa to say goodbye."

"We will talk right?"

"Of course sweetheart. We should talk about once a week. Buy a disposable cell phone once a month. Please let us know if you run out of money, we will find a way to get it to you."

"Thanks dad. I know I have told you this before, but I am going to miss you so much. I love you, more then I ever say it." My lips we quivering as he held me in his arms.

"I know sweetheart. I love you too. Be safe, be smart and be good, and always remember we are missing you."

My mom walked into the living room. "Oh sweetie." She said when she saw me crying. My dad and I let go of our hug to face her. "Honey, it's going to be fine. You will be fine. We all know this has to happen for a little while. You'll be back before you know it." My mom, our rock, was being strong.

"I love you mom. I am going to miss you so much." As I said it, I realized I didn't say it enough to her. She needed to hear it more often.

"I don't want to say goodbye mom"

"Then don't. You're going on a trip and you are going to come home soon… we just don't know when yet." She hugged me

I knew I had to get away, I knew I had to save my family, and myself but I never wanted to say goodbye. I had not prepared myself for this at all.

We all walked to the car slowly. I knew saying goodbye to my parents was the hardest part. I saw Jake standing against our car, my grandparents and Alice and Jasper were standing with him. I hugged them all, telling them I loved them out loud. I returned to my parents hug and sobbed into their embrace. "I love you," I cried out to them.

"You are going to be fine." My dad said.

"I don't care about me, I care about you. Just please remember who I have with me." I glanced at Jake. "_You _be safe. _You _don't be stupid." I said poking my finger into my dad's chest. I knew he would get irrational if things got dangerous.

"I wont," he laughed.

"I wont let him Nes." My mom said.

"It will work out Nes, don't worry. We love you…" My Aunty Alice said. Her words were the last I heard when I climbed into the car. Jake hugged my parents. Jasper and Alice said their goodbyes and headed into the house.

I stared out the rearview mirror down the long drive way. All I could hear was the windshield wipers, and all I could see was my mom finally fall apart into my dad's arms.

We turned out of the drive way and they were gone….

Jake didn't say anything for a half an hour. I knew we were heading north by the gage in the dashboard. He rubbed my leg a few times, but I didn't want to talk or think. He turned on my seat warmer, and the radio as we headed north on the I5; further away from home. I silently reached to the glove box to finally open my letter from Uncle Jasper.

'_Renesmee,_

_I hope you don't mind, but I felt I had to change your name. Your given name is too unique and will stay in people's minds. If these people possess gifts like your fathers they will follow other's thoughts to you. I have given you middle name, Carlie, as your first name with Dwyer as your last. This is Renee's last name, I know you don't know her, but I see some of her in you sometimes, and it came to my mind and I couldn't shake it. _

_Jacob's names have stayed the same as the last passport; Jacob Wolfe. I think the birthdates are accurate. I have made you both over 21 incase you are in a situation where you need to be legal. My associate also created backgrounds for you two; with good credit rating, high school degrees at Ballard high school, some college courses at Seattle University and he kept Jacob's native status._

_I will do my best to keep you safe. I trust my friends that will be helping us all from a distance. I promise to keep your father, my brother, calm and safe. I know your mother will do the same._

_Be the beautiful and wonderful person you are. Try not to worry about any of us._

_With love, your uncle, _

_Jasper._

I opened our passports, to see my birth year as1993 and Jake's as 1990. I was just 21 and Jake was 24.

"You are going to have to call me Carlie in public." Were the first words out of my mouth.

"How come?"

"Jasper changed it, Renesmee is too unforgettable."

"Do you care?" he hesitantly asked?

"No, everything else is changing, this seems like nothing." I said looking out the window at the rain.

"Nes, it's going to be fine; you have me, and I have you. We are going to be fine. Hopefully this will be over before you know it."

I looked at Jake, he looked sad for me. "I know. Thanks." I reached for his hand that was sitting on the center consol gearshift. "So what's our story, where are we going?" I asked. I couldn't feel sorry for myself anymore. I was going to miss my parents and family every day, but I had to be away, for everyone's safety.

"We are heading for Port Angeles right now, there is a ferry there that will take us to Victoria, in British Columbia. From there we are heading up this massive island. It wont even seem like an island it's so big."

"Vancouver Island?" I asked. I had seen a few maps in my day.

"Ya, and then from there, we can choose a spot. I was thinking about one of the fishing towns about half way up the island, but you can choose. We can take our time, decide which one we like."

"Ok. Here is your passport, Jasper made you 24. You think you can handle that?"

"I think so, how old are you?"

"21. It's a stretch, but he thought we might need to be older for certain things."

"We'll be fine." There was another long period of silence. Jake linked his fingers in mine and didn't let go until we got to the ferry terminal.

We went through customs fine. They asked us where we were going and Jake said back to University on a road trip. They didn't question our heavily packed car. Jake had timed it well so we didn't have to wait too long for the large ferry. Neither of us had ever driven onto a ferry before. It was a unique experience. I was a little nervous. I didn't really like boats for some reason. "How long is this ride?"

"Only two hours, I think"

"Ok," I rested my head back. "Can we just stay in the car?" I asked.

"Sure. Do you want to decide what our story is going to be?" Jake sounded a bit excited and I could use the distraction from my sadness.

I sat up and shifted my body to face him. "Ok, what were _you_ thinking?"

"Well I was thinking that we could use me being native and you being rich."

"Ok, what does that have to do with anything?" I was a bit confused.

"As to why we are on our own. We can say your family didn't approve of you being with a kid from the reservation and so we left our home town in Washington."

"Which is where?"

"We could say near Bellingham, there is huge tribe there."

"It will be so hard to not to talk about my family in a loving way." I said with sadness.

"We will just say we don't talk about them, it's a sore spot, and when we are alone, we can talk as much as you want."

"So that will be why we have run away or what?"

"Well people are going to ask if we settle somewhere. They will ask where we are from."

"Jasper has us in school in Seattle, and it's a big city, so lets just say there." I remembered his letter.

"That's fine. What do you mean though, jasper?"

"The guy who does the passports gave us a background and credit, which is a good idea. He said we went to school in Ballard, which is a suburb of Seattle and that I took a few courses at Seattle U. He kept your native status as well."

"That's good, I could use it to get a job"

"What do you mean, job?"

"Well if we go to a fishing town or something, it might be easier to get a job with a status because of limits and stuff."

"If you work all day, what am I going to do?"

"I don't know, the same?" he shrugged his shoulders. "If we are going to fit in and have normal life we should act like it. You could go to school or something though."

"I didn't even think I could create a life I would never have to have." I thought about it for a while. I felt the ferry pull away and slight rocking of the ocean.

"Ya, I think it's kind of exciting." I looked to him with sadness. "Don't get me wrong babe, I am going to miss your family, but lets make this our own adventure."

I couldn't not smile at him; he was so supportive and loving. I would have gone anywhere with him.

"If the roles were reversed, I would be with you, you know?"

"You mean if I were in danger and had to leave?"

"Ya, I wouldn't let you go without me."

"I would steal you away if you wouldn't." he smirked. "But thanks."

I pulled his hand up to my mouth and kissed it.

"We don't have to talk about this too much. I can put in a movie. Did you know this thing had a DVD player?"

"Sure, lets watch a movie. I need distraction from this boat"

"You don't like it?"

"No, I don't know why it makes me feel nervous.."

"You're crazy" he smiled and laughed.

I reached up to touch his face. _You make me smile and laugh when I don't think I can. I know ill be ok with it just being us._ I showed his me looking at our hands linked together while driving. When I looked up at him, his eyes were closed and his cheeks were rounded. He relished in the moment. His eyes stayed closed and he whispered that he loved me more then anything.

We moved some bags around and climbed into the back seat to watch a movie. We had bags of clothes, bedding, pictures, toiletries, if the customs had gone through our care they would have believed our road trip, on the way back University story until they found the few bags filled with money. We pushed everything we could into the back so we could fit in the back seat. Jake pulled out a blanket and wrapped it around us before putting on 'the goonies.' It was his favorite movie from childhood and I thought it was cute and light, so it was perfect. I fell asleep thirty minutes into the movie. It was exactly what I needed so that I didn't think about the massive boat 'floating' through the Pacific Ocean.

"Wake up sweetie, we're here" Jake kissed the top of my head.

"Really?" I was disoriented and sleepy. I couldn't believe 2 hours had passed already.

"Yup, we're were. Jump in the front so I can put some bag back on this seat so I can see out the rearview."

We drove off the ferry into down town Victoria. I was happy to be on solid ground. The streets were shinny from rain, but the sun was shining brightly. "Its beautiful here. Can we stay?" I looked over to Jake squinting from the glare, I hadn't thought to buy him sunglasses for a trip up north.

"Tonight for sure, but I think it's a bit too close to home. Lets get a hotel and explore this city though."

We drove around trying to decide where to stay. I wanted to stay in a normal, nice hotel. Jake wanted to save money and avoid using a credit card, which most major hotels required. We settled on a cute little bed and breakfast. The owner told us we were able to walk everywhere to save on parking downtown.

"Do you think it's safe enough to leave everything in the car?" I asked Jake.

"Nes, it's Canada, everywhere is safe, and she said she is here all afternoon and she has been nice enough to put our car in her garage. Relax, it will be fine."

We spent the rest of the day walking through the city. We checked back on the car, and decided to go for dinner close to the B&B so we wouldn't have to walk far. Our trip had only begun and we were having a great time. Jake took my mind off of my worries and sadness, and filled me with love and happiness. I knew our time away would make us closer then ever, in more ways then one.

_**Where do you want this to go next?...**_


	16. Chapter 16

_**Please Review... thank you to those who have already... i want feedback.  
Thanks**_

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Jake and I ended up having a romantic dinner, something we had never done before. We barely ever ate out, nor did we sit this close to eat, or have wine and dessert. I knew medicinal substances hadn't affected me, but after 2 glasses of wine I felt relaxed, a little giggly and slightly light headed. Jake initiated our wine to celebrate our independence so we let our waitress recommend a bottle, and we toasted to our adventure. The restaurant wasn't particularly romantic, but it felt like it the way Jake was acting. He would barely let go of my hand and stared at me several times through the night.

"This is it, this is what I want, always. Just to be with you, no matter where it is." He wasn't hiding the fact that he liked being away from everyone else we knew.

"I just love looking at you." Jake pointed out while we finished our dessert and last glass of wine.

"Did you like your dinner?" I asked.

He nodded and smiled. I had never imagined Jake as someone who would drink wine, but it was quite cute on him.

We paid our bill and walked home. The sky was clear and damp; I shivered with the chill of the air. "You know I don't need the coat, do you want it?"

"No, lets just walk faster." I suggested. Jake picked up the pace, as he already seemed quite keen to get me alone.

Jake ran up the stairs in front of me to our room when we got back to the B&B. I didn't think anyone else was staying there as it was the end of November, a Tuesday and there were no other cars besides the owners, and they had given us the garage. When I got to the door Jake was just opening the lock. I grabbed my toothbrush and pajamas and headed for the bathroom attached to our room. Jake followed me and we brushed the wine off of our teeth together. He left me to get changed. I heard him throw his jacket and shirt on a chair and his jeans and belt fall to the floor. He rustled through his bag, I assumed looking for his pajama pants. I imagined the whole scene in my mind; I was mesmerized by the thought of him undressing. I was still standing in the bathroom in my sweater and jeans. I quickly got changed, put my hair up, and washed my face. I opened the door into the bedroom to see Jake in the dim light, already in bed. His eyes were closed even though he was half propped up in bed. I thought he was asleep already, so I softly put my toiletries bag down on the bureau and slid into bed; trying not to wake him. I felt my eyes feel heavy as I lay my head back. I rolled on to my side and lay my leg over Jakes. He slid down in bed and faced me. I felt his warm hand slid down my head and then on my cheek. "I love you," he said in a sleepy voice.  
"I know." I said back, making him smile softly. I was still unable to tell Jake that I loved him, out loud anyway, and I saved my ability for the special moments. He knew how I felt; I didn't have to say it all the time, although I didn't mind that he told _me _all the time.

Both of our eyes were heavy, but he smiled through his droppiness. He pulled me into him, and held my body close to his for the rest of the night.

I woke up in the morning disoriented; not knowing where I was, I felt Jake beside me, and then remembered the events of the last seven days and months prior to this morning and remembered why were we not at home. Some sadness came over me, missing the option to sit with my mom, or hunt with my dad, or see my Aunties and Uncles, and grandparents.

Jake was twirling a piece of my through his fingers which made me conscious of him being awake and reminded me that I wasn't away from everyone I loved. "We sure crashed last night hey?" he said.

"When you say we, do you mean you?" I teased.

"What, you thought you were getting lucky or something?" he said making me giggle. I sat up and went to roll out of bed, but was pulled back into Jakes' chest. We lay spooning for another hour. His occasionally kissed my head or neck, but otherwise we lay in silence.

"I guess we better get up to get breakfast." We both knew breakfast was only until 930 and it was 845 already. I grabbed my toiletries, a fitted long sleeved shirt and the velour pants my mom and I bought and sneaked in the bathroom first.

"So do you want to stay here another night or get moving to find where we are going to settle?" Jake asked through the bathroom door. I was just drying my face off, and I really didn't know what I wanted to do. I felt a little lost. "hmmm…. Can you just decide?" I said hesitantly.

"Ok, I think we should get moving and find a small town to settle, we can always come back here... But if you don't want to, we can make this more of a vacation."

"No, I think your right," I said opening the door back into our room. Jake was dressed in one of his new shirts and jeans. He snuck into the bathroom to brush his teeth, and I sat on the bed waiting for him. He finished very quickly and came right over to me and kissed me. His mint-fresh tongue skimmed across mine. I leaned back on the bed, pulling Jake on top of me. "I take it you don't want breakfast?" he snuck in between kisses.

I shook my head, "not hungry" I hooked my finer in the collar of his t-shirt, and pulled him into me again. I wanted to kiss him for hours; get caught up in his lips and touch and forget about everything. His kiss became urgent and passionate. We had barely had any time alone over the last week, and we slept at my parents house; trying to get as much time with them as we could. Jake kissed me like he was deprived. I dropped my hands down his back, and under his shirt. I lowered my hands even lower as his kisses left my lips, and trailed down my neck. I raised my one of my legs around his thigh. I ran my finger along the waistband of his boxers, it was as far as I could reach and it was a good indicator as to where I wanted this to go. His hand clutched my chest as he returned to kiss my lips. At first over my shirt and then quickly, he ran his hands under. I was starting to realize that Jake touched my chest almost the instant he could. He paid them a lot of attention, and I wasn't about to complain. He pulled my fitted shirt up above my chest so he could attend to his favorite area with his mouth. He smiled up at me looking at my bright pink bra. He pulled one of the cups down and pulled the peak of my breast right into his mouth and I gasped with pleasure. He wasted no time kissing the rest of my chest; he went right for the prize. As he sucked it hard into his mouth I squeezed myself into him. He moaned slightly. I pulled my arms up his back, sliding his t-shirt up so our bare stomachs were touching. He so-easily did what I thought and pulled his shirt over his head.

_Knock knock knock._

Both of our heads shot to the door in panic. I pulled my shirt down quickly.

"Good Morning Carlie and Jacob" the B&B owner said through the door. "I don't mean to bug you, but Jacob said that you two would be eating breakfast, and you are the only guests today, so I don't want the food to go to waist. I would wait to put it away, but I need to take my daughter to a play date."

"Thank you ma'am, we'll be right down." Jake answered.

"I am very sorry to bother you." She politely said back.

"Don't worry, we were on our way already." Jake said smiling at me. He kissed my lips quickly and then slid off me, grabbing for his shirt. I lay there for another second wanting to be distracted again. Immediately thoughts of my Dad making Jake and I breakfast came through my head. I had to stay busy or occupied or missing my family was going to drive me crazy. "What are you thinking about?" Jake said, fully dressed again. I stood up and showed Jake my memory.

"Nes, it's ok, we'll be having Edwards eggs benny again before you know it."

I smiled at him. "What are you going to do when you call me Nes in front of people?" I didn't want to linger on my memories.

"I don't know, I'll have to make something up, like a nickname or something."

"A nickname we cant tell anyone the history behind?"

"I'll say you were obsessed with the lock-ness monster when you were a kid, and your family calls you that" Jake said, holding back laughter. He opened the door leading me downstairs to the kitchen.

"Good one." I laughed, rolling my eyes.

As I followed him down the stairs, I stared at his back, and I started imagined him undressing, as I did last night through the bathroom door. I wanted to watch him undress, naturally, slowly, as if I was a fly on the wall, or he didn't know I was there…. I wanted to see him pull his shirt off, and see the muscles in his back flex and release as he raised his arms above his head. I wanted to see him undo the button on his jeans and slide down the zipper. I wanted his loose fitting boxers to be sitting low so I could examine the muscles and lines that lead down beneath his boxers. I wished to see him shift from one leg to the next pulling his pants off under his feet. I was even imagining him hooking his thumbs in the waistband of his boxers to slide them down. I slightly shook my head and blinked my eyes.

"Hello? Apple juice?" Jake said. "Earth to _Carlie_"

"Ya sure, whatever you're having." I mumbled, coming back to life.

Jake laughed, "Where did you go there? I have asked you what you want to drink four times."

I couldn't exactly tell him where I was, or what I what I was imagining him doing. "Ill tell you later" I lied.

"Carlie, there are scrambled eggs in the frying pan, other wise there are scones, fruit, and waffles on the table." The owner said. "I'll leave you two to eat, I have to get my silly toddler ready to go."

"Thank you" we said in unison.

"You ok Nes?" Jake asked as she closed the door. He was piling his plate with eggs.

"ya, I am fine. Just wasn't ready for our moment to end." I said sitting at the table.

"Still thinking about me taking off my shirt again?" he smirked… _he had no idea._

"Ha Ha Jake. Mr boob-man" I joked back at him. Jake nearly spat out his first bite of eggs. I think he was a bit embarrassed, because his cheeks flushed slightly. "Sorry" he said looking down. "If I thought you were offended, or didn't like it I wouldn't do it."

"Jake, it's ok, I am kidding." I kind of felt bad because he was serious, he didn't want to offend me and I didn't want hesitations.

"It's just that they are so nice, and um… perfect." He whispered shyly.

"Jake, honestly I don't care." I felt like I would be blushing red if I could.

"You like it, or you don't care?" he pried leaning forward across the table at me smirking.

I wanted him to keep being forward and not ask every time he wanted to do something.

"I like it," I laughed.


	17. Chapter 17

**Next few chapters are going to be fluff before getting to serious plot...**

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We finished our breakfast and thanked our host. Jacob had paid her last night, so we didn't need to checkout. Her only instructions were to close the garage behind ourselves.

I re-packed what we had used and checked the room to make sure we hadn't forgotten anything. Jake lay on the bed, stuffed from his large breakfast.

"I didn't know you could get full" I said.

"I know, it was so good though." He said rubbing his full stomach. "Do you need a hand with anything?" he offered.

"No, no, I am done. You can carry the bag to the car, and we can get on the road… to wherever."

"I can do that." He smiled sitting up in bed. He stopped me as I walked past him by grabbing my thigh. "I am sorry if I offend you by getting caught up in certain parts of your body." He said with his arms wrapped around me resting his head on that particular area.

"Jake, I told you, it's ok. I wasn't complaining."

"Ok, but I guess I should start showing other parts that I like them too," he said pulling his arms from my waist to rub my bum. "Nice pants, these are soft." He said getting into his massage.

I rolled my eyes smiling at him looking up at me. "Let's get a move on" I suggested and was greeted by a quick kiss and a nod. Jake grabbed the bags and I put his wallet, phone in my purse, and handed him the keys.

"This is a nice city, we should come back and spend some time here." Jake said as we drove out of the city.

The car had a GPS, which was guiding up the island to smaller towns, where fewer people lived and we could blend in more easily. We decided to go along with Jake's original suggestion that we left the states to get away from my family, who didn't approve of me being with someone outside of their upper class and race. We were probably going to have to get some work to somewhat play that story along, but I had no idea what I wanted to do. Jake could easily work on a fishing boat or in the logging industry. We ruled out going to school, as we thought it might make things more complicated and Jake said teenagers tended to ask a lot of questions; something we couldn't afford. Besides, our ID's said we were over 21, so we were going with our provided ages.

I felt a little gitty and curious about some things about Jake. "How do you really know what you are doing when we are alone?" he knew what I meant, because a large grin spread across his face. "Have you been with other girls? Before I was born or while I was growing up?" a little bit of jealousy came over me to think of it, but I was curious and it really didn't matter.

"You know the only other girl I have kissed even was your mom." The weird scenario that surrounded my mom and Jake was explained to me, and I didn't think twice about it really. Jake was drawn to my mom, because something in her inevitable brought him to me. Their love for one another was juvenile and not thought of twice for my mom after she decided to never be with him, and not thought of again by Jake once I was born. It felt like Jake had a crush on my best friend, but almost ten years ago, so it really didn't bother me. The relationship between them I knew now, was friendship, and family; nothing more.

"Ok, but you could tell me if there was someone else you know."

"Nes, from the day you were born I have been with you, when would I have...but I didn't think about you this way until you grew up… finally." He joked.

"It's just that you are so good at what you do. How do you know?" _Oops._ _I did not want that to come out of my mouth._

"Oh really? How so?" he pried.

"Ummm. I don't know" I said unsure of what to say.

"C'mon Nes, I am casting a line here."

"Hum?" I was confused.

"Fishing for a compliment. Tell me." he laughed.

I smiled. "Casting a line, let me guess, that sounds like an Embry statement."

"Yup" Jake grinned ear-to-ear thinking of his friends. "The guys use to talk about girls when we were younger, and when we were a pack you saw and heard thoughts you didn't always want to. It's terrible, but I knew about Sam and Emily's bedroom relationship without wanting to."

"Really? Wasn't that weird for her?"

"I think she pretended we didn't know. But guys are guys, they think about sex and women all the time. Guess you're happy we don't live near any of them anymore, or that I don't really phase with them since we have been like that."

"Ya, but you don't really have anyone to talk to, if you wanted to."

"That's not true."

"Who then?" I asked bewildered, god knows it wasn't going to be his normal confidant, my dad.

"You, if I want to talk to someone about being physical with you, it's going to be you."

I couldn't help but smile. "Really?" I dragged out. "Any questions or comments so far?"

"It has been beyond my expectations. We fit perfectly together. I do want to know _what _you like? And want…"

"Is that how you would speak to your buddies? _We fit perfectly together_," I mocked a little bit. "Wouldn't that be implying that we have done more then we have?" I smiled at him.

"I think you know what I mean. I don't think I would ask my _buddies_ for advice on how to touch you or do things to you, I told you, I just follow my instincts. And you are avoiding my question." Jake sounded a bit annoyed.

"You want to know what I like and want?" I restated his question tentatively.

"uhhum." He smiled now. "No abilities either. I want to hear you say it."

"Jake." I whined.

"I am serious. No abilities, you need to communicate with me like normal people."

"Would you settle for me showing you besides using my ability?"

"Not while I am driving, c'mon, make this drive a little fun."

"Ok" I didn't feel that uncomfortable. "I like everything you have done, so far." I looked forward and down a little bit. I didn't want to look at him. "I like the way you take off my clothes, and I do like that you go for my chest in whatever way you can, as soon as you can. It does make me feel wanted, and it does feel good." I smirked a little thinking of his big hands sliding over my body.

"The truth comes out…" he laughed, lightening my nerves.

"I guess I really like that you read me so well. You make advancements and touch me in places I want you to… sometimes I don't even know I want it, but it always feels so good. Sometimes I want you to do something, and I think it, and you do it, but sometimes you blind side me and do things I wouldn't think of." I felt like I was nervously rambling.

"Is there anything you want me to do, anything you think about?" he pried, like he was looking into my mind last night.

I was hesitant, I couldn't tell him I wanted to watch him get undressed. I didn't want him to strip for me, the thought of that was awful.

"I think about your warm body on top of me. All the time… I love your big hands rubbing all over my body." I blurted out.

"Oh really, that's interesting. Did you like what happened to you a few weeks ago?"

We both knew we hadn't been very physical, with all the commotion of moving and sleeping at my parents house, it just wasn't the right time or place. We could kiss, and cuddle, but it had to stop at that. Our thoughts had to be fairly controlled as well, being with my dad as much as possible, which wasn't that hard, because the move and sadness had filled most of my thoughts.

"I did. Did you?" I smiled. I think I was casting a line now.

"I did, I want to see you do that so many times, and in so many ways." He opened up.

I smiled a little shyly. The though of Jake putting me over the edge like that was incredible. I wanted to feel that way again too, at his hand or any other way he knew how to. "Would that be ok with you?"

We both just smiled. All I could think about was getting Jacob Black out of those clothes. I unbuckled my seatbelt and crawled over the center consol and began kissing his neck. "I want you whatever way I can have you." I whispered in his ear, following it by a kiss, and then sat back down in my seat.

Jake shifted his jeans, he was clearly turned on. "Nes, you have no idea what you do to me."

"I think I have an idea." I said, because he did the exact same thing to me.

"Honestly, I can believe it sometimes that you feel this back for me. I was soo worried for years that you wouldn't, and you would become and adult and I would have to watch you love someone else." He rubbed his fore head and shook his head to himself.

"We'll I am glad too. This is the only life I want…. Except for this 'in-hiding' thing" I prefaced.

"Adventure" Jake corrected smiling again.

"Right" I smiled. He was dead set on not looking at this as running away.

The rest of our drive was beautiful with minimal rain, but full of grey skies. Vancouver Island was as green as Washington, and I was quickly realizing that it felt safe and friendly. Everywhere we stopped for gas, food or washrooms, people were polite and lovely. After almost four hours we arrived in a town that Jake had been thinking of. "This is Campbell River, its small enough, but has enough I think. Lets try it out, explore for a few days, and see what we think." Jake suggested.

"Ok, where are we going to stay?"

"The lady at the B&B suggested a place called Oceans Lodge, it's on the water and you get your own little cabin."

"Sounds good to me." I needed to get out of the car, and was a little excited to be alone with Jake after the topics covered on our drive.

"There were signs guiding us to hotels and resorts and we easily found the oceans lodge."

Jake pulled up and parked and ran into get us a room for a few nights. He grabbed cash from one of the bags on the back seat and his wallet from me. I really liked that he took charge in situations like this. He booked us a cabin for 4 nights on the water, and paid cash. Jake avoided putting down his credit card by leaving a 500-dollar deposit.

He came back to the car with a key and little map of the resort and the area. We drove through the resort past a few other cabins and condos, until we reached the end of a lane, and parked in front of number 36.

"This is it," he said. I couldn't see the cabin yet, as the number sign stood in front of a wooded pathway. We unbuckled our seatbelts and got out of the car. "Let's check it out, and then I'll come back up for our stuff." Jake smiled, already happy with what he had booked. He grabbed my hand and swung it as we walked down the path. There was a slight mist now in the late afternoon, but the tree mostly shielded us from getting wet. We walked for only 2 minutes when we approached our number 36 cabin. The path continued past the cabin with a sign saying 'beach' with an arrow.

The cabin was beautiful. All of the features were wood and stone. There was a massive fireplace with rounded stones as a chimney. There was a kitchen, a loft bedroom, 2 bathrooms, and a cute little deck with a hot tub not big enough for more then 2 people, a open concept into a sitting room with a large bureau holding a TV, stereo, DVD player, and 2 large couches surrounding it.

Jake ran up to the car to get our bags. We didn't want to risk leaving our belongings in the car, so he made a few trips. I unpacked a bag of clothes into a chest in the bedroom for Jake and I.

Once Jake had finished bringing down our stuff, I jumped up on him, wrapping my legs around him. "I love this place," I said to him. He walked us over to the door leading out to the deck and slid it open with one hand, while holding my bottom with the other. He sat me on the edge of the deck, with my back to the beach and ocean. I didn't realize how high up we were, and I was nervous sitting on the ledge like that until I was covered passionate kisses. Jake had me cradled in his arms and I wrapped my legs around him; securing myself to him. His lips trailed down my neck. I wanted this to continue, but I knew we needed to get some food first, and then we wouldn't have to leave for a few days, hours, weeks, whatever he wanted, I would do.

"Let's go get some dinner, rent some movies or something, and settle in for the night. It looks like its going to really rain tonight, and I don't want to have to leave here again, for a while…" I suggested.

"OK" Jake picked me up off the ledge, but kept me around his waist. I started kissing him, squeezing into him, contradicting my suggestion. I caressed his flexed arms. He carried me inside and lay me down on the couch and lay on top of me, with my ankles linked together with my legs around his hips. "Can we get food to go?" he whispered in my ear, kissing my neck and sucking on my ear lobe. I stretched my neck out, allowing him a better angle.

"Or order in?" I said pulling on his shirt, up his back.

"Ordering in it is."

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**Tell me if you want them to wait or not… do you like the lemons or the story… I need some guidance. I know where I would take this, but I want your opinions…**


	18. Chapter 18

**Thank you for your feedback and comments... hope you like this one.  
**

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I pulled his shirt up his back and grabbed urgently at his skin. I wanted everything that was separating our skin from touching to be gone immediately. His kissing seemed as urgent as I felt. He reached behind his head to the collar of his shirt and pulled it over his head. He locked his eyes with me and led his hands to my sides. I took the opportunity to sit up myself, as Jacob hovered over me. I took off my own shirt and quickly lay back down. He looked down at me, and smiled at my chest. As he leaned forward to lay back on top of me he tucked his arms beneath me, and as I thought he was going to unhook me, to reveal more, but he lifted me up off the couch. He didn't say a word, but I could see the couch wasn't long enough for him, and he and I clearly needed a little more space if this was going go the way we intended. Everything about him was calm and quiet his looks were intense but loving. I felt nervous as Jake carefully carried me up the stairs to the beautiful bed that I hadn't admired until now. He sat me down on the edge of the bed and knelt in front of me. He slowly kissed the center of my chest at the top of my cleavage and lowered his warm lips directly down the center of my body, lingering on each kiss. He kissed above my belly button, and below, and then pulled on the tie that held my pants up. He slid his hands in the sides and pulled them down. He slid them down my legs all the way, although they would have fallen on their own, he seemed like he wanted to touch my legs down to my feet. He slid off my socks and kissed his way back up my legs. He hesitated at my upper thighs, avoiding my black underwear before raising his head to my stomach and up my chest. My breath was broken; _Could_ _he tell how much I wanted him?_

Before he could devour my chest and stomach I slid back on the bed. I pulled back the blankets and got underneath them. Jake turned off the overhead light and turned on a dim lamp on the bedside table before sliding under the covers with me. It wasn't close to bedtime, but something told me, we were going to bed.

He lay beside me on his side caressing his fingertips on my stomach, looking my body up and down. He kissed my shoulder and I turned to face him and pulled him on top of me. I immediately wrapped my legs around his hips and his hands touched my bum. He squeezed it a little locking eyes with me before diving into kissing me. Every move he took felt intense. He left a slow line of kisses down my neck and for the second time today, pulled down my bra and took me into his mouth with infatuation and haste; finally speeding up his pace. I was panting and watching his face.. His eyes looked up and me and pulled his mouth away from the peak of me, "They are just so perfect, oh god, you turn me on." The man in him gasped and then pushed into me like he never had before as he took me back into his mouth. My back arched, pushing me into his mouth and hips. He unhooked my bra and slid it down my arms before throwing it to the floor. He massaged my chest while still pushing into my center. I dropped my legs a little to give him the best angle possible. I reached down to undo his pants, as much as I wanted to see him undress, I didn't care how they got off, but the denim was thick and restricting us both. I slid down the zipper of his jeans and immediately went underneath his boxers to grab what had so nicely been pushing into me. I squeezed him tighter in my hand than I ever had before and we both let out a slight moan. He was panting as I slid my hand up and down his shaft. Jake was hovering over me, allowing me access to _his _center. I pushed up on him. I wanted to be in control this, and I forced him onto his back. He kicked off his jeans and I pulled down his boxers just below his hips and sat up on him, straddling his legs. I sat up and boldly looked him in the eyes and I returned to stroking him. I had wanted to see him enjoying this for a while, and I was going to try to have the best view possible. I did feel exposed sitting up on him like this, and so I pulled the sheet around my shoulders, and around us. I leaned forward a little bit as I increased my speed. Jake was squeezing himself upwards, clenching the sheet with one hand and my legs with the other. His head was back, and his face looked so beautiful. He occasionally looked up at me, but his eyes were closed for the most part.

"Nes, I don't want this to end. Slow," and I responded to his request, because I was hoping he had another plan for his release.

"But I want to make you" I whispered, I didn't really want him to hear me.

"You will," he breathed closing his eyes again, resting his head back.

"More then once." I boldly said, feeling more comfortable because he wasn't looking right at me. A smiled came across his closed-eyed face. I lay down closed to his face and I kissed his chest, slowing my speed. "Tell me if I do it right" I whispered, I had become a little insecure because he stopped me before and it was fun to hear him say it.

"Oh you do it right" Jake said with a mischievous tone, and before I knew it, Jake had flipped me onto my back. His head fell to my shoulder and his hands were below my waist. He slid my underwear to the side and slid his fingers inside of me. His pace was immediately forceful and fast; the same pace I remembered he used to put me over the edge. He rubbed my moisture in and out of me, he slid it around, but was being slightly restricted apparently, because he pulled down my underwear altogether. "is that ok?" he asked with doe eyes. All I could do was slightly nod my head. I was shocked with his sudden onward approach.

He pulled up his own boxers and wrapped the blankets around us as he came back to my lips with an open mouth. His tongue was urgent but gently tangled with mine. He pushed himself into me. I swear it felt like he was slightly inside of me, aside from the cotton boxers between us that were becoming damp where he was pushing into me. He hadn't pulled far enough away, so he was constantly settled at my opening…

I couldn't take it, I wanted him, although we hadn't been doing this for very long, I needed him. "Jake" I gasped. I didn't know what else to say, but his name. he slid his hand down my body and back to my center and slid inside of me again. This time when he slid out he stayed with my ball of nerves rubbing up and down. "Like this?" he asked. All I could do was nod, "or like this?" he asked rubbing in circles. He slid back inside of me, and out again slowly. "which do you like?" he whispered in my ear.

All I could do was pant, with my head laying back on the mattress.

"Your body, Nes, is so amazing. You don't know what you do to me." he was breathless. His left hand found my breast, as he was rubbing in and out of me with his right. I felt my urge build, like I wanted more of him, like I had a pulsating itch I didn't know how to scratch. I squirmed my feet in the sheets. Jake slid his fingers from side to side again, and then he pushed in slightly, up and down on my center of nerves. "Oh god" he breathed. Him enjoying this as much as I was turning me on. I reached for his shoulders to pull him towards me. I needed him, I didn't know how, but I did. His kisses on my neck and chest increased as the speed and concentration slowed at his hands. He lowered himself down my body. Jake pushed his two fingers inside of me and left them there, as he had before when he needed to compose himself. His head was kissing my hip bone, when I felt his warm breath blow on my damp centre. I shivered, becoming aware of the moisture I had produced. Jake lowered his head a little further and pulled my ball of nerves into his mouth. "Holy shit" I somberly called out, shocked beyond belief with his movements and the sensation. I never swore, but there were no other words for the feeling. I had forgotten how exposed I must have looked beneath the blankets.

Jakes pulled me in and out of his mouth, keeping his fingers inside of me, but fairly still. Within thirty seconds of this new sensation and both of us moaning, I fell over the edge, all of the building and contracting flowed through me with my release.

Jake was panting. "Nes" he gasped. "I need you." I reached for him, and pulled his face to mine. His want was clear. He slid closely up my body and I realized he was sliding out of his own underwear. He was shaking slightly, and I wasn't sure if I was breathing. Our eyes locked. "I love you," he breathed. "so much" he whined. I could feel him against my leg, avoiding my entrance.

He touched his forehead to mine and closed his eyes. All I could feel was a 'but' coming along.

"What? What is it? It's fine." I sighed, reassuring him, holding on to his shoulders. At that point my want and need for him over powered all other emotions in my body.

"I am an idiot," he said.

"You don't um,…?" I hesitated, sounding juvenile and rejected.

"I knew we needed to be safe, and I didn't prepare for this" Jake said, sounding like he was talking to himself.

I hadn't exactly taken it upon myself for us to be safe either. My mother had told me that birth control would surely not work on me, so it really _was_ left to Jake.

"Ohhkay" I dragged out, and looked away from his eyes.

"But Nes" he said, and I turned my face back to his dark brown beautiful eyes. He caught me off guard with a passionate kiss. His passion was overwhelming, maybe he didn't care, maybe I didn't either…. I wrapped my arms around him again without hesitation and pulled his chest into mine. I knew this was dangerous, but I didn't care, all other feelings inside of me were lost.

"I want you" I said, and as I did, I couldn't believe it was me. Jake rested himself below my center, but I wanted him closer, so I shifted down his body. As I did, I realized how real this was. I reached my hand out to hold him in my hand to guide him towards me.

I felt nervousness and fear came through my body. _Ovulating all the time._ My mother's words flashed through my mind and I hesitated. I slowed my kisses and released my hand. Jake felt my apprehension and tried to focus on my eyes. I looked up into his eyes and thought of the words that I wanted to say to the man who I loved, and who loved me back with the utmost exquisiteness. The words could not come to my lips, but they did to my hand. I touched his face and thought of how much I loved every moment with him, and that he made me feel so amazing and loved and that I never wanted it to end. He smiled at me, I hadn't noticed he had sweat a little, but his hairline was damp and glistening. He tilted his head and questioned his brows at me to see if I was upset or hurt. My hand was still on his cheek and I thought my mothers words to him, just as I had thought them.

He nodded with closed eyes. He leaned in and kissed my nose and then my lips. He sucked one of my lips into his mouth, pulling it out towards him as he pulled away. I smiled as I pulled away.

"I'm sorry" he said after a moment of silence filled with a smile.

"It's fine. I'm glad you said something, because that was not on my mind at that point." He laughed nervously.

"It barely was on mine." He said shifting off to the side of his body. He pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arm around me, resting his head in his other hand. He pulled up the cover from our waists around my chest. He laughed and smiled to himself.

"What?" I was confused as to what was funny at this point.

"holy shit, hey?" he mimicked me. " I didn't expect that" he laughed.

"Well neither did I," laughing as well; thinking of myself and the state of shock and pleasure. Jake always knew how to take a tense moment and make me laugh.


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for your reviews and advice... let me know what you think...**

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Jake and I lay in comfortable silence for a while before Jake broke the quiet.

"It's already 530" Jake said, leaning back to look at the clock on the bedside table. My eyes locked on the phone wishing I could call my parents. I had never gone more then a day without talking to them. I had never _not_ been able to call them. I wonder how it was for them, and if they had any news or if they were sad or too busy to think about it with their own move. All I could do was hope I could find a computer and email them in the morning.

"Do you want to go get that dinner we talked about?" Jake asked, shifting slightly in bed.

"Sure" I also knew that I wouldn't need to hunt for a little while, so human food sounded good. My dad and I hunted a lot before I left, but I would eventually have to go out alone; another thing I hadn't done.

Jake sat up in bed and reached for his boxers. He sat on the edge of the bed, with his back to me. I was still amazed at how beautiful his skin was; the muscles and his skin color were amazing. He stood up quickly, pulling his boxers over his hips. I peeked at his bare bum for the second I was able to. He turned around, catching the smile on my face and grinned back at me.

He left the room for the bathroom, allowing me to scramble to find my articles of clothing scattered around the room and in the sheets. I went downstairs and carried another bag upstairs. Jake was pulling up his jeans as I walked up the stairs back into the loft-bedroom.

"Here, let me take that" Jake came over and grabbed the bag from my hands. He laid it on the bed he had just made, and pulled out a black t-shirt for himself and asked if I was ready to go.

"Well, I think I need a shirt first, and you might want a sweatshirt."

"Right" he laughed. He pulled on a distressed sweatshirt that I had bought him. "I'll never get the worn-out look. If I wanted something to look old, I would wear something old. You want to see my sweat-pant shorts, are those in fashion now?" he grinned mocking me.

"I think Alice threw all of those away a long time ago" my family had transformed Jake into a Cullen, aside from the whole vampire thing, he had nice clothes, great hair, and was gorgeous, the latter accomplishing on his own.

He laughed, "You're right. I guess we should go back into the main drag and find something to eat." I could tell Jake was hungry because he was eager to get a move on.

"Do you want me to go out like this" I gestured at my body. I was sorting through my bag trying to find a shirt or sweatshirt for myself.

"Maybe not, but I don't mind it now." I rolled my eyes as I finally found one and threw it on over my bra.

We went into the chilled night and found a grocery store and bought some supplies for a few days. Neither of us felt like sitting down to wait for dinner, and as much as we were alone, we were embracing it. We bought pre-made pasta for dinner from the deli and headed back to our cabin.

We set out our dinner the coffee table in front of the couch but we sat on the floor.

"Are you sure this is something you want to do?" Jake asked as we finished up eating.

"What? What are you talking about?" I stuttered.

"I can't get it off my mind." The man in Jake was shining through. "Sorry, I mean, even with everything going on, do you think it's worth it to risk it?"

It was clear as to what Jake was referencing now. "I know it would be _worth _the risk," he went on, "I just mean, are you ready? I don't want to force you."

"I don't know what to say" and I didn't. I didn't know if I could openly talk about this, it was much easier in the heat of the moment, or so they say._ If you aren't able to talk about sex, you shouldn't be doing it. What should I say? _

Jake broke the silence, "Do you think you are ready to do that?" he paused; "with me?" he slid a little closer to me as I nervously took a sip of water.

"I do and I don't Jake. It's no lack of feelings, at all" I had to make that clear. "I think these last months has lead us to the right place, but I don't know if we should wait until we are settled or this whole thing has stopped. Or until we maybe know more about our, or rather my situation." I felt like I had waited a while for this, I couldn't imagine what it had been like for him. "It's not a lack of feelings or not _wanting_ to. I do." I was battling with my rationale, my parents' words, and my want for the only man I could see myself with…ever.

"I don't know if I can wait any more. I know that sounds forward, but I… don't want to wait. I don't want anything but you." Jake put his hand on my leg turning me towards him.

"I don't want anything but you either" this was the most forward I had been with Jake. "But I have to think about this situation and my body. It is just a lot to process, and deal with.. with all of this."

"I know, I'm sorry." Jake looked down. I knew he felt bad for feeling like he was pressuring me.

I had to reassure him, "Let's just try to be prepared. I don't want it to feel planned or anything… ok?"

"Prepared and _careful_ are good." He repeated smiling. "Sorry to be so forward, but I needed to say ask you…it's hard to think straight in other settings." he smiled.

"It's ok; it's on your mind." He was right; it was hard to think rationally. It was comforting that he was telling me his wants, as he had been the _responsible _one stopping us. "I am sorry I don't have a definite answer for you right now though" I looked back down at the ground, feeling embarrassed and silly.

"I just love that we will get there. I don't want to feel like I am forcing you."

"I think I do my fair share of instigating and _not _wanting to stop. But I know you must have been waiting a long time for this" I giggled a little.

He smiled back at me, and kissed my forehead. "You are very understanding, you know that? I am not complaining, but I feel like I _have_ waited a long time, but not just for this, for you, and that's the best part for me, being with you like this." He brushed his hand down my head, and his touch felt like magic.

"Worth the wait?" I teased looking up into his eyes.

"Definitely" he smiled the biggest smile he had. "What do you say we put that hot tub to use?" Jake would do anything to get me into a bathing suit, but I could hardly complain. Nervousness came over me. As much as I wanted to share myself with Jake, and be with him, there _were_ risks, and a lot of other worries at this point. I didn't want to let him down most of all.

Jake ran upstairs and got into his shorts and went out on to the deck to set up with mini hot tub. It looked like it might only have room for his large body, but I was sure he would make room for me. I went upstairs into the bathroom and found my bathing suit; thank god I packed it, because I almost hadn't. Luckily Aunt Alice was adamant about always taking us girls for bikini waxes too. I wondered if she _could_ see my future sometimes. I smiled to myself thinking of Alice taking me for my first adult waxing. She was so funny and cute and after a while, I didn't feel uncomfortable. I wondered if I would find a place here that could do that…. I drifted off thinking of my aunts and uncles and what they were all going through for me.

"Nes, hurry up" Jake called down, pulling me out of a trance.

"Patience Jacob Black" I called down. "Don't worry, it's well worth the wait" I teased back at him. I felt so confident in us that I didn't feel alone or lost.

"Does that have a double meaning?" he called back making me laugh out loud.

"If you're lucky" I grabbed two towels, doubting that Jake had done that, and went to the deck where Jake was already in the steaming hot tub. I lifted my leg over the ledge and Jake stood up to help me. I knew he didn't have to, but he was using the excuse to touch me and pull me into him. He leaned down and kissed my shoulder as I eased into the water. I sat beside him, with my legs across his lap. I wanted to look at him. He stretched out his arm and softly ran his wet fingers along my arm.

"You _are_ worth the wait Nes."

"I know." I smiled, teasing him. I couldn't not think about how wonderful being with someone like that would be. Not someone; Jake. I knew he would be gentle and careful and know exactly what to do and where to touch me. I wanted to make him feel as good as he had been making me feel. I wanted to give this to him, to share this with him, but part of me was unsure, and I had to listen to that.

I touched my lips to his, and individual kisses turned into passion fill moments. We had to pull away at certain points. I couldn't take it; every time I was with him I wanted more.

"Are you sure I didn't imprint on you?" I asked him. I wanted him to know how much I felt for him, but I still couldn't get the words out of my mouth.

Jake's face lifted, and he nodded through his smile. "I am pretty sure it was me, sorry I didn't give you a choice."

"I have a choice, and I choose you. It's cheesy I know, but I do, I choose you."

"That – is – nice – to – know" Jake said through kisses.

Jake barely hesitated to lift me up and carry me upstairs, again, kissing through out the walk, he set me on the bed and left me for a few moments. I quickly undressed myself, dried off, and put on shorts and a tank top and I climbed into our bed under the covers. _Our bed, I like that._ When Jake returned he had only a towel on, hanging low on his hips and he slipped into bed, dropping the towel subtly. His naked body slip up beside me, causing excitement and nervousness to come over me. He cleared my hair away from my face and looked intently in my eyes.

"Nes, I think I've made this clear before, but I need to say it again, I love you, I always want to be with you, whether you love me forever or not, I will always be with you in some way. Being with you like this means so much to me. I will love you just the same if we do that one day, or never, because you will always be the only one for me. I don't even know if imprinting can make you feel this strong, but I do. I just need you to know I will do anything to make you happy."

A tear slid out of the corner of my eye and down to my hairline. I smiled at his gorgeous face.

I did like that Jake had come to bed without his clothes on, but it was more tempting for me to stand by my thoughts of wanting to wait a little longer….

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**_Should i still make them wait...?? the next few chapters are going to get these two into their new life... i hope you like. add me to your fav list, review, whatever... i want to know if you like this :)_**


	20. Chapter 20

**Thank you for all of your reviews! It has really helped me - I appreciate the constructive criticism too, so keep it coming!!  
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We had decided to try to rent a house for a few months, but there wasn't a lot out there. Most of the rental places wanted yearlong leases and bank deposits, but were also really not that nice. I had emailed my parents an update and Jake had disposed of his phone, so we were waiting on a reply from our email to make our decision. Jake booked us in for another week at the resort we were staying, which I was really starting to like. We were hoping to have something for December first, which was another week away, or we decided we were moving on to another city, maybe a larger one.

Jake went into the corner store to get a newspaper and I went into a coffee shop a few doors down to stay out of the rain, which was slightly changing to snow. The coffee shop had Internet access and a lot of food, so I went to the counter to get Jake some food and some hot drinks.

"Looks like it's really going to come down today, eh?" the 20-something girl behind the counter asked me.

"hmm" I mumbled. I felt like I was being a bit short with her, but I didn't know how to talk to strangers by myself, I always had someone there with me...

"So… what can I get-cha then?" her tone was short, I was right, I hadn't said that very politely.

"It's actually really cold, so maybe it will snow" I said awkwardly, I almost cringed at myself.

"So would you like something hot?" her smile returned to her face.

"Yes please, what's good?" I thought that would be a good icebreaker.

"I love the cinnamon spice hot chocolates, but I try not to have one more then once every few days, they have so many calories." She was more friendly than most of the people I had met. "but if you don't like cinnamon, I would recommend a classic mocha, with whip" she smiled.

"I'll try the first one you said" I knew my figure wouldn't change no matter what I ate, and I was curious. "And a mocha actually." If I didn't like it Jake would trade with me.

"Sure" she smiled. "not worried about your figure I see?" she said as if she had read my mind.

I laughed, "They both aren't for me, I'm meeting, umm,…. someone" I didn't know if I could call Jake my _boyfriend_, it didn't feel like enough, but it also wasn't something I had called him before. "Can I also pay to use the internet?"

"Don't worry about it, just log in, the user name is Misto and the password is Latte…Real original…"

"Thanks" I laughed. She was busy steaming milk, so I went to walk towards the computer.

"You're not from around here are you?" she asked, pulling me back towards her.

"Oh, no, I'm not." _Was I that obvious and awkward?_ I looked down at myself, making sure I didn't have some sign attached to my body saying 'vampire tourist in hiding.'

"Ya, I could tell, it's a small town."

"Oh, I'm just trying to find a place to stay."

"You _want _to stay her?"

"Ya, I think it's nice." _Wasn't it? _

"Where are you from?" this girl didn't seem to think she was being nosy, and I felt comfortable, so I went with our original story.

"Seattle"

" I like Seattle, my aunt lives in Everett, she married a Navy guy and he's based out of there, it's a nice town eh?" Her Canadian accent was sublet, but cute.

"Ya, I really like it" I grinned thinking of home. It was going to be hard to convince people as to why we left.

"Hey" the girl whispered and gestured me to stand a little closer to the high counter. "The umm… cute guy that just came in is staring at you." I hadn't heard the door open over the steaming milk and chatter. I nervously turned to see who was looking at me. Thankfully it was Jake sitting at the counter smiling. I waved and he held up a paper and waved back.

I smiled looking back at the girl. "Oh, Jake." I smiled.

"Oh sorry. You know him?" she leaned in, trying not to have her hear him. She didn't cross me as someone who would get embarrassed, but her white cheeks flushed.

"Ya, he's the reason I left home" I smiled.

"Makes a little more sense." she laughed putting whip cream on top of both of the drinks. She put them up on the counter

Jake got up and walked towards me. "I didn't get you anything to eat, just a drink, but are you hungry?"

He tilted his head to the side. _When wasn't he hungry, _he smiled without saying it. I just laughed at him. "Just a drink is fine."

"Do you have a pen, so I can write a few things down?" I asked him.

"Here, I have one. Do you need paper too?" my cute coffee girl offered.

"Thank you" I turned back to her to take the pen and paper from her. Jake looked down at me smiling to me being 'normal.'

"I am Stella if you need anything else."

"My mom's.." Jake subtly nudged me, knowing that it sounded like Bella. "…. Umm, had a cat named Stella" I laughed a little to cover my awkward stumble. The thought of my family with a pet was almost comical, but I had to cover my almost slip up.

"Ha, well it was my dad's favorite kind of beer."

"That's a good one." Jake snickered

"Well, I'm Carlie and this is Jake." I said touching Jake's arm.

"nice to meet you both" she smiled at me again and her face went a little flush looking at Jake. I knew she was harmless, and probably felt uncomfortable calling him cute to his 'girlfriend'. "Use the computer as much as you need to" she added.

"Thanks you," she seemed so nice and friendly I thought.

I checked our new emailed account that we had created and there was a response from my dad.

_Hi Sweetheart,_

_We are all doing well. Please don't worry about us. Moving has been a smooth process for everyone. Your Grandma found a beautiful house. Your mom and I are in the main house with everyone for the time being, but we hope to have our own place by the time you return. The house feels empty with out you two and Rose and Emmett. Grandpa is going to wait for things to settle a little while before working at a local hospital. _

_I have inserted some contact info for an offshore account we have. You can contact them, and have them send you cheques if you need to put a deposit or need money. It is all very confidential. Uncle Japer told them your new contact information, so don't worry about that._

_Write yourself a cheque to yourself if you need any extra money._

_Peter has met up with Zaphrina already and they hope to intersect with Rose and E later this week. Peter has also hired a tracker join them for a small wage. We are hoping this whole ordeal will be concluded soon, and you two come home where you belong._

_Be in touch when you can._

_All our love,_

_Dad and Mom_

I breathed heavily, holding back my tears. Jake wrapped his arms around me and I rested my head on his shoulder. "At least he sounds positive and as soon as Emmett and Rose meet up with Peter they will hopefully intercept and take care of this..." he kissed the top of my head. "…before we know it Nes," he whispered into my hair, followed by a kiss in the same spot he spoke into.

I composed myself and took a sip of my hot chocolate. It was delicious; Stella was right. "Did you see any good places in the paper?" I asked, changing the subject. The last thing I wanted to think about was my family intercepting and getting hurt.

"Just one and I called and we can see it in half an hour." I looked out the window at the weather, and it was raining very heavily with specks of white in the sheets of water.

We thanked Stella as we left and she smiled and waved, I told her we would be back. I really hoped to see her again.

"Good luck in the weather out there" she said as we left.

We viewed 2 more places that day and they were not that great. There were not a lot of options, so it looked like we were going to have to move on. For some reason I wanted to stay where we were. I liked the little city, it wasn't overwhelming and after a few days here I already knew where things were. I just hated that we couldn't find anything that was even remotely suitable. We were tired and wet when we got back to the resort. I lay on the couch wishing we could settle somewhere. I didn't like the feeling of unknown and uncertainty.

"Why don't I see if we can rent this place for a few months?" Jake asked.

I liked the idea, but I thought it would end up being too expensive.

"Is that practical?"

"Well it would mean we wouldn't have to buy a bed and a couch and TV, all the things we don't need because we have them at home. Do you like it here? Or do you want to keep looking for another place?"

"I like the idea for sure. But maybe we should see how much it would be, and keep looking?"

"I really like this place, and I really like the idea of not having to move and buy a ton of stuff for no reason."

"Well, work your magic with the girl at the front desk tomorrow."

"Done. We can definitely keep looking though"

Jake went back to cooking dinner and I flipped through the channels as I realized that it was snowing. It looked absolutely beautiful against the black sky. Jake put something in the oven and came over to the couch to lay with me. His thick hair was still a little damp, but I didn't mind, it was so soft.

We lay together until Jake got the urge to make a fire. He was so cute splitting wood with the provided fire utensils.

Looking at the first puff's of smoke I thought of burning vampires. Regardless of the outcome, someone would burn because of me.

"I know what you're thinking, and don't" Jake caught me out of my trance staring at the paper catching fire with the kindling and wood. I shook my head and breathed heavily. "Nes, it's going to be fine, everyone will be safe."

"It's hard to think that way, I just hate that people have to put themselves out there for me. I don't feel like I am worth it to have other people die"

"No one is going to die, no one that you love anyway." Jake didn't totally comfort me with his words, but he sat in front of the couch rubbing my leg, and having him near me always comforted me.

"what are we going to do with ourselves? I mean are we going to sit around everyday?" I broke the silence.

"I was thinking about trying to get a job, I guess that would be normal"

"What do you think you want to do?" I asked. Jake being normal was a funny thought, but he was right, this would blend us in.

"I am sure I can get a job on a fishing boat or logging, but I think they would both make it so I was away, and we both know I cant do that."

I furrowed my brows at Jake, I hated it when he made it seem like he was my babysitter.

"not like that Nes, it would drive me crazy to not see you every day and sleep beside you every night. Now that we have started that, I will never be able to sleep with out you."

"Some how I think you'll be able to sleep." I teased. "… and you said that about the shower, and you have made out ok. You have showered haven't you?"

"Speaking of that, you need a shower" he waved his hand in front of his nose. He made me laugh like no one could. I pushed against him and he pulled me in to a kiss. "I love you, you know I cant be away from you." he quickly kissed me again, leaving me with a smile and jumped up to check the oven.

I needed to show Jake I felt the same for him, and I knew he was able distract my mind away from my thoughts. I quickly ran past Jake and up the stairs. His head spun to catch me already at the top of the stairs. I ran into the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack and turned on the shower.

"Nes" he called out from downstairs. I didn't respond, I pulled off my clothes and got into the shower quickly. Hoping the steam would saturate the glass walls to the shower before he caught on and came upstairs. I turned up the water as hot as I could take it, and waited….

"Nes," he called out again, I could tell he was walking up the stairs. "I was only kidding babe."

"You said I needed a shower" I finally responded in a faux embarrassed voice.

"I didn't mean it" he said from behind the door. I almost felt bad for making him feel like he offended me when he hadn't.

"You need one too, you know?" all I heard were his foot steps run down the stairs and then back up them, surely to turn off the oven. By the time he returned the room was full of steam and I could see the silhouette of his body approaching the shower.

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**If you like this, and you havent already, add me to your favorites - I update every few days!  
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	21. Chapter 21

**Sorry this took so long to get up, it's not that great, but it's necessary to the story.... I have the next 2 chapters written, i am just editing them.

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Jake took his time washing every inch of me. His strong hands sent shivers through my body. I barely quivered under the heat of his skin, which was nothing compared to the steaming water. Again, I wanted more, but we stopped before the touching got to be too much. Jake dried us both off before heading down stairs for dinner. As always, Jake had left me alone to get changed. I was tired and didn't feel like going back downstairs. I got dressed and got into bed with my book. I had neglected my reading and really missed some of my schooling sessions with my Grandpa. _Maybe I should look into some courses. Wouldn't that be normal? Is there was somewhere I could register in this town? _I didn't think there was a university or even a college here, but maybe I could find something online, or at a community centre.

Jake came up to check on me after he ate. He wasn't ready for bed, but he came to lay with me anyway. Sometimes he would do anything just to be beside me, and I could never complain. He knew when to talk, and when to leave the silence.

He turned on the hockey game quietly and before I knew it, it was morning. Jake was still asleep when I woke up. I looked at his face; although many of his features were prominent, his sleeping face was delicate and soft. I shifted my body closer to his to feel the heat from his body. His face twitched slightly and is eyes began to open to see me watching him. The corners of his mouth lifted and pulled me closer to him, closing his eyes again. I didn't know what time it was, but I could have stayed in bed all day in my warm nook.

"I guess I should try to get a job today." Jake said, breaking the silence.

"Why do we need to do that again?" I was trying to convince Jake to stay in bed with me all day. I rested my leg on his and squeezed him into me.

"As much as I love this, what if it's months of this? I think you would get sick of me fast, and I don't think we could exactly blend in if neither of us worked." He paused brushing my hair down my head. "You said you wanted to settle somewhere and not stay on the move, right?"

"Ya"

"Well then let's take this opportunity to be as normal as we can, we may never have a time like this again, let's take advantage of it."

He was right, I would never be able to be on my own again, or at least I never thought I would. "Ok, well lets get up then, get your unemployed self a job."

"You thought about what you want to do?" he questioned, pulling his face back to look at mine.

"I was thinking about trying to take some classes or something. I actually miss my school stuff."

"Didn't your grandpa give you enough stuff?"

"Ya, but you're right, I don't want to be alone all day, and this is the only time I can get out and do things as a _human_"

"Glad to hear you may be embracing this a little bit." He squeezed me into him a little more. "I am going to get some breakfast, you hungry?"

"Sure, I didn't eat dinner last night, I should probably eat."

"Your not feeling hungry these days are you?"

"No, not really, I feel like I need to hunt more then I need to eat, which is weird."

"Maybe it's just nerves and habit, but anytime you want to go hunt, I'll come with you."

"Thanks, but I think I'll do that on my own" I did _not _want Jake to do that with me. it was the one thing I hadn't done with him growing up.

"I don't really want you going out into the woods on your own. It's not safe."

"Jake, I don't need a babysitter, for god-sakes." I sat up.

"I know you don't, but why cant you see my side, it's dangerous, especially now."

"Ok, DAD!" Jacob had a way of getting under my skin like my dad could. He laughed back at me, annoying me a little more.

"Whatever Nes, just let me know when you want to go" he said going into the bathroom

"Jake you said you weren't going to put limits on me." I called after him.

"Ya, as long as I could be there, and you agreed. What is the big deal anyway?"

"I just don't feel comfortable."

"I can see you naked, but I can't watch you kill a few animals?" he said as he closed the door. I could hear him laugh

My face went hot with embarrassment. Jake never made me feel uncomfortable, and maybe he felt comfy enough to reference me being naked off the cuff like this, but I wasn't.

"You can't compare the two"

"Yes, yes I can. It's about being comfortable! You think I wont like you after I see you do that?" he mumbled through brushing his teeth. He re-opened the door and walked towards me.

I kind of did, I was worried it would gross him out a little, but it was something I only ever did with my family.

"Fine Jake, I'll let you know" rolling my eyes as I lied. I would try to sneak away once he got a job. He smiled back at me showing all of this teeth with his mouth full of toothpaste. I couldn't help but laugh and him as he walked away.

I returned to the coffee shop, hoping to see Stella again. I was eager to interact with her again, it felt easy and I thought she would be able to help me find somewhere to take classes or at least the internet could help if she wasn't there.

Jake was going down to the dockyard where the fishing companies were to see if they needed help on the docks. He planned to pick me up in a few hours, but I think he was nervous to leave me. He didn't want to seem like he was being overbearing, but I could tell he was apprehensive. Jake dropped me off at the coffee shop and I kissed him goodbye, suddenly insecurity came over me a little. I didn't want to seem like a stalker, but was so curious to know more about Stella, and this town.

"Morning Carlie" she said as I walked through the door into the relatively empty coffee shop. "You here for more internet or another hot chocolate?"

I smiled and my insecurities started to fade. "Hi" I hesitated, not even knowing what I was going to do. "Sure, another hot chocolate and internet."

"You liked it did ya?" I just smiled and nodded. "Is your boyfriend with you again?" she smiled softly.

"No, no, he went to try to get a job. I am on my own today." I felt like I was babbling giving too much information.

"Sounds like fun" she laughed. "What does he want to do?" she didn't seem to mind me providing too much information.

"I don't really know…" I went on to tell her about what he is thinking he can do, either logging or fishing, I made up a little story about him having knowledge of that from his reservation. She thought with his Native status he wouldn't have a problem getting on with any number of fishing crews. Uncle Jaspers's note looped through my mind.

"What about you?" she asked. Sitting on s stool behind the counter handing me my drink.

"I don't really know, I was in school, and I kind of miss that." I missed learning from my grandpa, I wasn't sure if I would even like school.

"I can't really imagine that…." She laughed. I felt insecure again, like I was saying things that normal people wouldn't. "But then again, I didn't do school after high school, I am sure it's great, I just had to start working here."

I looked at her peculiarly. She obviously picked up on my furrowed brows asking a question because she quickly answered. "This was my mom and dad's place and my mom got sick a few years ago and I had to take over. She is fine now, and works some days, but I have just gotten so into routine, I haven't broken it."

I smiled with her, silently thanking her for letting me into her life a little bit. The door opened and we both turned to look. Stella greeted a man named and asked about his dog and wife. He paid for his coffee to go and smiled at me on the way out the door.

"Small town, I told ya" she said shrugging her shoulders at me as he left. "It seems like nothing ever really changes. It's nice, but it's not, at the same time."

"I like it here" I blurted out, knowing that I didn't know the half of the town, I just liked that it was different, and I could have hated it for many reasons, the most being that it wasn't home and my family was no where near.

"Why did you come here again?" she asked politely, as I leaned against a barstool close to the counter.

"Family stuff" I tried to sound casual, but I felt my voice shake a little. "We wanted to get away for a while to give our family some time away from us." It was her turn to have her brows furrow in question. "My family wasn't really OK with Jake and I. They wanted me with some university type, someone going somewhere" I raised my hands wrapping air quotations around my last words.

She laughed softly, but allowed me to go on. I told her some of the story Jake and I had contrived and other parts I made up on the spot. She was calm and asked questions through out the story, forcing me to think about the potential holes in our story that I should fill Jake in on later.

"Why here though? It's not somewhere you can really even get your life going or prove them wrong." Her cynicism in this town was evident.

"We don't want to prove them wrong, we just want to be able to be us without a lot of complications. It's also somewhere they wouldn't expect."

"So they don't know where you are?"

"They think we are in Victoria" I lied. "I told them I might register for school there" I prayed there was a university or college there to cover my lie.

"You could" she laughed. "They have a lot of on line courses. You said you missed school, that's the closest school that is good and offers that kind of thing." She walked me to the computer and opened up the University of Victoria's web page. "I have a few friends that have done courses on here." I felt relieved that my story came together.

"Thanks, I'll for sure check it out"

"So what else are you going to do here? Err, I mean, sorry, that's forward."

"No, no it's fine." I liked that she was forward. I noticed that she was quite pretty and petite I tried not to stare at her, but I couldn't help watch her movements. She wasn't as fluid or smooth as my family, but she had something very beautiful about her. I could smell her blood and knew I had nothing to question. She smelled like Sue a little bit when she hadn't been around Leah or Seth. My mind drifted to my Papa, I really missed him and knew he must be lonely with retirement coming along as well. I was in a trance again, and Stella was still standing beside me.

"Sorry," I shook my head slightly. "I don't know what else to do." I really didn't. I didn't know what people my age did. Knowing what was _cool_ was beyond me. "Any suggestions?" maybe she could shed some light without knowing it.

"Do you want to work?"

"I don't really know, I don't have to, but it might be good for me"

"What do you mean?"

"I have never _had_ to work before, but it might be a good change."

"How old are you? You have never had to work?"

"twenty one, I was in school and my parents supported me." I shrugged my shoulders, feeling a little embarrassed that I had lied, and that I knew I would never have to work.

"Oh," she paused thinking. It made me nervous, _was this not the case with many people? "_so what are you going to do now?"

"I don't really know" I needed some sympathy after sounding and feeling like a spoiled child. "We left so quickly, and we didn't have a plan. It's all a bit overwhelming." I said looking down, hoping she would see that I was lost and this was overwhelming, just not in the same way I was leading on.

"Well you could get a job, what do you like to do?" another person walked in the front door and Stella greeted them by name again and went back around the counter to serve them, giving me a chance to think of an answer. I was pretty sure she liked talking to me, but I wasn't sure of my story as every lie felt weird. Lying just wasn't an option in my family because of my dad.

_**so do you like the action or the plot? **_

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	22. Chapter 22

Stella's coffee shop became my hangout that week while Jake started working down on the dock. His job would only be part time for now, and as the season got busier he would there more, but they wanted him to learn his job, so he was committed to every day.

I went to the coffee shop partially to use the computer and do the online course I had registered for, but also to hang out with Stella. She never made me feel like I was stalking her like I thought I had felt I was. She was always enthusiastic to see me and encouraged me to come back the next day. I arrived after the morning rush, so we spent most of the time talking and little time working. I learned about her life with her parents and her mother's illness a few years back. her father wasn't the nicest guy until her mother got sick, and their relationship changed. They spent most of their time now together traveling. He owned a trucking company as well that he could maintain, so Stella was stuck in the coffee shop, but she didn't seem to mind. She was always cheerful with people, even though she complained slightly about this town.

I explored a little on my own, but I didn't want to venture out and get lost. Stella told me the town wasn't big enough to get lost, but I wasn't so sure. I knew Jake would hate to hear about me getting turned around and not be there when he came to pick me up. He would worry almost as much as my dad would.

Jake liked his job, and came home happy everyday. He met a few guys that he liked that invited him our for beers after on the Friday, but he didn't feel comfortable leaving me alone. I needed to get a life outside of my on line bogus course. What could I do? Should I try to get a job?

"what would you think about me getting a job?" I asked on the first Friday night of Jake working week.

"Nothing too full time or permanent, but something that occupies my time a little more." I love hanging out at the coffee shop, but it wasn't realistic. I wasn't really blending in hanging out in a coffee shop every day.

"What ever you want. Try to work at a store or something that isn't boring, but you also know you like."

I knew Jake was avoiding to use the safe word, but I couldn't blame him for not using a word when I knew he was right, and trying to not be dad-ish.

"I don't know. It's hard to act like a human and be normal"

"You are too funny Nes" Jake laughed, coming into the kitchen, helping me put away groceries.

"Don't you think? We are totally spoiled."

"I know all the guys on the docks talk about money and pay day."

"Was it not like that in la push?"

"first of all, there are no other native guys down there on the docks, there are some native ships, but they stay separate somewhat. Second of all, I didn't work when I was a kid and then you came around… so I have been Cullen-ized ever since." he laughed wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling his head back to look down at me. "Everyone on la push takes care of each other. No one has mortgages and whatever gains there are from fishing and other marine work is communally shared somewhat."

"You never really care about material stuff before hey?"

"No, why would you when no one else does? I never thought about it until I started leaving La Push, and even then I didn't care. I worried when I started ripping sweatpants to shreds during my early phasing days because it was a cost, but Billy always seemed to get us by."

"And then me? Right?"

"No, there were periods before you were born I thought your mom liked your dad because he had money, nice car, whatever… but that was before I knew he was what he is. But getting to know your mom proved that all wrong."

"So you were annoyed when we buy you things?"

"No, I know you guys all like it, and I don't hate it, I just wish I could make money for myself. Ya know?"

"I understand, but I don't think there is a need to worry about money."

"I know, but the point is making money for yourself. We don't and wont always need to be on the run and have bags full of cash. That doesn't have to be a reality for us."

I knew this whole thing would go away and we could re-join my family again, but Jake was sounding like he didn't think we had to.

"Do you not want to go back to my family?"

"No, I do, for a while, I think we should always be close to them, but I want us to be us too. We have the potential to live a normal life. Leave some of this supernatural stuff behind us. Don't you want that too?"

"I want to be normal. But I don't know if what I imagine, and what you imagine are the same?" I pulled away a little bit and jumped up on the counter top.

"Don't you think normal is growing old together, having a family, ya know the normal stuff" he said pulling back as well. I felt like we were contrasting a little bit here.

"Jake, I know you have gotten use to me aging at a rapid pace, but this is it. I am not going to age anymore. I think I will look like this for, well forever. You can age if you want to, like you said, Sam has facial hair and is starting to become a real man." I saw Jake's face lift hearing about Sam aging.

Jake wanted to age, my heart hurt. It burned. I couldn't match him in this area. Didn't he know this?

"Nes, I shouldn't have said grow old in that sense. I meant have a lot of years together. I have to phase more if I want to stay looking like this. You know I don't mind that" he flashed his beautiful smile at me. "But I do want some things to change as we do. I want us to eventually live on our own. I want for you to be ok with just me. Mostly I want to keep you safe. I don't know if you know how much I am ok with it just being us. I know you are safe, and _I_ am the most happy I have ever been when it is just us."

"I am more then ok with just you. You know I…. you know how I feel." I couldn't say it. But I felt like he was questioning my commitment. " but I do love my family. I don't _want _to be away from them. But I am happy we are getting this time…"

"where we don't have someone in our head all the time." He finished my sentence. I smiled across as him as he took a step towards me, standing between my legs as I sat on the counter. I pulled him into me and pushed my face into his chest. I kissed his collarbone.

"You don't know how hard it has been to shield my thoughts from your dad." This wasn't the first time I had heard this, but I loved his honesty nonetheless. It was nice to hear how he felt about me. "your skin, your kiss, your body." His hands rubbed my thighs and wrapped around to my bottom, sliding me closer to the edge of the counter. His lips touched my ear, "…and everything I want to do to you…"

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**what do you think should happen next...?**

**Next Chapter is from Jake's POV!**

**sorry for the delay in updates.... keep the feedback coming and thanks for all of the new story/author favs!!!**

**S**


	23. Chapter 23

JPOV

_I know I am going out on a limb here and changing voices, but I have really wanted to show what imprinting feels like for Jacob… and tell the other things going on in his mind.

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Did she know how I really felt? Watching her caught me in a daze sometimes. When she did the simplest things like turn a page of a book, turn to look at me or put away groceries, like she was right now. She blew my mind with her beauty and charm. When she touched me I felt like I was floating. I didn't think she really knew how badly I wanted to be with her, _really be with her._ I couldn't have said it more, and I think if I show her any more, she will feel like I am forcing or smothering her. Finding the balance between love and obsessed was hard to find.

Imprinting was something I had given up on, and then her… where I least expected it, but my world held, froze…. Sometimes I felt like I was re-imprinting on her at every stage of her 'life.' I waited for this part of our life. I didn't want to rush it and knew it would happen when it would. I could only hope that when it was right, and when she was a women, she would feel for me back.

When she became a woman, my feelings changed and my love altered, just like my life had when I saw her the first time. My urge to touch her became the first clue that it was different. I had always loved her, and would do anything to protect her, but the thoughts about touching her flooded my mind….

The best part was she loved me back, she felt how I felt, she understood me, and made me want to be better, _for her. _Although she couldn't tell me she loved me out loud, she showed me in many ways. Whether these feelings stayed for a long time, I didn't know…, all I could do was try to make her love me forever, show her I was worthy, and want grow old with me, and leave our alternative world behind.

I would go anywhere, be anyone, and do anything for her. I knew she knew that, but I wanted to show her that in so many ways. My want to be with her was so much more then purely sexual; it was to connect in a way that lovers are meant to. I had told her I didn't want a child now, but I wouldn't be angry at that outcome, if it was our fate. The only thing I wouldn't want was more danger for her and our child. I shook my head…breaking my thought… I couldn't get a head of myself, I wanted Nes to love me, and in whatever way she would. I wanted to be with her in that way not to make a child, but to connect us irreplaceably. I had made taken the necessary precautions, in hopes that we could be that way soon…

She was my world. She didn't know that I woke up after my dreams of terror and watched her sleep. The littlest twitches and watching her body move as she breathed in and out could keep me awake for hours, and being tired the next day was always worth it. Even better, over time she started to rub her feet against mine subconsciously when I wasn't touching her. If I pulled them away, in an experiment, because I could barely stand not to touch her either, but she would look through the sheets for my legs and feet with hers, sleeping all the while. This amazing woman was mine. I wanted to make all of her mine. I would do or be anything she ever wanted of me. I now understood the unconditional love Edward had for Bella years ago,….another life ago.

_Edward, Edward_. How I use to despise everything about him? From his smell to his cars, from his perfect family to his pompous confidence, all made use to make me want to rip him limb from limb, and roll my eyes, all at the same time.

But, over the last 8 years he truly had grown to be my best friend. He pushed me to think about things differently, become more educated then I ever would have staying in school at La Push. He taught me patience and a trust that I never knew before, even with the pack. I use to think it was always only about Nes, that he wanted me to become like them for her, but he wanted me to become better for myself, for my future, which would inevitably be his daughters future. This trust and genuine confidence we shared was what cause me to keep this secret from Nes.

Edward has told me that Aro think the South Americans are on to something and want to see what comes of the reproduction. You would think these people wouldn't be too interested in research and development, but over time they have seen their race come into jeopardy because of covens like the Cullens. I didn't understand the royalty of the Volturri, but anything that Carlisle and Edward took that seriously, I had to as well.

They would not interfere with the threat of this foreign coven coming to experiment with Nes. Keeping her safe was everyone's priority, and was my life. I would fight to keep her safe until I wasn't breathing.

All I wanted was a normal life for us. I didn't know if we could grow old together, or if we would ever have our own family, but at this point, I would settle for just she and I to be safe… together and safe.

The Cullens were in hiding as well. Edward and I had set up our own communication system; he would write draft emails in an account and I would retrieve them. I would delete them after I had checked them so he knew I had gotten them. It was a one way avenue for communication. If we were in danger, or I suspected, I had free reign to call. Otherwise, I was not to contact him directly. They hadn't let on that they were going to fight off the attack. Jasper had already left and was setting up their attack plan. All we could hope for was no support from the Volturri. Edward had told me that they were going to try to cut off communication from Nes for a little while. I had to try to keep her as busy as possible, as distracted as possible.

Edward was unsure if there were two attack groups, one to fight, approach the family and the other to search for Nes. The Cullens were going on the run, thinking the best defense is the best offence. The Denali women were on their way to survey Forks.

We didn't know how much the South Americans knew, but I was hoping for an update soon. I had to stop thinking of this and help her put away the groceries and listen to her ramble on about getting a job. She was so innocent, blissfully unaware of the danger to her.

I needed to do what Edward had suggested; distract her. Nes herself was distracting at the best of time, but lately, with the physical changes in our relationship, I couldn't help but think of the things I wanted to do to her, with her…. Without anyone around to disrupt or hear. It was the only plus side to this whole ordeal….

Tonight, I would show her that this is what we were ready for. Tonight I wouldn't stop; I would complete our connection. I would successfully distract her… and show her all of the love I had for her.

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**what do you think of my jacob voice and the new info?**

**the adventure is going to increase and a few dreams are going to come true... what do you think?**

**S  
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	24. Chapter 24

_**I am glad most of you liked my little Jake POV. This story is more then lemons.. but here is one to reel you back in... enjoy. please review.

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All he wanted was to be with _ME_, in any way he could have me, he would take me.

He picked me off the counter, and I wrapped my legs around him. he effortlessly took us upstairs. He was silent, intent on something. Jake wasn't kissing me or even looking at me until we got to the edge of the low sitting bed. He lay me on the end of the bed, but stood over me when he finally locked eyes with me. He took the liberty to pull his shirt off over his head and let it fall to the ground. His silence was making me nervous. It wasn't just his silence; it was his intensity. Every look and movement was intentional and concentrated. I lay on the bed, not knowing what to say or do.

"do you love me?" he broke the silence, and as the words came out of his mouth, it felt like a dream, like he wasn't real. He knew I couldn't outright say it, but I _could_ nod.

He smiled as he saw my head move in agreement. "Let me do this. Let me show you." He said as he crawled on top of me. His words felt cryptic, but he wanted to show me how he felt without holding back.

I knew no one would ever love me the way he did, I knew I would never love anyone else. I knew there were people after me that wanted to use me as a vessel for another species, and that this could easily happen without my consent. The though of anyone but Jacob with me in that way scared me more then anything else.

I nodded slightly at Jacob before his lips touched mine. His lips slowly slid into mine. His thumbs hooked under my shirt and he pulled it up and over my chest. I lifted my body up to allow him to pull it over my head. He ran his nose down my check and neck, kissing my collarbone down my chest. All of his movements were slow, but intense. The quite was almost eerie.

He slid his both of his hands around my back and held me up from the mattress. I felt smaller then I ever had with him as his arms wrapped completely around me. he scooped me up and slid me up, so that my head rested on the pillow. He pulled back the blankets and slid me into bed. His eyes were locked onto mine constantly. He was speaking to me without saying a word. His intentions were clear, and I was nowhere near going to complain.

Speaking of not complaining, Jake stood up and undid his own pants and slid them down his body. He reached down and turned off the lights. If there was ever any point that I was unsure of his plan for tonight, they were now gone.

"I am going to show you how much I love you. How much I always want to be with you. Is that ok ?" it felt like a rhetorical question. As if it wouldn't be ok with me… I soberly nodded again. Anything he wanted, I was willing to do.

Jake slid into bed in the one piece of clothing that would keep him from revealing himself completely to me.

His boldness motivated me. I unhooked my bra myself and threw it aside. Jake rolled on top of me, taking advantage of my new reveal; he took me into his mouth. My back arched and his hands clenched my hips as he lowered his face to kiss around my belly button. The residue of heat he left on my skin, was nothing compared to the throbbing he was causing between my legs. My hands tangled in his hair pulling more then patting; urging him on. His big brown eye looked up at me as he pulled his fingers in the top of my leggings. I swallowed hard. I felt the nervous shaking inside of me. he left a single kiss at the waistband of my leggings before looking up at me again. He licked his bottom lip nervously as he pulled down my pants, revealing my white underwear; the epitome of virginal. He smiled looking down at what he had revealed. He shook his head slightly. He crawled up my body, returning to my lips. I realized I hadn't said a thing since we came upstairs. He needed to know how I felt, what I wanted, how much I needed him… always.

"I want this." I whispered in between his kisses. I could feel him smile as he trailed kisses down my neck.

His hands were everywhere; my arms, chest, legs, everywhere; roaming freely. I wanted him to never stop. I was being taken over by the power he had over me. I needed to touch feel him. To love him. Completely.

I wrapped my arms and legs around him, pulling him into me. he let out a sigh and clenched my hips as he pushed into me. The two small barriers between us were obvious, and needed to go. As if reading my mind, Jake lowered himself to remove mine almost immediately. He lowered his head below my waist and tasted me. I bit my lip and my back arched as he pulled me into his trance. My breath was stolen from my chest as he gripped his large hands on my hips. I moaned and cried out for him. I couldn't wait another second for him. Just as I went to reach out to pull his face up to mine, he slid up my body. He had removed his own boxers as he maneuvered himself to my entrance.

His eyes shyly looked over my body. I reached out and pulled his face into mine. _Yes. _There was nothing more to say or question. We had said it all.

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**I know it's short, but sweet.**

**do you want a full description or more plot? or both?  
**

**do tell me what you think....**


	25. Chapter 25

**WOW after 24 chapters i reached 100 reviews... thank you so much. i live for the feedback on this story!  
So in honor of that - here you go... enjoy!

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The way his body moved on top of me and inside of me was purely blissful. All of his touches were delicate and his kisses weren't urgent; they were full of love. His entrance was slow and somewhat painful, he completely filled me, stretching me almost…. Once he entered completely into me, he froze. His brown sobering eyes looked at mine, asking for approval to move without saying a word. I looked at him with the most love I had ever felt, hoping he could read me without my ability or words. I wanted more immediately. Nothing had ever felt as good as the sensation of him entering me. I wanted it over and over again, but I had to be patient. His eyes were closed, as if composing himself, before moving slightly and then he pushed into my lips as he started moving consistently. His breaths were deep and broken, although we hadn't exerted ourselves… yet.

With each movement my pleasure increased. There was no pain, only discomfort initially, but it was long behind me... I watched his facial expressions and movements; I quickly realized how much pleasure he was in. his eyes looked over my body, and I started to move my own hips slowly, meeting his rounded movements. I touched his face and hair, and chest as he pushed up away from me slightly. He turned his face into my touch, kissing my hand. I couldn't get enough of his skin and the feeling he was making me feel. He looked down at me in between his long hard breaths and long blinks. He looked like he was stunned half the time, but in heaven the other half.

His hands continued to feel my whole body. He pulled my legs up; encouraging them to wrap around his body. His hands rubbed up and down my thighs with each slow movement. Again, he knew exactly what to do without guidance or direction.

He moved his hips slightly faster as he pulled his chest and head back and away from mine further, exposing his chest to my full view. His breath broke. The pulsations between my legs were granted reward as he increased his movements; filling and stretching me, bringing more pleasure to us both with each movement.  
My hands were urging him on, running my down his smooth arms and chest.. I didn't know where I wanted to touch more; his hair, or his face, or his chest, or his arms; I felt like I couldn't get enough.  
I took in his body with my hands and my eyes. The muscles seemed like they overlapped each other. He bulged in places I didn't think possible. His ab muscles entered into a V lower down his body, pointing and our connection point. I had seen Jake naked before, but I never noticed this beautiful definition. Angle? Movements? I didn't care; it was beautiful and it was for me.  
I watched as these muscles contracted and released with each thrust into me; enjoying the view and the pleasure he was bringing me. I began to feel breathless.  
His body and movements were pushing me over the edge. "Jacob" I panted. His face half smirked at the sound of his name. And with that, his lips slid into mine, catching my attention and my eyes to shoot open. His hands then left my body and pushed on the mattress beside me, pushing his chest further away from mine again.

His face filled with what looked like pain, shock and resistance, and then I could tell they were none of them. He came with the most wonderful sound of shattered moaning and breathing. His chest, forehead and arm muscles flexed to the point of quivering. His body fell into me. His pants slowed and his timid face nuzzled into my neck. His kisses started again, slowly, individually, but with less angst and more gratitude. His body was like a warm blanket draped over me. I had never felt better in my entire life. I was starting to think he hadn't either.

"I don't know what to say" he whispered, as I ran my hands through his hair. "you just. I… I don't know. It was.." He couldn't say anything. I took that as a good thing.

"Are you OK?" I whispered into his hair.

"I am the best I have ever been…." He paused, and nuzzled his head into my neck and hair further, touching his lips to my ear. "I am sorry you didn't, but it felt so good, everything…just…?" he breathed again, dumbfounded.  
I touched his face again._ I have never been or felt better then I do right now. Your love is overwhelming.._I felt his cheeks rise at my thought.

"no, no, _our_ love is overwhelming."he corrected, raising his head to look at me.

"This… it was amazing." I stuttered, shocked at his intense eye contact.

He began to rub his nose along my cheek and towards my ear, until hip lips lightly touched me. "I have imagined this more times then I would like to admit… but it was better, then I could have imagined…. And I can't wait to do it again?" Jake laughed into my neck.

Jake shifted out of me and I instantly missed the sensation. He shifted his large frame to my side and ran his fingers through my hair and down my body, over and over again.

"We were safe right?" I asked after a while of breathing and silence.

"Safety first" he whispered. "It was subtle enough for you not to notice, so it wasn't awkward?"

"I knew" I teased

"we'll be fine Nes, don't worry." He kissed me again, reassuring me, although I wasn't worried, I gladly took the kiss.

"I know. I am not worried. Worth the risk." I corrected.

"glad I'm not the only one who thinks that." He laughed again.

I wasn't worried. If that was what I would get from him everyday for the rest of my life, I would take the risk.

Jake and I lay in bed for another hour before dressing and emerging for the dinner we had put off.

Jake was glowing with a smile and I believed I was too. I was more committed today, then any day before, to never be with anyone else. It did make me a little more afraid of the people hunting me. I had more to lose now.

Jake quickly made dinner, making me lay on the couch, assuring me I would need my rest. I wasn't particularly hungry, but nibbled on what he made. I needed to hunt, but didn't want to get into the argument of me hunting alone again, especially tonight. Tonight was perfect. Jake put on a movie after dinner and pulled a blanket over us. Thirty minutes into the movie he started kissing my neck in a certain way that his intentions were clear.

I grabbed the plates and offered to clean up.

"Just leave it." He suggested, pulling my hand towards the stairs. I shook him off, in a nice way. I reassuringly kissed his hand and looked up and into his eyes.  
"I'll meet you up there."

I needed a second to myself. I didn't want time away from Jake, I just needed to squeal to myself. I wished I had someone to talk to, but I was happier then I had ever been. I knew I would be alright if Jake and I stayed apart from my family for a little while and I knew what he meant now, by enjoying the time we had away. God knows I wouldn't want to be anywhere near my dad right now. My mom might understand, and I would tell her when we were together again, although, I am sure she will be able to tell. She was always aware of my changes without me saying anything at all.

Jake and I had hummed and hawed over our actions enough, and I was happy that we didn't have to wait any longer. This whole scenario had brought us to the right place, regardless of the threats, there was no where else I would rather be.

I washed the dishes quickly, unable to wipe the smile off of my face. I quickly tidied the rest of the kitchen and ran up the stairs. I had expected Jake to be in bed, watching the sport highlight reel, but he had lit a few candles beside the bed, and lay there on top of the covers in nothing but his pajama pants.  
"Jake" I smiled at the little romantic mood he was creating.  
"What?" he laughed. "It's bed time. Can't I wear my pajamas? You cant expect me naked all the time." That was Jake for you; he never made things too forced or uncomfortable, just perfect.  
I laughed and grabbed my tank top and shorts and headed for the bathroom. I still couldn't wipe the smile from my face as I brushed my teeth. I briefly thought about being bold and not wearing anything to bed that night, but I was sure I wouldn't be in my clothes for long, and wasn't ready to walk across the room wearing nothing… just yet anyway.

Jake's side of the bed was closest to the bathroom, and I crawled over his sprawling legs, instead of walking around the bed to my side. He immediately grabbed me and pulled me into him.

"Have I told you how incredible you are today?" he asked kissing my nose.  
"nope. Not today." I smirked at him, pulling away and playfully crawling over him and under the covers. There was something about being covered. I slept with my own heater every night, but I still enjoyed being under at least a sheet. I lay my head on the pillow and looked up at Jake, still resting his body on the headboard. I wrapped my arm along his stomach and pulled myself into his warm skin. I kissed his side and reached my hand up to his chest. _Thank you, for everything. This couldn't be more perfect, even if it's not the most ideal situation. _

"Are you happy?" he asked.  
I nodded into him_._  
He slid his body down the bed, so our faces were an inch apart. His intense eyes looked into mine. "I love you" he whispered, not wanting to hear me say it, never pressuring me, only sealing it with his lips. "… and I am so happy." His hand found my stomach and began rubbing side to side on my bearskin. He pulled the blankets up a little more and hitched his long leg over me. He rested on his elbows, and looked down at me. he shook his head from side to side, rubbing his nose across mine. he closed his eyes while doing this, like he was taking every moment in, and I couldn't help but do the same.  
A few seconds after I closed my eyes I felt his lips on mine again. I knew the way Jake kissed me when he wanted it to go somewhere, and I knew the way he kissed me when he only wanted to kiss, and it wasn't the latter.  
As always, his hands roamed my body. I could tell immediately that he didn't have boxers on, and I rubbed my hands down his back and under his pyjamas to touch his bear bum. He let out a hard breath and a smile rose on his face. "What?" I had to ask.  
"it kind of tickles." He grinned, lowering his face into my neck. I tried to squeeze the two mounds of muscle. "Nes" he moaned, laughing.

"I cant believe it, Jacob Black has a ticklish spot that I didn't know about."

"Maybe I can find some sensitive spots on you." He squirmed away from me, but sliding his hands up my sides, under my shirt. I squirmed and squealed as he roughly tickled me.

Suddenly he had me pinned. He held my shoulders down and his body lay across mine, weighing twice what I did. I couldn't move against him, and his expression was flat. It startled me, but before I could say anything his head was inches from my neck. A little bit of fear came over me. I felt him breath in and lower a little closer to me. he slowly breathed out, blowing soft air along my neck. Goosebumps immediately rose all over my body.

His hand slid up from my shoulder to lightly touch me. So softly that I couldn't tell if it was his hand or his breath. I wasn't even sure if I was breathing as he lowered his breath and touch down my chest and collar. His hand slid down my one of my arms and then the other, pulling my tank straps with it. His touch was intent and his soft warm breath on my body was hypnotizing. Part of me wanted him to touch me harder, the other part wanted him to never stop, to explore every inch of me. He didn't need to pin me down any more; he knew I was frozen. His body hovered so closely over me.

He blew air and trailed his fingers and nose across my cleavage and although the air was warm, my nipples harden as my chest rose and fell with my own pants. Jacob pulled down my tank top, tucking in under my breasts. A slight smirk rose in his cheeks, but he fought it to return his focused whispers of air to my chest. I knew he wanted to kiss, suck, touch, but he fought it and continued to tease me body. My craving to have him was increasing by the second. I couldn't really move my arms, as they were trapped with my straps and his weight, but I could try to move my legs out from under him to make my intentions clear.

He shifted his body further down me, away from his favorite place, to my stomach. He traced his fingers lightly across me first. I knew I couldn't get my legs wrapped around him the way I wanted, but I could push my throbbing self into him. I squeezed up into his chest. I didn't care where it happened to be on his body, I wanted friction from his body.

His hands clenched onto my hips; he was grabbing me, and I liked it. His fingers slid into my shorts and looked up at me and didn't fight his victorious smile. I felt my body shake inside with excitement and want.

"Didn't you like that?" he asked as he slid up my body to meet my face.

I smiled and raised my hips into him and was finally able to lift my leg out form under him. I hitched it over his, and his hand met it. He pulled it up a little higher as he kissed me, and I felt his hardness press against me. My eyes and head fell back deeper into the pillow as his bold moves overwhelmed me. I was panting as he returned to kiss my neck.

He came at me with intensity, he was almost instantly stiffer, rougher, and exactly how I felt and exactly what I wanted. I loved the softness of Jacob, but it was too much of a tease. He made me want him so much. If I hadn't already lost my virginity to him, his last actions would have pushed me over the edge to lose it ten times over. My hips were subconsciously gyrating. He sucked on my bottom lip as he pulled down my shorts, his long arms were helpful, and I kicked them off the rest of the way. he slid his finger into me, making me cry out moans and nonsense. This only urged him on, adding another finger. I reached out for his pants, trying to pull them down in my pleasure filled moment. I lifted my leg to hook them into his pants, and helped them slide down his body. It felt so good to not have to hold back; to have a want and a need, and have it answered.

There was no need to hold back, and I didn't. I immediately wrapped my legs around him and pulled him close to me. Every part of me was pulsating, hot and tingling. I grabbed him and pulled him right into where I wanted him. He pushed right back at me, sliding into me filling me completely. . I remembered how much I had loved the initial feeling of having him slide inside of me. It took my breath from my chest, but I wasn't sure which one of us moaned and called out, but I arched my body back into the pillows. He pushed his body away from my chest, but his hands followed my body, pushing past my tank top that was wrapped around my stomach and into my bare chest with both of his hands squeezing me and pushing himself into my centre. I resisted, pushing back at him, wanting to feel him completely inside of me, although he was already. We held there for a second, writhing in the sensation. I was pulsating inside. I needed him. More...

He sat up further from me, pushing us together, with his chest fully revealed to me.  
"Oh Fffff, Nessss." He panted, and his head fell back... I felt his hands climb up my body and he pushed my tank top over my chest and over my head urgently.... His hands rubbed down my legs as he began to move inside of me. it was like he didn't know where he wanted to touch or be. He looked as overwhelmed as I felt. he rubbed my legs that were wrapped around him, while making slow slight movements. I wanted more, I needed more. I reached up to his chest. _I need you._

Instantly he fell into me, not holding back. He moved inside of me in rounded, smooth motions. He was instantly good at this, without much practice. If my moistness wasn't enough, my thoughts, touch and moans were reassuring him, I was in pure heaven.

The passion in his touch, eyes and movement overwhelmed me. He pushed in and out of me over and over. Occasionally our lips would touch, kisses, eye contact and love were exchanged. I couldn't help but moan his name and grab at his back as he rubbed against me. My pants faded into his. He was enjoying this as much as I was, but the feeling of tightening and pulsating overtook me. I grabbed at the sheets, or him, I wasn't sure as he smoothly pushed into me. my insides felt like they were caving in, all of the tension released as I called pushed my head back and flexed and released my body. My moan was slightly embarrassing, but I couldn't control the way that felt or myself during those few seconds.

Jacob was still moving at the same pace as I came to seconds later. He looked like he was struggling. I had seen that expression before. He panted my name, and bit his lip. And before I knew it, he was gone from where I wanted him, where I loved him to be. His moan echoed as he curled over me.

He hadn't worn a condom, so he didn't want to… um… inside of me. I may have been an amateur, but I could tell that much.

After a few silent seconds Jake felt the need to apologize – for what, I wasn't sure. I was still recovering from my own release.

"I didn't know what to do, I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry."

"don't be sorry" _I wasn't exactly encouraging you to be safe. _ I touched his face in reassurance.

"I guess it is easy to get caught up." He laughed reach for his pajama pants that had fallen to the ground off the end of the bed. The sheets and duvet were everywhere, and the sheets really needed to be changed now. Jake kissed my knee and motioned me up and I grabbed my shorts on and went to the bathroom. I re-washed my face, but couldn't erase the tired but smug look on my face.

I stared at my disheveled face in the mirror. _I had sex, I had really great sex._

_

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**soooo,......what did you think of the first... and second time for these two?**

**I know someone mentioned it, but no, i don;t plan on making them be pregnant. this story does have a lot of plot to come.. I cant believe it is already 25 chapters. from now on it will still have some lemons, but plot will be flowing too. thoughts?  
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**hope you enjoyed. i have never written sex before, I hope it translates ok. i wanted her to seem overwhelemed, so i hope you all get that....let me know, either way!!  
**


	26. Chapter 26

I finally emerged from the bathroom to find Jake lying on his side, on top of the flat sheet that was on the mattress, with the comforter folded at his feet. The fitted sheet was nowhere to be found, but I had heard him run up and down the stairs, probably to rid of it. He had turned the lights back off, and the candle was still flickering light into the room. His gorgeous back was facing me. I admired the muscles in his back, as I had the ones on his chest and stomach earlier. I didn't know how he kept such definition, but I wasn't complaining. I crawled over him again, sliding in close to him to see his eyes closed. I knew he wasn't sleeping yet, as he wasn't breathing heavily enough. He sighed and pulled me into him. I gladded tucked in against his warm skin. His lips kissed my forehead as I slid my leg between his.

"You tired?" I asked.

"Not really, just enjoying you." He breathed in my hair and kissed it down. His free arm rose up and brushed down my head. "You?"

"No, not really." I was wide-awake, buzzing almost.

"Hmmm" he agreed . He seemed like he just wanted to have me close.

"you ok?" I had to ask. He seemed almost _too_ peaceful.

"Couldn't be better." He smiled, keeping his eyes closed, and squeezing me slightly.

"I knew we would get here." I reminded him.

"Mmm" he smiled, finally opening his eyes. Once I caught his look, I burrowed my face back into him. "It was great Nes. I am so in love with you. I am happy we can do this, like we were meant to."

"I know." He had a way to say things, without saying them directly. Something I think he may have gotten from time with my dad. "It was, you know, ok? Right?" I felt comfortable enough to ask him now.

He nodded his head. "Too good, almost too good."

"Worth the wait?" I probed.

"Definitely. I know it wasn't a long wait for you, but was it, better this time?" I felt his insecurity, but also he needed a little reassurance.

"I felt like we have waited a while for this. It was perfect and better then I thought it could or would be." I stuttered a little. He squeezed me again. I felt like I knew he was smiling, even though I couldn't see his face. "and… You are so good at it already." I squeezed him a little this time.

"I have good inspiration."

"Ha. How do you know what to do? Are you sure you haven't done this before?"

"I have." he whispered into my hair.

My whole body froze. Sure, now was a good time to tell me.. What could I say? Could I blame him? he had waited for me for 8 years. When though? Thoughts tore through my mind. Was it before I was alive? Was it with my mom? Oh god. Not that. I finally let one response out of my mouth.

"Oh"

"2 hours ago." He laughed. I pulled out of his embrace to see the smile on his face. "Never before that." He smirked.

"Jacob, that wasn't really funny." I hit his arm, now sitting above him.

"I've told you about imprinting about 60 times a year." He laughed. "You really think I could?"

"Well maybe before me."

"Don't be ridiculous." He pulled me back down to him. " you are the only one." He shifted his body and pulled me in to kiss my cheek. "Always." He reassured again. Brushing his hand where his lips had been.

I rolled to lay on my stomach so that I could face him. I closed my eyes so that I could tell him. Tell him how I really felt, how much I loved him. "Always" I concurred. It was all I could get out. It was ridiculous that I could _make love _with him, but not _say_ love to him.

I reached up to touch his face. His eyes were closed again, smiling slightly, looking peaceful. _Always._ I repeated.

He nodded pulling his arm over my back, feeling my bare skin. He smiled larger as he made contact.

"You feel so good." He said

"That's what I should say." I laughed.

"Are you happy?"

"Um hmm. Of course."

"You're ok with this?"

"ya. I couldn't have waited another day." I admitted.

"Ya, me neither. I think we thought we would wait longer, but I just had to… show you… " he smiled slowly opening his eyes again. "I am sorry I wasn't safe this time."

I shook my head to tell him he was being silly. "I wasn't worried about that." I smiled. "I just want it to be good for you."

"Cant you tell, it is?"

"I just feel like I didn't do much."

"no no, nes." He laughed. "You do so much." He whispered. "You have no idea how it feels when you touch me. not to mention the noises" he paused and smiled. "…..and your body." He rubbed my back again, closing his eyes. "It was almost too much. It _was_ too much the first time."

I grinned, reaching out for to touch his warm skin.

"Even if it wasn't great, which it was, we have lots of time to practice." He smirked.

I agreed by pulling myself in closer to him; finding his feet under the sheets and closing my eyes to sleep. I felt his lips touch me a few more times before falling fully asleep.

I woke up in a slightly different, but equally pleasant position. I was on my side facing away from Jake, but his body was wrapped around me. I could tell he was still asleep by his breathing. He was holding on to me tightly, our legs were tangled together, and he was more then happy to wake up to my bum into his crotch. I smiled to myself again. Waking up to him had been part of my favorite thing about our relationship. Everything about sleeping with him; going to bed, bedtime activities, waking up, all of it.

I felt his breathing change, and though he could be waking up. I pushed my bum back into him just to make sure. Either way, I knew he wouldn't mind. It was such a good feeling to not ever feel insecure or that I couldn't totally be myself. I most of all knew, that he wouldn't be upset to me making advances at him.

He kissed the back of my neck, reconfirming that he was awake. His arms wrapped further around me; pulling me closer to him. "Morning." He whispered. "what time is it?"

"eight" I answered, eyeing the clock myself.

"You must have slept well. You crashed last night?" he said kissing my neck again. I could feel every hard inch of him through his pajama pants, pressed along my backside. It was kind of exciting me that he woke up that way.

"Tired me out, ya know?" I teased.

"I could say the same thing about you. I haven't slept that well in months. Since before all of this, since before my dad, and I didn't even have that dream." He said nuzzling into my hair.

"You still have that dream?" I did not know it was _that_ re-occurring.

"Not last night…. must have done something right, or different anyway." I felt him smile against my shoulder before kissing it again.

"right and different" I confirmed.

"thank you Nes, I don't think I said thank you." Jake was suddenly serious. His lips pressed against my back. He sealed his appreciation with another kiss.

"I think you did say thank you, and you showed your gratification quite well actually."

"I want it to be as good for you as it is for me."

"I want it to be as good for _you _as it is for me." I rolled over and tucked myself into his chest and touched his face. I replayed what it looked like for me with him on top of me; how amazing it felt and was.

"I will never get use to that." He shook his head

"well maybe you should, because I think you are stuck with me now…." I laughed and kissed his chest. I could have stayed like that for hours. I twisted my leg in between his. I slid his pajama pants up his leg so that I could touch his skin. His hand crept down my back to the top of my bum. He slid his hand under my tank top and rubbed my lower back. I did the same thing to him, but slid my free hand straight down his pants and lightly touched his bum; knowing exactly the reaction I would get. He squirmed immediately and pulled me into him, and trapped my arm under his. He laughed, but pushed into me. his wake up call below the belt was still present. I didn't think I was helping, but I didn't want it to go away. I would always want to wake up to that reaction whether I caused it or, it was just a normal reaction for all men.

Despite my tickling attempt, we lay silently in each others arms for a while without saying a word before I broke the silence with a thought of my parents.  
"I guess my mom and dad never had this"

"what do you mean?"

"well, my dad never slept. She never got to wake up to him, like this." I had many references to 'this.'

"Ya, but they got to sleep, or be together almost every night without any parents knowing or caring. But no, I guess they weren't exactly like this." He laughed.

"Must have been hard, not to be able to be like this all the time."

"can you imagine the hormones your dad must have had built up." He chuckled to himself. "I thought I had to wait a long time. God, the guy was over one hundred years old when they got married… and finally… well you know… I guess, made you." He kissed my head. "I don't really understand the, waiting until marriage thing on your dad's part, if he knew he was going to turn her anyway, but I didn't push the issue there. It was none of my business."

"I am happy she didn't take the other option that was probably available to her." I knew jake was her other option, but at that moment, and always, I had been so thankful that she went with Dad. Really, he was the best thing for her. The people I know today in my mom and Jake, never would have lasted anyway. "I guess they have subjected us to making up for Dad's lost time though." I laughed. I was sure jake and I were both reminded of the many times we knew what was going on through the night, or in the other room for that matter.

"You aren't mad we didn't wait until marriage then?" jake smirked at me.

"Pretty sure I wouldn't have been able to wait that long."

"Do you think it's that far away?"

"Probably" I wasn't interested in being married at all. "I don't think it's necessary, I think it's perfect to be the way we are. We both know this is it."

"Right." He sounded hesitant, tucking my head into his chest more, resting his head on top of mine.

"What? Is that what you want?" I had to ask.

"No, not right now, but I do want that, with you. I guess that is just more _definite_ reassurance for me."

"This is definite for me."

"I guess I just get worried. It's stupid. Forget it." He kissed my head and rubbed my back, down to my bum.

I would forget it; it was stupid. I would show him how much of his I was...

We lay together for another few minutes before Jake suggested breakfast and showers.

I had to hunt; I had to try to get away from him for an hour this weekend. It had been weeks. I had drank my 0-negative emergency supply last week, but needed something more satisfying, any easy form of deer would tide me over for a few weeks. My tolerance and need last me much longer then my family, although Grandpa could almost last as long as me.

I had never been a threat or thought of sacrificing a human, not even close. I just got more irritable and less patient. It was almost like my own PMS'ing. We all learned to try to avoid it, and I didn't want to ruin this weekend with being on-edge.

Jake showered first, I brushed my teeth while he hoped into the shower. His comfort to be naked with me was increasing, and I could not help but stare every time.

I opened the shower before I left the bathroom to kiss him with my fresh mouth.

"you are so gorgeous, you know that?" I kissed him again, and closed the door on him wanting more, starting to kiss me the way I knew what his intent was.

I decided to make him a feast, as he had been working up an appetite and I wanted to keep him, strong, energized for my own intentions for the rest of the day, and happy when I tried to sneak away for a few hours.

He emerged ten minutes later with wet hair and only shorts on. _God he was beautiful._ I smiled to myself.

"what do we have here?" he grabbed me from behind; hovering over my shoulders.

"fruit salad, toast, eggs, juice. I am steeping tea right now and I can make oatmeal if you think you'll eat more."

"wow, this is a lot, and I wasn't even gone that long."

"I am fast, you know?" I turned into him, standing on my toes, reaching up for his lips. He lowered down to me and slid his lips into mine, his tongue slipped lightly across my lips, surprising, but delighting me. As quickly as he had kissed me, he pulled away, grabbing at the fruit behind me.

"you should have joined me in the shower, you know?" he said, popping a grape into his mouth. He looked so good. His kiss and his lack of clothing made me forget about food and hunting myself.

I ran my hands up his bare chest and around his neck, pushing my body into his. "we don't have any plans today, do we?"

He shook his head, grinning at me.

"Then there can be plenty of time for whatever you want." I wanted to show him my thanks in many, many ways. I was getting more confident with us and _our _love and our relationship. He made me feel comfortable enough to say what I wanted, show him how I felt, and have me however he wanted me.

I kissed him again, I slipped my tongue in his mouth, tasting the grapes, but pulled away quickly, teasing him, and emphasizing more what I wanted to do all day.

He shook his head as I pulled away quickly.

I finished making him tea and he made up his plate of food. I caught him smiling at me a few times, and I couldn't help but smile with him. we were both glowing.

"I am going to go into town quickly today, I have a few things to do, but besides that, I am all yours, all weekend." Jake said as he finished washing the dishes.

I really just wanted to camp out here all day and experiment more with him and his body.

"Ok. Can I come?"

"Nope" he popped with his lips.

"Why not?" he barely ever said no to me. I had to pry.

"wouldn't you like to know…." He laughed. " I just want to cash my check, and I want to phase and try to get Seth, check in. we emailed and organized that we would try today, soon actually. So I need to get going and find a place. That ok?"

"Oh, sure... Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I hadn't thought of that sort of communication.

"I just got the note from him yesterday. I emailed him about it a while back, but Seth is slow getting on email."

"Make sure you don't tell him where you are. Or will he be able to tell?"

"No, I know Nes. He won't know. I want to see what kind of range I can get if I needed to."

Jake went to get dressed and I thought it might be a good opportunity for me to hunt alone. I would tell him afterwards, and he could get mad, but also see that nothing bad happened.

"Do you need anything while I am out? You grocery shopped yesterday, but do you want anything else? A few movies maybe?"

"Sure, whatever you feel like." I was happy just to be inside with him, all weekend, all week for that matter.

"I won't be too long, maybe an hour or two."

Jake left in the car, and I quickly got changed knowing that I only had an hour to run and find uninhabited area and prey and get back without him knowing. It was going to be tight, but I had to try.

I put on workout clothes incase I came across anyone, and headed out of town. Within 15 minutes I was out of town and away from anyone. It was a lot easier here to successfully get away from anyone. Once I was confident I was definitely away from anyone I tracked a pack of deer. It had been cold and they were weak, so it was an easy attack. I satiated my need with 2 bucks and headed back home. It was a vulgar act and I knew I looked like a monster while feeding, which reaffirmed my need to do this alone. I was mildly dirty, but it was nothing a quick shower and discarded clothes couldn't cover up. Did I even have to tell Jake? He would be mad if I told him, and I was sure I could cover it up. But did I want to lie?

Half an hour after I got out of the shower Jacob returned home. I was excited to see him after only being apart for 3 hours, but his face was somber.

"Nes, we need to talk." He was serious, too serious for Jacob. "let's sit down" he instructed, and I followed him to the couch. "There are some things that I have kept from you, that I cant any longer."

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**Worth the wait? I have had this chapter written for a while, I just needed to tweak it and wrap it up.**

**Thank you for adding me to your favorite stories and asking for updates. I have been writing an original story and I am completely caught up in Wide Awake. If you haven't read it – READ IT. Woah!**

**Apologies for the delay. I am back on it, and ready for the adventure to really begin. I will still throw in a few lemons.….don't worry! Sorry if it wasn't worth the wait, I think the next chapter will be better.**

Thanks again. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!


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